Slap Shot Page #6

A little bit south ofSaskatoon

Pick up the boosters!

Pull over, Walt!

Let's get the girls in here.

Come on, Walt!

Great.

My husband will kill me

when he finds out.

Let's go.

Their bus is coming up the street!

They're coming!

We don't need you here!

There's no room in sports

for people like you.

Get outta town!

Keep thinkin' ofmy honeymoon

A little bit south ofSaskatoon

By a big old fire and honeymoon

A little bit south

7-1. There's the face-off.

Charlestown Chiefs seem to be

coming down the ice with the puck.

Kill those Hanson creeps!

You goons! You can't skate!

We like to see an old-fashioned

brand of hockey played here.

You're a bunch of animals,

you Hanson apes!

Get outta town, four-eyes!

- Is this the guy?

- Yeah, that's him!

No, he's over there!

Ladies and gentlemen, look at that.

You can't see that. I'm on radio.

No, no, not him. That's the one!

Go f*** a moose, froggy!

Think we should get into this?

Just a thought.

- It wasn't me!

- No, Jeff, no. It's the other guy.

Think the old folks in Florida

are gonna like these guys?

I don't believe a word of that Florida sh*t.

The fans are standing up to them. The

security guards are standing up to them.

The peanut vendors

are standing up to them!

If I could get down there,

I'd be standing up to them!

- What hit you?

- An object, right in the face.

- I know. What was it?

- I don't know. Key chain, you know.

- Car keys, house keys.

- Keys to the camper.

- Hi, guys.

- The Hansons.

Guys? Put the f***ing bus in gear.

The cops have come for the Hansons.

- The cops?

- How many are out there?

The Hansons.

I throw up my hands. I can't control

'em any more. They gotta be punished.

Will you do me a favour

and put 'em behind bars?

They're looking for you guys.

There's gotta be some misunderstanding.

Look at his lip. Somebody threw a f***ing

tyre chain, hit him right in the mouth.

Scratches, made by human fingernails.

This kid has taken a savage beating.

There's six of them out there for us.

They're gonna put you in the same jail

with Ogilthorpe. Come on, you guys.

They let you make one phone call.

They book you, then they give you a dime

and let you make one phone call.

- Call the pizza man!

- Why don't you call a massage parlour?

- Hey, guys, we'll see you later.

- Save me a piece of pizza.

- Don't eat my watermelon sticks.

- Don't admit to nothing, you guys.

It's me - Reg. They're puttin' the Hansons

away on a trumped-up charge.

Someone threw a monkey wrench.

Yeah, it hit Jeff right in the face.

No, they were defending the honour

of Charlestown at the time.

The boosters are behind us 100 per cent.

Dickie? Have you seen Francine?

Sergeant, you will never meet a greater

champion of pure hockey than me.

Sergeant, I knew Eddie Shore!

- You guys back there?

- Hey, Coach!

Peterborough lost tonight,

so as of now we're in the play-offs!

Sergeant, I would like to see the bail

just a little more reasonable...

- Joe, hurry it up. Let's get outta here.

- Sergeant, when is the trial?

You can't keep them here.

They're folk heroes.

- They're criminals.

- Most folk heroes start as criminals.

Sergeant, you're asking

an exorbitant sum.

Joe, I got it right here. How much

are these goons gonna cost us?

- Hey, guys! Braden's bailin' you out!

- $250 each.

This young fella is in a hurry because he's

got the prettiest wife you ever saw waitin'.

- But she ain't happy.

- Sam, let 'em out.

I want a receipt.

Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, Coach, look,

we got to keep our bracelets.

Thanks a lot, Sarge.

- Let's get on the bus.

- Look at that.

The boys and I want you

to have this as a little memento.

It's a Chiefs key ring.

You can't buy these in stores.

- Aren't those Hansons something?

- Aren't they, though?

- They're sorta funny-looking.

- Real funny-looking.

- They're probably real good guys.

- Underneath.

- They couldn't be as dumb as they look.

- Yes, they could.

They're just goons.

Johnny doesn't care for fighting.

He told me so.

That's bullshit.

If we weren't so far below sea level,

the radio reception here'd be much better.

Ooh, I'm getting tipsy!

I've been shitfaced for the past week.

I only drink in the afternoon.

Or before a game.

Or when Johnny's away.

Me too.

If I'm not tight, I can't stand it.

That's terrible.

It's sad

So sad

It's a sad, sad situation

And it's getting more and more absurd

It's sad

So sad

Why can't we talk it over?.

Oh, it seems to me

That sorry seems

to be the hardest word

- How you doin', Lil?

- Hey, Johnny.

Hey, Lil?

Lil!

Hiya. Let's go someplace.

You know the Aces?

- Bully!

- Let's start something.

- Get the f*** out. I'm going home.

- Oh, yeah?

Where's Braden going?

I got a better idea. Let's die in bed.

- You're nuts.

- Jeez.

You really married a weirdo.

He don't run with the traffic.

- Speakin' of weirdos.

- Me? I'm normal.

Yeah? Well, then, normal is f***ed.

How come you talk dirty?

Cos my family has money.

Leave him.

My wife left me. I was drivin' her crazy.

All she could do was

drink and cry, like you.

Every time she sees me, it drives me

nuts, cos I know she's askin' herself

"How did I get mixed up

with a bum like him?"

- Good question.

- Oh, yeah?

Next year you'll ask yourself

the same question about Braden.

He treats you like sh*t.

He told me you only paid attention to me

to make him crazy, so that he'd fight.

Yeah. That's part of it.

But mainly it's cos I think you're a champ.

Only you gotta stop killin' yourself.

My place. Hm. That's a coincidence.

- Get out!

- Hey.

You gotta roll with it, kid. Use your

imagination. That's what I've been doing.

I can get you straight.

Beat it.

Well, I'll see you later.

I'm proud of you.

They're talkin' about you in the streets.

- Want a White Avenger?.

- No. Gimme a cup of coffee.

- That was a nice tribute to the guys.

- I tried to capture the spirit of the thing.

This is Dickie Dunn.

He wrote the article on you.

Hi, guys. Nice to meet you. I was tryin'

to capture the spirit of the thing.

Hi, guys.

See the game tonight,

compliments of the Chiefs.

- Gee, thanks, Reggie.

- Hey! Free tickets!

- Sure! Spread 'em around, guys!

- Hey, thanks.

Come to the game,

compliments of the Chiefs.

- Thanks, Reggie.

- You taught that guy a lesson last night.

- He was sensational.

- I guess that was a big fight?

- Are you in pain?

- No. It hurt like hell.

Oh, you poor thing.

Look, I'll make you a double dose of this

stuff, and you won't feel anything.

Good.

What happened to you?

He got that in the fight last night.

That is a very deep cut.

Will you be at the game? If I see

you in the stands, it make me feel better.

Hey, Killer! Get 'em tonight!

F***in' wearin' me out.

- Reggie.

- Oh, hiya, honey! How are you?

- You look a thousand years old.

- It was a long bus ride.

- Did you listen to the game?

- Of course not.

We got a new attitude!

It's bringin' success.

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