Step Lively Page #2

What kind of a gag are you trying

to pull on me, young man?

- I never said I was Jenkins.

Who are you?

- I'm Glenn Russell.

- Glenn Russell? Never heard of him.

- Get rid of this guy.

- Come on.

Just a second.

Two months ago,

I sent you a play called Godspeed...

...and $ 1500 for a share in the

production which you readily accepted.

- And that's the last I heard from you.

- You sent me play Godspeed, 15...?

Pardon me, just a moment.

What did you say your name was?

- Glenn Russell.

- Glenn Russell, well, of course.

Oh, Russell, the playwright.

- Good to see you, make yourself at home.

- Thank you.

Let's get something straight,

what about my play and money?

- The play and the money...

- Uh-uh. One question at a time.

But I still wanna know about my play.

I'll let you in on a secret.

Your play is in rehearsal now.

And the $ 1500?

That's in rehearsal too.

What my friend wants to say is,

the 1500 is working for you.

- Glenn, it's working for you.

- That's nice, I worked pretty hard for it.

Could I ask you

how you earn so much money?

- Singing.

- Singing?

Oh, a singing Shakespeare. Heh-heh.

I'll tell you what to do. You go home,

forget about the whole thing.

We'll put on the play.

- And when it's all ready, we'll send for you.

- Why?

- You've got a home, haven't you?

- Sure.

- You got a mother?

- Naturally.

- A father?

- Stepfather.

Don't tell me you left your mother

with your stepfather?

Horrible mistake.

You ought to be on your way home.

- On the next bus.

- Sure.

Probably breaking the lady's heart.

- My mother's happy I'm here.

- Don't be mislead, that's a mother's mask.

- What time does the next bus leave?

- Hurry, you can make it.

Get his suitcase and hat. Glad to see you.

Anytime you come to town, drop in.

Now, wait a minute.

I've had enough of this horsing around.

I'm not going anywhere

until I find out what's what.

If he's not going to accept our advice...

...we're not gonna force

our opinions on him.

It might make him neurotic.

- What's that?

- Quiet.

I'm beginning to believe that you never

had intentions of producing Godspeed.

How could you say that?

Furthermore, if you haven't, I want my

play and money or I'll speak to my uncle.

- Your uncle, who's your uncle?

- Judge Russell.

Judge Russell's your uncle?

Isn't that marvelous?

What a character, what a cute fellow.

Don't you realize we've been kidding?

Don't you know

it's an old theatrical custom...

...the producer has a joke

with the playwright?

Prepare yourself for a surprise.

Tomorrow morning, at exactly 9:30...

...you're gonna see

your play, Godspeed, in rehearsal.

Well, Mr. Miller,

perhaps I've been a little hasty.

But I was a little worried,

that's all the money I had.

No more money, are you broke?

Where you gonna...?

We can't have you walking the streets.

You might be talking to strangers.

That's simple.

Here, take the man's things,

check him in downstairs.

Glad to have you with us.

Move right in here.

Judge Russell is your uncle?

Nice to have you with us, Glenn.

It'd be strange living here without money.

It's strange, but you'll get used to it.

Go in, wash up, make yourself comfortable.

We'll think of something exciting to do.

- Just how we gonna do it?

- Huh? Do what?

How are we gonna show him a rehearsal

when we're doing a musical revue?

No problem. We'll get some of our people,

some of his lines...

...show him a fake rehearsal.

- What about his dough?

- We'll fake that too, quit worrying.

But remember your blood pressure

and be a little more tolerable.

You'll be surprised how intolerable I'll be.

Not another cent

will be charged against his account.

- Gordon.

- Hello, Joe, glad to see you.

- Gordon.

- Yeah?

- What are you trying to do to me?

- Wait, take it easy.

- Who's this man you're checking in?

- Glenn Russell, famous playwright.

- Has he money?

- "Has he money?" he asks. Ha-ha.

What a question.

All right, by checking in here with you,

he becomes responsible for half the bill.

- Oh, no, no, you can't do that, Joe.

- Well, here I am, all washed up.

- Mr. Russell?

- Yes, sir.

- In behalf of the hotel, I welcome you.

- Thank you.

I trust that your stay with us

will be a pleasant one.

And I have the pleasure to inform you

that you owe me $600.

- What?

- Hey, Joe, come on outside.

- I'm not coming out.

- What kind of a place is this?

You move in,

and you owe $600 right away.

- Ho-ho. The guy's only

kidding. He's drunk. - I'm not.

You ought to be ashamed

going around in this condition.

- I ought to talk to the manager.

- I'm the manager and I'm not drunk.

Pardon me, Mr. Gribble.

Those 22 actors

are in the dining room again.

Gordon, they're eating again.

Joe, they've got to eat.

After all, they're human beings.

They're not human beings.

They're actors.

Isn't that wonderful? My brother-in-law,

he can't handle his stuff.

Have you had your dinner?

No, I can see you haven't.

Come out, we'll take care of that.

Hi, Fred, glad to see you.

Every motion picture

Has a moment on the screen

Exclusively devoted

To a bathing beauty scene

Wherein the banker's lovely daughter

Is submerged to here in water

With your permission

We will show exactly

What we mean

Hold it, one minute!

The lady must be in it!

Come in

Come in, the water is grand

Come in, come in and give me a hand

When you're in the bubbles

You haven't any troubles

You really can't deny it

Try it once and you will love it too

Come in

Come in, the water is sweet

Jump in

Jump in, it's really a treat

If you need relaxing, Jackson

Take this tip of mine

And come on, come on, come on in

The water is fine

Come out, come out, wherever you are

Look, who's here.

There goes the last of your week's salary.

- Like to meet her?

- I've met her.

You're a sap letting

that bunch eat you broke.

Oh, I don't mind.

They're pretty nice fellows.

One of them in particular.

So come out, come out

Come out, come out!

Thank you, thank you.

And now it's your turn.

We have a big Broadway producer

with us tonight, Mr. Gordon Miller.

So if you have any talent...

Come out, come out, wherever you are

- Wanna try it?

- Sure.

Who knows? Who knows?

I may be a star

Not bad.

I would like to teach you

Baby, if I could only reach you!

Uh-uh

You'll get to be a crooner, sooner

If you sing instead of cling

Spread out, spread out

Give your elbows a rub

Come on, how about you?

Not me, uh-ha-ha

I can't carry a tune in a tub

Well, thanks for trying.

Every country yokel can be vocal

Lady, that's a lie.

Well, come out, come out,

come out And give it a try

- Now who's gonna sing for me?

He is.

- You are?

- Sure.

Oh, by the way, you know Glenn Russell,

a famous playwright.

He wrote the play we're producing,

Godspeed?

Oh, yes, yes, of course.

The one you wrote on that typewriter.

- Uh-huh.

- Hello again.

- Hello.

- And you're gonna sing for us?

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