Stuart Little 3: Call of the Wild Page #2

some crazy story about a beast?

I'll tell you one thing,

if there is a beast...

...it wouldn't stand a chance

if I ran into it.

- I'd kick him. I'd tie it in a...

- Let me know how that works out.

- Snowbell, where are you going?

- To hide.

Before that Beast gets a whiff

of USDA Prime Snowbell.

Things werert bad enough.

Now I have to worry

about being eaten?

Is there someone there?

The Beast!

All right. Take me, you monster.

- Monty?

- You should've seen your face, pal.

- It was priceless.

- Glad to be a source of amusement.

- What are you doing here?

- I stowed away in the trunk.

So this is the fancy resort?

Resort? Right.

Well, it looked much better

in the brochure.

- I can't believe you lied to me.

- I didn't lie.

I merely distorted the truth to fit

the paradoxical reality of the situation.

At least you werert lying.

Well, I'm glad you came,

but now you have to leave.

Leave? All the way

back to New York?

- How am I supposed to get there?

- There's a new thing called "walking."

Oh, man. I don't even know

why we're friends.

All we ever do is fight.

Oh, no, I don't fight.

It's beneath me.

You, you're the fighter. But...

Wait a minute. You're the fighter.

Yeah, well, living on the streets,

you gotta be a fighter.

Rats and crows, street sweepers...

Hey, you know what, old buddy?

I changed my mind.

- Really? All right.

- Mi cabin es su cabin.

You can stay right here

under the porch...

...and keep an eye on things for me.

- What kind of things?

- You know.

Things that look odd,

or scary, or beastly.

Especially anything beastly.

I can't emphasize that enough.

And I will make sure

your stay with us is comfortable.

When you get hungry,

just tap on this pipe here...

...and I'll bring you food.

- Cool.

- Monty, I'm counting on you.

You'll be my first line of defense.

Hey, what do you mean,

"first line of defense"?

No, no. I said,

"Stay inside the fence."

"The fence." Right.

Right. But there isn't any fence.

I was speaking metaphorically.

I didn't know you spoke

another language.

- Goodnight, baby.

- Mom, I'm not a baby.

George.

What?

Okay.

Look at them sleeping.

They've got nothing to worry about.

I, on the other hand,

have to find a place to hide.

Cottontail, my fine,

fuzzy, flop-haired fellow.

How's the kids? All 50 of them?

Okay, okay.

I'll talk to you later. Cool.

Beavie! Beave, hey!

- Man, am I glad to see you.

- Don't even ask.

Come on, Beave.

I'll pay you back.

That'll be a first.

If I don't come through,

I am Beast chow.

Talk to the paw.

It's because I'm a skunk, isn't it?

I guess you'll be asking me

to stand downwind next.

I'd like to ask him now.

If you ask me, somebody

should teach that Beast a lesson.

Just once, just once, I'd like

to show that two-bit tyrant...

...the business end of my tail,

know what I'm saying?

Give him some of this.

Beast?

Hey, Beast,

I was just talking about you.

You are looking beautiful tonight.

There's another beast out there

going, "Where's my baby?"

Well, never let it be said

that Reeko comes empty-handed.

Fiber.

Okay, now, I know it doesn't look

like much, but believe me...

...there's a party inside this bark

and your taste buds are invited.

Or you could use it

as a fake moustache.

Oh, where did the Reeko go?

I'll go look for him.

You found me.

What do you say

I pay you double next full moon?

Okay? We're cool, right?

Yo, I am so sk...

Not good. Not good.

You never heard of closing the lid?

No swimming till four hours after

eating or three hours before eating.

- And no swimming while eating.

- Mom, I know the rules. I do.

I know. I'm sorry.

Just promise me you won't take

any unnecessary risks.

I promise.

Unnecessary?

- Let's go, George.

- Have fun, boys.

Don't worry about us, dear.

The Little men are completely

at home in the forest.

Yup.

- Isn't there someone in charge here?

- That would be me.

- Do you know anything about knots?

- Is that the troopmaster?

Yeah, but he hasn't

really mastered the troops yet.

Oswald, a compass

is not a weapon.

I'm Frederick Little,

and these are my sons.

- Stuart.

- Hi!

And George.

Oh, yeah.

I'm Bicklemaster Troop.

- I mean, Troopmaster Bickle.

- Hey, Dad.

- Are you gonna ask?

- Of course, Stuart.

My boys were wondering

if they could join up.

- Why, sure.

- Yes.

Yes. Per article 17

of the Lake Scout Handbook...

...everyone is welcome.

- Yeah!

Great. And how about me?

Well, there's no rule against it...

...but don't you think

you're a little too big to be a scout?

Well, I had some sort

of assistant position in mind.

But really, do I look like

I need an assistant?

Sorry.

Okay, I admit it.

I'm in way over my head.

- Little, you've got the job.

- Great. How about a Scout shake?

No, I meant Scout handshake.

Okay, walk it, turn and up.

There you go.

Attention, scouts.

We'll start with

the skull assessment test.

I think that would be "skill."

Okay. Well, that's different then.

The exceptional scouts

will get to wear the gold kerchief.

The intermediates receive the blue.

And for those beginning

scouts who...

- Need extra help?

- Yeah.

The red shows up better

when they get lost.

Okay, you just need

to row your canoes...

...from the dock here,

over to the shore there.

This might be a problem.

I'm looking for how well

you control your craft.

Points will be taken off

for sinking and drowning.

Give this one a try, son.

Perfect.

Thanks, Dad.

Ready, set, go.

- Come on!

- You can do it!

What the heck was that?

Get out of here.

I'm being attacked by a shark!

Oh, no. Oh, dear, I'm going down.

Shark!

Oh, this is it.

Goodbye, Mom and Dad and George

and Snowbell and Martha...

What are you talking about, Stuart?

Yes! I made it. How was my time?

- Could have been better.

- Good try.

I would have made it.

But there was this giant fish.

It was a shark.

And it was pulling me

all around the lake.

Didrt you see it?

Maybe it was

the Loch Ness Monster.

- Or Bigfoot.

- Bigfoot doesn't swim.

- He likes to be called Sasquatch.

- Whatever.

Sasquatch doesn't swim either.

Tonight, around this Lake Scout

campfire of burning logs...

...we honor you by awarding

these kerchiefs.

- Elwin.

- Go, Elwin. Yeah.

- Brooke.

- Yeah, Brooke.

- George.

- Well done, son. Just like a Little.

- Stuart.

- Yeah?

Sorry there, Stuart.

You stay red.

- Red?

- Maybe next time.

Congratulations, scouts.

Tough day, huh, Stuart?

Yeah. Toughest one ever.

You know, son, not everyone gets

a gold kerchief their first summer.

- Did you?

- Well, Stuart...

Well, okay, I did.

But the point is that

you try your best.

And that's what we Littles do.

It's only the beginning of summer.

You'll have plenty more

opportunities.

Don't worry.

I'm not gonna stay red for long.

Hey, Dad...

...I really love these talks.

- Nice shot.

- Aim. Aim.

I'm not afraid to fall

I've fallen many times

They laughed when I fell down

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