Soul Page #12

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©2020 DISNEY•PIXAR -

--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 72.

JOE:

22, forget about that, listen-

22

I need to know this, Joe. Why

didn’t she quit?

JOE:

Because she loves to play. She

might say she hates everything, but

trombone is her thing. She’s good

at it. Maybe trombone is her Spark,

I don’t know.

22 ponders this.

JOE:

Please. If I’m going to get this

gig back, I need your help.

Beat.

22

Okay.

JOE:

(surprised)

Really?

22

I’ll help you. But I... wanna try a

few things. Some of it’s not as

boring as it is at the You Seminar.

If Connie can find something she

loves here, maybe I can too.

JOE:

Great!

22

So...what do we do first?!

CUT TO:

Joe paces outside the bathroom as 22 takes a shower:

22 (O.S.)

WOEOWEOWEOOEWOWEEE! This water

hurts!

JOE:

(calling through the

door)

(MORE)

(MORE)(MORE)

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--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 73.

JOE (CONT'D)

JOE (CONT'D)JOE (CONT'D)

It’s okay. You just have to turn

the other nob.

22 (O.S.)

Oh okay, that's better.

JOE:

And I wouldn’t be mad if you put a

little lotion on me when you’re

done.

22 (O.S.)

I washed your butt for you.

CUT TO:

IN THE BATHROOM.

22 spits toothpaste into the sink:

22

BLECK! Spicy! Spicy!

CUT TO:

IN THE LIVING ROOM.

As Joe tends to his suit jacket, 22 tries to put on socks but

FALLS.

EXT. THE YOU SEMINAR.

A pair of Counselors is directing a flock of new souls into

several Pavilions.

COUNSELOR JERRY A

You five will be insecure. And you

twelve will be self-absorbed.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

We really should stop sending so

many through that pavilion-

TERRY (O.S.)

Found him!

They runs up with file.

TERRY:

See that, everybody? Who figured

out why the count’s off? That’s

right, Terry did! It’s Terrytime!

©2020 DISNEY•PIXAR -

--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 74.

COUNSELOR JERRY A

Wow. Nice work!

COUNSELOR JERRY B

Well, who is it?

Terry flips through the file:

TERRY:

Right. Joe Gardner is his name. It

looks like he’s back down on Earth.

COUNSELOR JERRY A

That’s not good.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

That’s the mentor we set up with

22.

TERRY:

All right, all right. Easy on the

hysterics. Terry’s got this under

control. I’ll handle it.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

How?

Terry opens a portal down to Earth.

TERRY:

I’ll go down there and get him. Set

the count right, lickety-split.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

Okay, whoa, are you sure that’s a

good idea?

TERRY:

Look, you all are the ones who

beefed it. I’m trying to un-beef

it.

COUNSELOR JERRY A

But you cannot be seen.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

By ANYone!

TERRY:

Don’t worry. I’ll make sure no one

else sees me. I’ll move among the

shadows, like a ninja.

©2020 DISNEY•PIXAR -

--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 75.

COUNSELOR JERRY A

Please, just do it quickly and

quietly.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

And also quickly. And quietly as

well.

Terry salutes, then jumps down towards Earth.

The Counselors look down after Terry.

COUNSELOR JERRY B

This won’t be a disaster, that’s

for sure.

INT. JOE’S APARTMENT.

Joe admires 22, now wearing his ill-fitting brown suit.

JOE:

Mmm. Trusty old brown suit. Still a

perfect fit!

22

It’s a little tight in the back-

here part.

22 points to the rear.

JOE:

It’ll loosen. Sit down.

22 sits on the floor.

Joe pushes over a tall stack of records in front of 22, to

use as a stool. He picks up electric clippers.

22

I’ll do it.

JOE:

You couldn’t call an elevator,

remember? No way. I just need to

line me up. Now be still.

Joe turns on the clippers. His entire cat body vibrates

unsteadily. He shakes as he reaches the clipper forward to

22’s hairline. 22 looks at him, leery.

22

Ahhhh... it’s like a little tiny

chainsaw!

©2020 DISNEY•PIXAR -

--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 76.

JOE:

Don’t move!

22

I’m not moving! You’re moving!

Joe loses his footing on the stack of records. They shoot out

from under him. The clippers sail out of his paws and take a

big, long divot of hair out of 22’s scalp.

They hit the floor across the room, shattering.

Joe looks at the reverse-mohawk on 22’s scalp, horrified:

JOE:

AAHHHHH! OH NO!

22

Don’t worry. I’m okay.

JOE:

No, no, no! My HAIR! MY HAIR IS NOT

OKAY! THIS IS A DISASTER! We gotta

fix this! Right now!

22

Okay! How?

JOE:

We gotta go see Dez!

22

Great. Who’s Dez?

INT. BARBER SHOP.

Inside the neighborhood barber shop, hair gently falls to the

ground as the loud buzzing sound of multiple hair clippers

fills the shop. BARBERS are cutting and trimming the hair of

MEN and BOYS while razzing each other:

BARBER:

How’d you get that big peanut head?

CUSTOMER:

Man shut up. You know I’m sensitive

about that. I lost my hair at an

early age.

©2020 DISNEY•PIXAR -

--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 77.

EXT. BARBER SHOP. DAY.

Joe and 22 peer through the window. The hair disaster is

hidden under a hat.

JOE:

Dez is that guy in the back. He can

fix this. Talk about having a

Spark! This guy was born to be a

barber.

22

But I can’t pass for you in front

of all your friends!

JOE:

Dez is the only one I that talk to.

We usually talk about jazz, but

this time just sit there, get the

cut and get out.

INT. BARBER SHOP.

22 carries Joe into the shop. The customers and barbers all

give a synchronized silent “nod,” then go back to their

conversations.

Joe’s barber, DEZ, is about to take on a CUSTOMER.

DEZ:

Hey, Joe! What’re you doing here on

a weekday? You didn’t call for an

appointment, man. It’s gonna be a

while.

JOE:

(to 22)

Aw, I was afraid of this. Go ahead

and sit down.

22 looks for a seat. Unthinking, she takes off her hat,

revealing the AWFUL CLIPPER DISASTER.

Everyone reacts:

CUSTOMERS/BARBERS

Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang!

DEZ:

OhmyLAWD!!

Dez pushes away his customer:

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--PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL

7/17/2020 Soul Academy Draft 78.

DEZ:

You gotta wait, son. This is an

emergency!

CUSTOMER:

What?! That ain’t cool, Dez!

DEZ:

You could always let Harold cut

your hair. His chair’s wide open.

HAROLD, another barber, looks up from the newspaper he’s

reading while sitting in his empty barber chair. Through his

bottle-thick EYEGLASSES, he silently blinks and smiles, too

eager for a customer.

CUSTOMER:

Nah. I can wait.

The customer takes a seat in the waiting area.

DEZ:

Joe, get your butt in this chair.

NOW.

22 sits, still holding Joe. PAUL, the customer next to Dez,

scowls at Joe. They have a history.

DEZ:

Should I even ask you how this

happened?

22

The cat did it.

JOE:

(to 22)

Stop sounding insane.

22

I mean, I was distracted getting

ready to play with Dorothea

Williams tonight.

DEZ:

Dorothea Williams?! That’s big

time, Joe! Congratulations!

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