Sweet Home Alabama Page #7

Anyway, spoiled's in the eye|of the beholder...

like these plums here.

Some people might|call them "spoiled"...

but I think that, um,|these almost-ruined ones...

sometimes make the sweetest jam.

Do you need any help?

It was kind of fun, seeing|Daddy up there, surrendering.

He sure does have|a flair for the dramatic.

You certainly don't get it|from my side of the family.

Hey, y'all.

Look who I found|walkin' down I-58.

I thought you'd be|halfway to New York by now.

So did I.

If I'd known company was comin',|I'd have put on the dog.

This is my mama.

She makes the best jam|in three counties.

And my dad...|you... you already met him.

And this is our home.

This is where I grew up.

Well, it's a pleasure|meeting you both.

I'm... Andrew Hennings...

Melanie's fiance...

well... that is... if...|if she'll still have me.

I really don't care|what happened down here.

So... you have a past.

I mean, who doesn't?

What I need to know is if there is|a place for me in your future.

Oh, good Lord.|That is the sweetest thing.

Well, go on.

Oh! Hello, New York City!

Woman, what the hell|you gassin' about?

Well, sir...

my mother happens to be|the mayor up there, and, uh,...

she'd like nothing better than|a big, snazzy New York wedding.

Yeah, I suppose|I can take off work.

Andrew, I, um... actually,|I was thinking,...

maybe we could have the wedding here.

Here.

In my hometown.

Look, Mel, if you're worried|about the money, don't.

It's not about|the money, Andrew...

not down here.

You know...|a lot of people

are expecting us|to get married in the city,...

but I think a nice, quiet, country|wedding is just the ticket.

Pearl, if you... if you folks could|take care of the rehearsal dinner,...

I'd really like|to take care of the rest.

Well, I think|we could cover that.

How many times does|your only daughter get married?

Other than before.

Felony Melanie?

She was never convicted.

I don't know which is worse...

child cat killer|or sons of the Confederacy.

What would you suggest I do...|dump her for being poor?

You're supposed to be|a Democrat, remember?

There is nothing wrong|with being poor.

I get elected by poor people and...

I'm a big enough person to commend her|for making something of herself.

What upsets me|is that she lied to you.

So what? She was ashamed|of her background.

Who hasn't been embarrassed by|their parents at one point?

I'm going to assume that|was a rhetorical question.

Assume away.

No one is going to|change my mind about this...

not you, not the media,|not anyone.

Fine...

but admit it...|I was right.

Yes... you were right.

There is a wedding in your future,|whether you like it or not.

And how, exactly, does Little Miss Alabama|plan to accommodate 500 people?

I suppose she has connections|at the jail.

Well, there are|several excellent choices...

the Travelodge,|Days Inn, a Motel 6,...

oh, and the Golden Cherry Motel,|where we will be.

Laugh now,|but if this gets out...

It won't.

The press expects|the Plaza in June.

Now, let's talk|about your wedding.

This place is gorgeous and|we can control the security.

The Carmichael plantation?

It did inspire your identity,|did it not?

You thought of everything.|- Yeah, well, I always do.

Been great.|Keep in touch.

You guys remember the sheik.|- Yeah.

Well, he proposed to me,...

and I think I loved him,|despite his billions.

Then why didn't you say "yes"?

Because I hesitated|long enough to realize...

my head and my heart were saying|two different things.

It's this way.|- Yeah.

Well, it's a big decision.

Well, it's supposed to be|the easiest one you ever make.

Wasn't it?

Hey, Tabby, this is it...

this is the stuff|I was telling you about.

"Deep South Glass."

Oh, yes. Let's.

What's the matter?

Oh, my God.

Do we know...

Mo'?

Mel?

Look at these.

It's what happens to sand|when it's struck by lightning.

She's pulling your dick.

No, really.|I've seen it.

You just have to dig it up.

Oh, hey, Bryant.

Friend of yours?

I saw him first.

I, uh...|think he's already taken.

I tried to call you|a couple of times.

Listen, since you're here,...

you and your friends should look|around and have some lunch.

Y'all should sit|on the deck. It's nice.

Come on, Bryant, let's, uh...|let's leave this lady alone.

Come on.

Come on, boy.

Yes, sir.|Can we help you?

I'm... I'm looking|for a Melanie Carmichael.

Anybody here recognize that name?

No.

What business you got with her?

I'm afraid that's a private matter.

Well, then, I'm afraid|we can't help you.

Damn reporters.

Like the first ant at a picnic.

Now... this one here's|from Louisiana.

See? It's got|a little alligator on top.

How sweet. I can see where|your daughter gets her taste.

This is one of those disasters|waiting to happen.

You know, one of the big ones|that only cockroaches survive.

It's going to be fine.

One down...|7 million to go.

Careful.

You just smashed|the state bird of Alabama.

Well, finally.|- Hi! How are you?!

Hey, buddy.|- Hello, sir.

Well, I can see|why Melanie is so adorable.

I'm so happy to be here.

We're so happy|to have you here.

I'm sorry the place is|such a mess, Mrs. Hennings...

Mayor... ma'am!

No, no, no, no, no...|don't you dare. It's "Kate."

You know, I've been|tryin' to get Earl...

to weed these shrubberies|and repaint the trim.

And... oh, my God,|look how pretty she is, Earl.

Yeah, I'll bet Kate|could use a drink.

Kate could, indeed.

Well, just come right on in.

I've got some fried pickles,|hot right out of the grease.

Had a lot of trouble|getting my house painted, too.

It's a lovely chair, Earl.

Yeah, but to get the full effect,|you got to pull this here handle.

Daddy, no!

Now, you hold onto|your drink, Kate, and watch.

We're so sorry, Kate!|- We'll get you up.

Name?

Uh, Buford...|Wallace Buford.

I'm not on that list,

but I've got some urgent|business with the bride.

Not today, you don't.|Trooper?

All right, sir, let's get it|turned around here.

Hey, there's a weddin' goin' on.

Yeah, I heard mention of it|a time or two.

I sure hope this weather cooperates.

It's supposed to be a big one.

You know, Jake...

You're my only son...|and I love you, but sometimes...

you are too much|like your daddy.

She made her decision, Mama.

For somebody who's been holdin'|onto somethin' so hard,...

you're pretty quick|to let it go.

You know, I can't control her any|more than I can control the weather.

It's just nerves.

You're doin' the right thing.

Am I?

When I married your daddy...

oh, Lord, but I was|a fool for that man.

I couldn't put one foot|in front of the other.

I remember standin' there,|thinkin',...

"Oh, preacher, hurry up|before he changes his mind."

Look where it got me.

Sometimes that man makes me so mad,|I could just wring his neck.

But you still love him.

God knows I do.

And only he knows why.

Mama... I think I...

He can give you a life|that we never dreamed of.

And he adores you.

He does, doesn't he?

Well, even if he is a Yankee,|at least he's sober.

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