Take Me

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- Cutting edge...

- Mr. Moody.

Yes.

Sorry for the wait.

Hey, don't even worry about it.

Let's discuss

this loan application.

Well, Cathy...

Can I call you Cathy?

- Sure.

- Great.

- Where are you from, Cathy?

- Van nuys.

I meant your heritage.

Where are your people from?

Greek.

Yeah, but my family is

fifth generation American.

Great. Well, then you'll totally

understand where I'm coming from.

Cathy, my name is ray moody.

I was born and raised

in Glendale, California,

And I am an entrepreneur.

I believe

in the spirit of innovation.

This country was built on ideas

That are progressive and one

of a kind, wouldn't you agree?

- I suppose.

- Yeah.

Great, Cathy. Well,

I'll tell you, Cathy,

I can't wait for you to hear

what I have in store for us.

Cathy, I run a business

based on one idea.

Helping people.

Isn't helping people the cornerstone

of any worthwhile endeavor?

Isn't that

what makes America great?

Isn't it?

Through years of research

and practice,

I've developed a system of nuanced,

psychotherapeutic techniques

Guaranteed to give clients just

the helping hand they need.

What the... What are you doing?

What's happening?

Oh, my god. Help me!

Hi, Stuart.

Give it to me straight.

What'd you have for lunch today?

- A garden salad.

- Don't lie.

You went to Baxby's again,

didn't you?

No, sir.

You'd rather have a jumbo, bacon

double cheese burger from Baxby's

Any day of the week,

isn't that right, Stu?

Isn't that why

you're so god damn fat?

No. No, sir.

I had a garden salad.

Garden salad?

Stu,

I found the receipt

in your coat pocket.

You had curly fries, too.

Don't look so down.

It's a matter of fact.

I stopped at Baxby's drive-through

on our way over here.

There's only one problem.

I bought a few too many

of these bad boys by mistake.

Think you can help me out, Stu?

No, I'm not hungry. No.

- Yeah, you are. Open up.

- No, I'm not...

Only 12 more to go.

No! Please, no.

I can't.

- Has it been eight hours?

- To the minute.

Congrats, Stuart. I doubt you'll

be visiting Baxby's anytime soon.

Yeah. I don't think so.

This got a little sh*t on it

in the scuffle. I'm sorry.

If you need a good dry cleaners,

I know a guy.

No, no, thank you, though.

I have to tell you, you were...

You really scared me

back there at the bar.

- Yeah? Thanks.

- Yeah.

I appreciate that.

Okay. Well,

what is the name again?

You can make it out to

kidnap solutions LLC.

People pay you to kidnap them?

For the simulated experience

of high stakes abduction, yes.

I'm not sure I understand.

Well, you might think of it as

a kind of alternative therapy.

My clients use the service for

any number of curative reasons.

"curative"?

Yeah. I mean,

Sure, some people

do it just for kicks.

But we have any number of people

combating addictions,

Drugs, alcohol, fatty foods.

To that end, we deploy

A number of association tactics

that descended from Pavlov.

He's the Russian...

Are you a licensed psychologist?

No. How is that relevant?

Eighteen months ago,

Your company was based

out of Atlantic city.

That's correct.

And what prompted you

to relocate?

The economy, my business model

was based on tourism.

Did the lawsuit...

Have anything to do

with your relocation?

Absolutely not.

In the interest of

full disclosure...

Give me a break.

Pardon me.

I'm sorry, but before

every encounter

I consult with my clients

to set very specific boundaries

About what's going to work

and what isn't.

I leave a paper trail,

I fax documents.

No, but you...

You didn't in Atlantic city.

No.

No. You know what?

No thanks.

This is an ambush, lady.

And based on

this bank's reputation,

I expected a level

of professionalism today,

And those expectations

were not met.

Have an awesome day, Cathy.

I'm sorry.

Do you guys validate parking?

Hey, it's your sister.

Where are you?

The party started an hour ago and

I told the kids you were coming.

And it would be very uncool

if you didn't show up.

And can you please not wear the wig?

Just leave it at home.

I just... I don't wanna have to explain

it to people. It's f***ing creepy.

Thank you. See you soon. Bye.

Hey, thanks a lot.

I really appreciate it. I'll pay you

back as I can, you have my word.

Don't worry about it,

happy to do it.

I was gonna tell you I've been talking

to some big money guys back east.

They really believe in

the concept,

Talking about franchise

potential, so I really feel...

Kids are getting big.

They do that when you don't

see them for a while.

Thanks for having me over.

Glad you could make it

this time.

Where did you conceal the rest

of the Montecristo jewels?

They're in the bank vault,

far beyond your reach.

Perhaps you underestimate my ability

in obtaining the things that I want.

You'll be very wise if you

don't writhe, mademoiselle.

Even a criminal dislikes to use

violence with anybody so lovely.

You tempt me, mademoiselle,

to steal something more.

Calling all thrills seekers

and adrenaline junkies.

Design your wildest kidnapping

fantasy today.

Phone in for a free consultation.

That's 1-800...

Hello.

Is this ray?

Speaking.

Is this a bad time?

No, no, no. Not at all.

I'm calling about

my free consultation.

Sure.

What do you have in my mind...

Anna.

Anna.

I have a fantasy.

I want to disappear.

Okay. That can be arranged.

Really?

I'm so glad.

Yeah, we have a whole...

Host of different scenarios

that we can

Recommend.

Surprise me.

The website lists a standard rate

for an eight hour simulation.

Is that negotiable?

- Well...

- Sorry, let me be more clear.

I'd like to go

for the whole weekend.

I'm prepared to pay extra

for the longer simulation.

You are?

How's 5,000 even?

Half up front,

Half after we finish.

- Ray?

- Yes.

I'm still here. That's fine.

I was going to mention there's one

more thing that I'd like to request.

Okay.

I'm kind of embarrassed to ask.

No, no, no. I've been doing this

a long time.

Trust me, there's no request

I haven't heard.

Slapping.

What's that?

During the simulation,

I'd like for you to...

Slap me.

- You've been on our site?

- Yes.

It's just that,

We have those terms up there.

Which I'm sure you read.

We're not allowed

to hit our clients.

Anna?

I was hoping that

you would make an exception.

I am afraid that's just

not possible at this time.

I see.

But listen, if you want...

- F***!

- What's wrong?

Nothing. Thanks for your time.

No. No, no, no.

- St. Blair.

- Anna.

Yes. Please don't

call me anymore.

No, no, hold on, hold on.

Is this legit?

What is?

You weren't yanking my chain

about the 5,000?

You can look me up.

I'm an account executive

At Carnaham-cutler-Monroe

west coast division.

I should go.

Wait, wait. Wait.

Ray, is our conversation

finished or isn't it?

No.

Then you'll keep an open mind?

I will.

I'm so glad.

You sound surprised.

Well, it's...

It's a lot of money.

Yes, but you understand

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