Swallows and Amazons Page #6

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I came to declare war on you as well.

Oh, really?

That's very friendly of you.

Why not do it now?

Better late than never.

Or I'll do it for you.

I challenge you to capture my boat

at 3pm tomorrow afternoon.

[Both:
]

Accept, accept!

Blood and thunder,

death or glory!

He can be a jolly good pirate

when he wants to.

Well, I must be off.

- Captain Flint I know where

the treasure's hidden. - What?

I heard some pirates

burying it last night.

Steady on, Titty.

They had a huge box.

lt was very heavy.

You were dreaming.

I wasn't.

I heard them.

lt was the middle of the night.

Captain Flint,

you must believe me, it's true.

I only wish I could.

Well, goodbye, Swallows and Amazons.

[All:
]

Bye.

Goodbye. - Bye.

[Orchestral music]

[Titty voiceless]

[Orchestral music continues]

Pull harder, Roger.

[Roger:
] Ow!

My knee!

[Titty:
]

Which knee was it?

The one which I didn't scrape before.

At least, not the one

which got scraped last but the other one.

[Seagulls cawing]

[Titty:
]

Roger!

Look, the treasure must be here.

I found this. One of the pirates

must have dropped it.

[Titty gasps]

We've found it!

We've found it!

[Bang]

[John:
]

Lower sail as we come alongside.

Grapple and board him.

Swallow on port side,

Amazon on starboard.

He can't go for both of us.

Fleet will now attack!

Amazons forever!

[All shout]

[Bang]

- Kill!

- Death to Captain Flint!

Death or glory!

Down with the plunderers!

Man the cutlasses!

Death to Captain Flint!

Swallows and Amazons forever!

Agh!

Down with the white elephant!

[Shouts]

Yield!

Not while my flag flies.

Elephants!

Elephants forever!

We've won!

Your flag is struck!

[All cheer]

So it is.

Well, that was quick work.

Oh,

I surrender.

Bind him.

Come on, bind him.

[Jim:
]

No.

[Jim:
Groans and laughs]

Don't laugh.

Hands up

for making him walk the plank.

Look here, no weakening now.

It's too good a plank to waste.

Shouldn't we untie his hands

and give him a chance to swim for it?

All right, we agree.

All hands up.

Bandage his eyes

and make him walk the plank.

A clean handkerchief, I hope.

Mine.

Well, it was clean yesterday.

Would someone help that pirate

out of my helmet and put it on my head?

A last wish.

Whoops.

Mercy, mercy!

[Nancy:
] Now walk,

you son of a sea dog.

Ohh!

[All cheer]

Perhaps he can't swim.

I never thought of that.

[Jim gasps]

Sharks! Sharks!

The place is stiff with them.

Are there really sharks there?

A rope!

A rope!

Agh!

My foot!

Are they ready yet?

Nancy says, "Are you ready?"

Almost.

Just a moment.

A rope!

A rope!

You hard-hearted pirates!

A rope!

He's been in the water

a good long time.

And you'll never be in league

with the natives again?

Never.

A rope!

All right, Nancy.

We'll give you a rope.

I'd rather have a rope ladder.

There's one just there by the springboard.

I mean the plank.

A rope!

Chuck the end over.

[Jim groans]

Well, that's that.

[Coughs]

Even Amazons aren't ruthless enough

to make a man

walk the plank twice in one day.

Are all my sins forgiven?

If so, after every great sea battle

there's always a big banquet

and there's one waiting for you inside.

[All cheer]

Captain Flint,

we've got a surprise for you.

And what's that, Able Seaman?

My book!

Goodness me.

What a find!

[All laughing]

Say "Pieces of eight".

Come on. "Pieces of eight".

[Parrot:
] Pretty Polly.

Pretty Polly.

You're not fit to be a pirate's parrot.

The ices still seem pretty firm. I think

we ought to start on them straightaway.

Excuse me.

Here you are, ladies.

- John.

- Thank you.

- Roger.

- Thank you.

You mustn't eat ices

after walking the plank.

They'll give you a chill.

By Jove, I suppose I shouldn't.

You did walk the plank

most awfully well.

Practice.

[All laugh]

[Titty gasps]

[Roger:
] The Swallow and the Amazon!

That's what they're supposed to be.

There you are.

It's jolly well not fair.

It's schools and lessons for us

while you junket about and

enjoy yourself all the winter in Africa.

I'm not enjoying myself.

It's really quite a hard job.

I wish I was going to Africa.

I'd see forests full of parrots.

I'll bring you back one.

It's the least I can do.

Which kind do you prefer?

I like the green ones best.

Oh, I may as well bring one all round

for you if that's what you want.

[Roger:
] No, thank you.

Please may I have a monkey instead?

Oh!

With or without a tail?

Oh, with a tail, please.

The others are only apes.

lt has been a grand holiday.

But much too short.

Oh, cheer up.

You're coming back next year, aren't you?

Next year and for all the other years

for ever and ever.

Uncle Jim, do play your accordion.

Mm!

Say "Pieces of eight".

Just once.

Please.

[Parrot croaks]

Pieces of eight.

Well, shiver my timbers.

He never said it for us.

I say, Titty, it is a long time to wait

till I come back in the spring.

Why not have Polly now?

You always said you liked green ones.

Am I really to take him?

Of course you are.

You've earned him

ten thousand times over.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

But won't you be very lonely

without him?

I have to think of him too,

you know.

He is a young parrot

and it's much better for him

to be with young people like you

than with an old retired pirate like me.

He's not so very old.

Come along, now.

All sing.

[Plays "Drunken Sailor"]

What shall we do

with the drunken sailor?

What shall we do

with the drunken sailor?

What shall we do

with the drunken sailor?

Early in the morning

Hooray and up she rises

Hooray and up she rises

Hooray and up she rises

early in the morning

[Music continues]

[Plays sea shanty]

[Orchestral music]

The End

Swallows And Amazons (1974) English for hearing-impaired

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