Sitting Pretty Page #9

Mrs. King. He will not starve.

Mr. Belvedere,

I don't quite know whether

to congratulate you or to...

or to spit in my eye.

Well, yes.

It's a moot point. Mr. Belvedere,

please, we haven't finished.

You are mistaken, young man. We

have. I have posed quite long enough.

Oh, Edna. Bill. I haven't had

a chance to say hello to you.

Hello, Tacey.

I know, sweetie.

Let's get out of this

shambles. I wanna talk to you.

Go ahead, dear. I'll be up, just

as soon as I get rid of this gang.

There you are, my good man.

Look, fellas, enough is enough.

Get all of these people and

this stuff out of here, will ya?

Okay, boys, wrap it up.

Just one of the penalties

of fame, Mr. King.

Well, I'm not famous. You will

be. My book has made you immortal.

[ Man ] You can't go in there. [ Mr.

Hammond ] I'll go anywhere I please.

Where is this Belvedere person?

Where is he? Oh, there you are.

don't you take your hat off

when you crash somebody's house?

don't you talk to me like that.

I'll talk to you any way I like.

You fired me, remember?

Yes, I fired you.

You heard him.

Oh.

It gives me the greatest possible pleasure

to serve you personally with this summons.

Summons?

Well, well, how interesting.

I am suing you for one

million dollars for libel.

Splendid.

That's a good, round sum.

And I'm gonna sue you too. Good.

And me.

"And I," Mr. Taylor.

My mother and I

are going to sue you too.

In addition, we shall see to it that

you are run out of town. Excellent.

Such notoriety will merely cause the sales

of my book to zoom higher, if possible.

Would you two be interested in acting as

my attorneys in these threatened suits?

Are you serious? Mr. King, I

never jest about a million dollars.

Money is the root of all evil, and I

have the greatest possible respect for it.

Okay, Mr. Belvedere. We'll

be very happy to defend you.

Good.

How about it, bill?

It's a deal.

The offices of King and Philby

will open tomorrow morning.

And they'll have their work cut out for

them, because we intend to sue not only you...

But everybody who supplied you

with this libelous information.

Good idea. You should

always go to the source.

I intend to.

Has it occurred to any of you

gentlemen who that source might be?

Who is the person who knows all

about everyone on hummingbird hill?

Who is the one that for years

has made a repulsive habit...

Of snooping and gossiping about

his neighbors? [ Appleton gulps ]

Who is it among us who knows our little

peccadilloes with girls in florist shops?

The girl was merely delivering

flowers to that motel.

But they were not orange

blossoms. And you, Mr. Mcpherson...

you caricatured me in this

book as a notorious lush.

It was not I who counted the empties taken

away from your house by the garbageman.

Just one little moment.

Are you insinuating that...

I let the chips fall

where they may. But I...

and, Mr. Hammond, who is it that makes

a habit of reading other people's mail,

other people's perfumed mail?

Oh, this is outrageous. Are you suggesting

that I have been your... your collaborator?

don't be presumptuous.

Let me put it in terms that

even you will understand.

You have spread the pollen.

I have reaped the harvest.

But I...

this is fantastic.

I have been more grossly maligned

in the book than... than anyone.

It is only poetic justice that

a stool pigeon should be roasted.

So, you're the one. Now, now,

Horatio, let's not be hasty.

Why, you little weasel.

No, no, Horatio! No! No! No!

[ All yelling ]

Mother!

Mother! Mother! Mother!

I'd give my right arm to get a look

at Appleton with that black eye.

I bet it nearly killed him when

they trampled down his Iris bed.

Yeah.

How would you like to go

celebrating tomorrow night?

Love to. Would you

care to take me dancing?

Yes. But remember, I don't

dance as well as Mr. Belvedere.

No, dear,

but you're much prettier.

Wait a minute.

We can't.

Who'll sit with the kids?

[ Mr. Belvedere ] I will.

The mere fact that I have

been catapulted into fame...

Does not blind me to the

duties I undertook here.

Mr. Belvedere,

you're an amazing man.

Just what are your plans

for the future?

My dear Mrs. King,

hummingbird hill is only the

first volume of a trilogy.

I estimate the other two volumes

will take me about two years.

Uh, and you're going to

write them here?

Naturally.

Posterity will demand that the entire

masterpiece be written under the same roof.

This house will become a shrine.

I'm surprised

you even want to stay.

It can't be very convenient. You

claim you don't even like children.

That is correct.

[ Tacey ] Mr. Belvedere? Yes?

I think it only fair to

tell you that before long,

we are expecting another child.

And you'll find me

of great service, Mrs. King.

I was also an obstetrician.

[ Bird twittering ]

[ Chorus ]

Pretty baby

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