Song of the Thin Man Page #3

What'll it be?

Chowder and be sure it's hot.

My rheumatism's killing me.

Cold out there tonight?

Naturally. Whenever there's a job...

involving some slight inconvenience,

such as risking pneumonia...

Michael Callahan gets it.

And a couple of hams on white to go out.

No piccalilli this time.

No piccalilli. What's yours?

A couple of hams on white to go out.

No piccalilli.

Thirty cents.

Sandy, I wish your chowder

was as thick as the fog.

Hey, you.

- Get out of the boat.

- Who are you?

Get out of my boat. That's who I am.

How'd you like

to make yourself a quick $5?

Get into the boat.

I just want you to row me out

to that gambling ship.

Get out of the boat.

- $25.

- Get into the boat.

For $25, I'll give you the boat.

Who's there?

I can't see my eyes before me.

It's Captain Kidd.

Can't you see the rings in my ears?

It's you, Callahan.

Did that come out of you, Callahan?

You'll be answering questions

instead of asking them...

if you can't explain what the anchor's

doing up out of the water.

Anchor? Out of the water?

I'll see about it right away.

Lay off there a ways till I call you.

Callahan, that ain't an anchor

out of the water.

It's a dinghy.

How did that dinghy get there?

Not very neat of the inspector, was it?

What's the excitement, boy?

It's just a razorblade.

Oh, no.

It couldn't have been Somerset Maugham.

Who's that?

It's me, bright eyes.

Who were you expecting? Admiral Halsey?

- What are you doing down there?

- Walking up.

You know any other way of getting

on this ship?

Here are your sandwiches.

Where did you get that?

- You brought it.

- How? By mental telepathy?

You put it on the box when you told me

to go look at the anchor.

- What anchor?

- The anchor that...

Look, Callahan,

you're past the retiring age.

Why don't you put in for your pension?

If you're insinuating

that I gave you that sandwich...

Well, who did?

Captain Kidd with the rings in his ears?

Callahan, if you didn't bring me

this sandwich...

then we've got uninvited guests.

What is it? Smell something interesting?

The maestro.

"A reminder that I love you. Fran."

"Unfaithfully, Joan."

"To Tommy, you dog,

but I can't help it. Alice."

Quiet, Asta.

"Under the Stars, introduced by

Tommy Drake and Orchestra.

"Piccolo's part."

The fine itchy-fingered hand of Mr. Amboy.

I'll take that piece of music.

If you're afraid of my bursting into song,

it'd be a bit difficult with the piccolo part.

- I said, I'd take that piece of music.

- Go easy with that knife.

Just one word from me

and that dog will tear you to pieces.

- Give me it before I let air in your kidneys.

- Wait. You win.

I'm afraid these old kidneys

wouldn't take a very good vulcanizing job.

There you are. Get it, Asta.

Drop it.

Come here.

Stop!

Get a hold of him.

- There he is.

- All right, you!

- That explains the dinghy.

- I'll report it to shore.

Asta?

Serenade to a heel.

Alias Tommy Drake.

Do you always feel so light-hearted

about murder?

With Drake, that bullet

was an improvement.

- Solid.

- Who are you?

My name is Nick Charles.

- Cop?

- Cop.

We got a pass from the inspector.

We had to get our instruments.

Let's go fellows. We're packing.

The Constitution says a gate's got a right

to earn a livelihood.

Well, we ain't so lively without our tools.

Do you know anyone besides Brant...

who might have been interested

in knocking Drake off?

Try the phone book. You may find

a couple names on every page.

Solid.

Wait a minute. He was shot, remember?

What were you doing in Brant's office

last night?

- Me in Brant's office?

- You dropped one of those blades.

Hold the phone.

Every man who uses a reed, uses a blade.

I ain't the only reedman in the band.

That whacked-up Buddy Hollis

was in Brant's office last night.

He was just trying to get his job back.

Did Brant fire him?

Drake fired him.

They had a battle over a dame.

- He ain't gonna kill anybody over a dame.

- Well, he was in there.

Where can I find this

whacked-up character?

He's been bouncing around

from place to place lately.

You'll probably dig him

in one of the jam joints.

Come again?

Dig him in one of the jam joints.

Where the boys go after closing

and really ride.

Just for cats and intellectuals.

Rooty-toots and bobbysoxers verboten.

Solid.

I don't wear bobby socks,

but would you say I was a "rooty-toot"?

Strictly.

But, I guess I can ace you in.

Considering the resemblance between

this blade and the one in Brant's office...

I think you'd better.

- Shall we go?

- Go?

The dust don't start rising

till deuce-a-bells.

Come again?

He means those jams don't get started

till around 2:
00.

Come on, get going.

You can't stay here all night.

Okay, Cossack.

You know the Park Towers?

- Yeah, sure.

- Deuce-a-bells.

Yeah, I'll be there.

Asta, where did you put that piccolo part?

Where did you put it? No, where is it?

You planning to spend the night?

No, I was just looking for my instrument.

- Is it one of them big bass tuba things?

- Yeah, that's it.

There it is.

Thanks.

If it was any bigger, it'd bite you.

Get it and get.

Solid.

Come in. You're early.

I was getting on a nervous kick,

sitting around there waiting.

- Darling, this is Mr...

- Clarence Krause.

Affectionately known

at Local 802 as Clinker.

How do you do?

The first spot we hit is Mitch Talbin,

big-band booker.

They really flick the whiskers at his bakes.

I brought along the old licorice stick.

Of course, if the reedman's already riding,

I'm nowheres.

Mrs. Charles always wears her mouth

open with this outfit. Come along.

No.

Swinging the classics

is strictly off the cob.

- Taxi.

- A gate who knows his dots...

takes his Beethoven

and his Brahms straight.

You know what I mean?

Get in.

No, thanks.

- We don't want to intrude.

- Get in.

- I'll be seeing you.

- Get in.

I've been waiting for you to come home.

I thought you were still noseying around

out on the boat.

No, I didn't care so much

for the passenger list.

I've been with the cops all day.

They suspect me for Drake's killing

because the guy owed me some dough.

That's silly.

If a guy owes you money and you kill him,

he can't pay you.

Very smart.

Elementary.

I tried to tell them Drake paid off.

I even signed a receipt that was written

in Drake's handwriting.

But they couldn't find that receipt.

I sent The Shiv over to see why.

I know you've got that receipt, Nick.

I want the cops to get it.

I want you to tell them where you found it.

You should have done that right away.

Yes, I intended to.

I'm a little forgetful.

I don't like people

who forget things like that.

See that you don't forget again.

I'll remind him.

- Is that the spot?

- Yeah.

Just a minute.

You forgot something.

Yeah.

You needn't wait.

- Man after my own heart.

- After my heart, you mean.

And probably get it,

if I don't dig up that receipt.

- Dig it up?

- Yes.

- I thought you said...

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