Susannah of the Mounties Page #3

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- Well, I, um-

Oh, you think I'm a freak, do you?

Come on.

Help me on.

Well, aren't you

going to help me?

Brave never help squaw.

You're not very polite, are you?

All right.

I'll get on by myself.

Oh!

Well, I could get on

if I had enough time.

You never ride horse.

You just papoose.

Papoose?

Don't you ever call me that again!

Stop grunting at me!

And you apologize too!

- Papoose.

- Ooh!

Ooh!

Where's Little Chief?

Didn't he wanna play?

Mr. Monty, do you know

what he called me?

A papoose!

That's Indian for " baby,'' isn't it?

- I'm afraid it is.

- I thought so.

- Excuse me.

- Wait a minute, Sue. Come here.

Come on. Sit down.

Let's talk this thing over.

I'm sure Little Chief

didn't mean to be rude.

Indians always treat their women

with a superior air.

- The women seem to like it.

- Well, I don't.

You know, even if he liked you a lot,

he'd act just the same.

You see, we're supposed to be much

more grown-up than they are.

There are some things

you just can't put up with.

Papoose!

But, uh, it's our job to understand them

and make allowances.

Would you like me

to make allowances for him?

He's our guest.

So, if you two had a little spat...

I think you oughta make a treaty

and smoke the pipe of peace.

All right.

I'll try.

I'll give him

one more chance.

- But only for your sake.

- That's right. For my sake.

I doubt if I can do much

with him though.

I've come to make allowances.

I didn't ever expect

to speak to you again.

But Mr. Monty says

I'm much more grown-up than you are...

and I should try

to understand you.

- So we'll smoke the pipe of peace.

- White squaw smoke?

Well, I, uh-

I never have.

But we're going to make a peace treaty,

and you have to smoke on that, don't you?

I guess that means yes.

So how do we start?

Thank you.

I only hope I've got

enough allowances to hold out.

Now, the first part of our treaty is

that you're to stop pushing me.

You're not

to be rude anymore.

- I mean, uh, any ruder than

an Indian can't help being.

And the second is that you teach me

to ride as well as you do.

- Much work.

- There you go.

- Are you going to make a treaty, or aren't you?

- Make treaty.

And the third part is that you're not

to call me " papoose'' again.

Do you hear?

Does that mean yes?

Can't you stop grunting? Say yes when you

mean yes, and no when you mean no!

Now, do you understand that?

What's the use?

I guess you mean yes.

Well, I can't think of anything else

just now, so we'd better smoke on it.

I expect you'd

better light it.

Here.

Now squaw smoke.

It isn't bad!

Anybody can make a treaty like this.

Oh, dear.

Must find Indians

who raid wagon train...

and steal from

Iron Horse camp...

so redcoat chief know

we speak with straight tongue.

Think ones who make war

on white man...

are from camp

of Lone Buffalo.

Huh? Why you think that?

Know they make medicine

to sun god for war two moons ago.

I go find out

if they ones who do it.

All right.

You go.

If find guilty ones,

take to redcoat chief...

so he know Big Eagle

keep word and speak truth.

Mmm.

dd

- Get me a handkerchief.

- Yes, sir.

dd

You look, uh,

very nice.

Thank you, Sue.

- How do you think I look?

- You look very nice t-

Mm-mm! Where did

you get that dress?

- Mr. Pat bought it for me.

- Well, well. Good for Pat.

Thank you, sir.

It would be a nice dress

to go to a party in, wouldn't it?

-You'd be the belle of the ball.

-If I was invited to a party.

Glory be. Where in

heaven's name are they?

- Now what's the matter?

- Your handkerchiefs, sir.

I put 'em in the top drawer here where they're

always put, but there's never a one of'em.

Oh, the handkerchiefs!

You had them in with Mr. Monty's

shaving thing, so I changed them.

I put the shirts in where the socks used to

be, and I put the socks in with the underwear...

where the nightshirts used to be, and I

put the nightshirts in with the sheets.

- But where did you put the handkerchiefs?

- In with the socks.

And it's taken me two years to educate

himself where to put his hands on things.

- I was only trying to help.

- Ohh!

What are you doing?

Give me that!

It's only a piece of old buffalo skin I've

been using to rub up Mr. Monty's boots.

- Ohh!

- Why, Sue, that's Pat's pride and joy.

- It's his toupee.

- Toupee?

- Sure. Show her, Pat.

- Yes, sir.

Oh, no. Put it on.

Oh, it's your hair.

I'm awfully sorry.

I didn't know.

It makes you look so handsome.

You oughta wear it all the time.

Oh, yes.

He's a lady-killer with that on.

He wears it on leave, and uses it

to fool the redskins too, don't you?

Yes, sir.

If any of them comes after me...

it's the toupee he'll get

and not me scalp, I hope.

- Your handkerchief, sir.

- You'd better get another one.

- You'll need two for dancing.

- Two? Why?

An extra one to hold against

the lady's back.

Faith and help. She's right, sir.

I'll get you another one.

You seem to know

a lot about dancing, Sue.

I do. My grandfather

was a wonderful fiddler.

- I learned how to dance from him.

- Here you are, sir.

Sue, come here.

Sue, uh, between you and me,

I'm in an awful hole tonight.

- I don't know the first thing about dancing.

- Oh, I can teach you.

I'll go with you to the party,

and you can dance with me until you learn.

Mm-mmm. That wouldn't be so good,

because they might catch on.

Besides, it'd keep you up too late.

Couldn't you show me right here?

Yes. But it would be better

if I went with you so we'd have music.

- I can whistle.

- Well, what dance will we start with?

Well, uh-

Why, is there more than one?

Of course. The waltz, the schottische,

the two-step, the polka-

Whoa. We'll just

concentrate on one.

That, uh-That waltz sounds familiar.

How does it go?

Come on.

I'll show you.

Now, put your arm

around me, like this.

- Wait a minute. I want my handkerchief.

- That's very important.

- Now, give me your other hand.

- Like this?

- Yes. You start with your left foot.

- Left foot. All right.

- You ready?

- Yeah.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

-Just glide on easy. One-

- One, two, three. Oh!

- The main thing is to dance very smoothly.

- Uh-huh.

Here. Try this.

Now, stoop down.

Don't let it fall. That's the way

they teach you in dancing school.

I don't know.

I hope I can keep it up there.

You can.

Now, let's try it again.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

You're doing much better.

One, two, three. That's fine.

Just glide along like you were rippling

over water. Oh!

Oh! We sort of

went overboard, didn't we?

You're getting a little

mixed up with your feet.

Maybe I'd better show you how it goes

first, and then we can dance together.

- Maybe that would be better.

- Now watch me.

dd

dd

Now with me.

dd

dd

dd

- dd

- dd

dd

You must be very fond of that piece.

They've played it every time we've danced.

Well, uh, the boys

know it's my favorite.

That's the music

I learned to waltz to.

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