Snow Day Page #5

that could've been,

that should've been...if not for him.

Snowploughman.

- Oh, man. l thought you were Chuck.

- lt's me.

Yeah.

- So, you escaped the House of Pain.

- Oh, yeah, it was no big deal.

You should've seen me.

lt was unbelievable.

- Tough break back there with Claire.

- Nothing l can't handle.

Come on, Hal! Let me bring you back.

- "But l like zebras."

- A minor setback.

- What is your problem?

- l found that bracelet for a reason.

l don't wanna hear another word

about that crappy bracelet.

lt's not crappy.

What?

- Forget it. lt doesn't matter.

- Yes, it does.

Just leave me alone.

l can't believe l wasted

a whole snow day on this.

What mind-blowing thing

didn't you get to do today?

- You don't wanna know.

- Yes, Lane, l do.

This.

You said anything can happen.

Surprise.

Thank you, Sally and Ken.

We're here on West Burlington Street,

or should l say,

West Buuuurlington Street,

where this record-breaking snowfall

hasn't kept my fans from coming on out.

- Let's move. He was here first.

- We're not going anywhere.

- What do you think of all this snow?

- lt's great!

Kinda caught you by surprise, didn't it?

Caught a lot of people by surprise,

but ol' Chad was in the right place

at the right time, once again!

l'd expect nothing else from

the area's number one meteorologist.

Well, thank you. Hey...

Channel Six's Tom Brandston,

or should l say, Old Man Weather?

Tom...

That storm really fooled me last night.

How did you call it? l'd like to know.

- Just call it a hunch, Tom.

- A hunch?

- Yeah. The cold front...

- Can't learn it in a weatherman school.

l'm just kidding with you there.

l'm sure you learned that the upper

atmospheric shift that we had last night

led to the sudden two point drop

in the Fleeber lndex.

- Of course, Tom. Anyhow...

- There is no Fleeber lndex, Chad.

- You're a fraud.

- Well, you're a joke, Tom. A joke.

l'll tell you what.

To prove you're not a fraud,

why don't you tell everybody here...

Tell us where this comes from.

Yeah, Chad. Tell us.

- What, snow?

- Snow.

Snow. Come on. Well...

You know, the...

The Eskimos have exactly

eleven words for snow.

We, on the other hand, we only

have one word and that word is...

..snow.

When the barometric pressure

reaches all that cold, cold wind

that comes from ol' Canada,

it goes through a process that Tom

knows well is classified information,

and it forms what

we meteorologists like to call...

..the white stuff.

- You're a loser!

- Yeah!

- Could you get in your van and go?

- Sure, l'll go.

As soon as you tell everybody

who really was there

when the blizzard of the century

came knocking at our door, Chad.

- Who was it, Chad?

- Yeah, Chad?

- Tom Brandston.

- Sorry, l couldn't hear that one.

Tom Brandston.

Tom...Brandston.

Tom Brandston.

Tom Brandston.

- How did you know l'd be here?

- You couldn't go a day without diving.

You wanna come up?

So, this is the high dive.

Sure is...high.

So, anything

can happen on a snow day.

That's what you said to me

on TV this morning.

ls this the anything you had in mind?

No.

l mean, yes.

Believe me, this is more than anything

l could've hoped for.

lt's just not the anything

that's supposed to happen.

Man, how could l have been so stupid?

- No, not about you, about Lane.

- Lane.

l can't believe what

l put her through today.

- And when she kissed me...

- She kissed you?

- What did you do?

- l came here.

Oh, boy. Well, l guess you know

what you have to do.

While my mission had just begun,

Snowploughman's was nearly over.

Before him lay his last victim,

the final unploughed street.

Oh, yeah. Oooh...

Trudy, why don't you take it from here?

Atta girl. Here we go, baby.

You got it, girl! Yeah.

All right, Trudy, don't you worry.

Nobody's gonna hurt you this time.

Well, look who's here!

lf you're looking for a ride, l'm afraid

you'll have to wait till next year.

- Now, get out of my way!

- No!

No? No, huh? Okay, all right.

l hope that's " no" as in,

"Oh, no, please, Mr Snowploughman.

"Please don't roll over me

like a human speed bump."

"No" as in, "You've stolen

your last snow day from us!"

"Us" ? l don't see any " us" here.

All l see is a whiny little runt who's going

back to school tomorrow. Too bad.

Oooh... Now l'm scared! Oohh!

You will be! Listen to the wind!

That's not the wind.

Snow day! Snow day! Snow day!

Charge!

l'm sorry. lt's just so funny!

You dimwits actually think

you clobbered me!

But the truth is, l've already won.

Yeah, l have.

lt doesn't matter if l don't plough this

street. The other streets are ploughed.

l'll see you in school tomorrow.

You didn't think of that, did you?

- Actually, we did.

- What?

Now that you're done ploughing,

we might do a little un-ploughing!

No! You can't take Clementine!

# She was lost and gone forever

Dreadful sorry, Clementine #

Yeah!

No, not Clementine! Come back here!

Sorry you can't join us!

lt's gonna be a real hoo-hah!

NO! !

Trudy... Trudy! Trudy!

(TRUDY SQUAWKS,

SNOWPLOUGHMAN SQUAWKS BACK)

Lane! Lane!

Hey, Lane!

Hi!

(AL MARTlNO SONG PLAYlNG )

To help stop the bleeding,

apply pressure directly to the wound.

- Nothing happened between us.

- She'll never leave me.

- What do you know?

- What flavour gum does she chew?

Like l'm gonna tell you. You're a zero!

You're nothing! A zip!

- Go out with other zips.

- l'm not sure l'm following you.

l'm Chuck Wheeler.

l go out with Claire Bonner.

Yeah? Well, not technically.

Unbelievable.

- Nats?

- Hal.

You saved my butt!

He was gonna kill me!

You're driving

Snowploughman's truck?

Cool, huh?

- Remember l said l didn't need you?

- l guess you weren't kidding.

Meltar and l can

take care of the universe no problem.

Eh...l borrowed him. Don't worry,

l didn't scratch him or anything.

- l swear.

- lt's all right.

He belongs to you now.

You've earned him.

Just be careful, you two.

There's a lot of bad out there.

What's going on?

Welcome to the Chet and Wayne

House of Pain.

We gotta get going.

Got a lot of un-ploughing to do.

- All right. See you at the house.

- Okay.

Let's go, Wayne.

Nats, since we're gonna have

another snow day tomorrow,

l was wondering,

you doing anything?

Come on, Nats,

we've got a truck to drive.

That's right, Brandston!

Just walk away...chicken.

# A rose must be made

With the sun and the rain

# For its loving promise

Won't come true... #

Lane! Wait, please, we gotta talk!

Where's Claire? Did Miss Fantasy

shoot you down? Gee, what a surprise.

No, that's not what happened.

- Go away. l have nothing to say.

- Would you just listen?

- Before, when you kissed me...

- Hal.

- l don't wanna talk about that. Ever.

- Would you just hear me?

- Hal...

- My spine. Help, l can't feel my legs.

You're pathetic.

Looks like you're the one

with the reflexes of a dead cow.

- What are you doing? What is all this?

- Wasn't it you who said

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