Tamara Drewe Page #11

CASEY:

Look at that cellulite...

JODY:

She been sitting on a bead car-seat

or what?

Casey turns a page.

CASEY:

‘Her latest tattoo count was nine,

including a Sumatran tiger and

‘Eternity’ written in Sanskrit.’

JODY:

She’ll be getting a barcode done

next. Right across there.

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 55A.

CASEY:

Nice baby though. I’d like one that

colour.

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 56.

Jody chucks her fag-end into the bin.

87 EXT. DAY. EWEDOWN - THE BUS SHELTER - FIVE MINUTES LATER. 87

The bin is on fire. Casey chucks in the Pringles box. They

warm their hands, watching one of the boys wheelie his bike

and fall off right into a freezing puddle. Casey giggles.

CASEY:

That Ryan...

JODY:

What a dick.

CASEY:

I think he’s cute.

JODY:

No you don’t. Would you snog him?

CASEY:

Maybe.

JODY:

Be like having a slug in your mouth.

Ben’s yellow Porsche speeds right through the puddle, further

soaking Ryan. Ben and Tamara are both wearing designer shades

despite the gloom; Boss in the back.

Jody and Casey are both on their feet in a second.

JODY (CONT'D)

Ben! Ben!

CASEY:

BEN!!!

RYAN:

Wankers.

Ben gives them a grin and a wave. Jody’s heart soars.

JODY:

Come on.

88 MERGED WITH 87. 88

89 EXT. DAY. 10 MINUTES LATER. WINNARDS FARM. 89

Jody is outside the back door. She lifts a flowerpot and

takes the key from underneath.

JODY:

She keeps this here for Andy.

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 56A.

CASEY *

What if she’s got an alarm? *

JODY *

Soon find out. *

Jody opens the door. They go in. The alarm is hanging off the *

wall, the wires pulled out. Jody grins at Casey, satisfied. *

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 57.

CASEY:

What if they come back?

JODY:

If you’re too chicken, go home.

The girls wander in, awed. Jody turns and grins, her eyes

like a cat’s.

INT. NIGHT. HADDITON - A BOOK SHOP.

90 90

Nicholas is doing a book signing. There’s a good crowd.

NICHOLAS:

Is that Claire with an ‘i’?

Beth has a tray of mince pies. Glen is at her side.

BETH:

What about you, Glen? Where will you

be?

GLEN:

In London with a collection of spare

academics. I guess we’ll be decking

the halls in our own erudite way.

BETH:

I’ll miss our chats. *

GLEN:

I’ve been in a state of writerly

bliss these last weeks. I hope I

get to come back.

BETH:

Me too. We’d love to have you.

Glen doesn’t want Beth to move away.

GLEN (CONT'D)

You know, this is the best mince pie

I’ve ever had.

BETH:

Oh?

GLEN:

If it was possible to have an orgasm

from mere food, this mince pie would

do it.

BETH:

(embarrassed)

Golly.

She moves away. Glen heads for the wine, kicking himself.

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 58.

Tamara and Ben walk in. Ben looks at the country casuals in

undisguised horror.

BEN:

What the f*** are we doing here?

TAMARA:

It’s kind of research; I want to

write about them. They’re funny, Ben -

come on.

They move through the crowd.

VINTNER:

The 2001 was the best. Someone just

bought my last three cases...

POSH HIPPY:

So I’ve got her this gorgeous

Rajastani gagara skirt...

Arriving at the mulled wine.

TAMARA:

Besides, I want to show you off.

BEN:

What am I - arm candy?

TAMARA:

More like arm fungus with that face

on. Ben, meet Glen. Glen, meet Ben,

my fiance.

GLEN:

You’re getting married?

TAMARA:

Uh huh.

GLEN:

OK. Beautiful dress, magazine

photoshoot - everything the

aspiring novelist needs.

TAMARA:

I knew you’d be pleased.

GLEN:

Have a mince pie.

BEN:

Can we get out of here?

TAMARA:

Wait.

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 58A.

She abandons him. Glen has turned away. Ben stands amid the

nice chat, like a man being tortured.

Meanwhile, Tamara is jumping the queue at Nicholas’ desk.

ARMY GEEK:

In Field of Tares, you made Fred a

corporal. But there’s no such thing

in the Royal Artillery. They call

them bombardiers.

NICHOLAS:

Oh, thank you for that...

TAMARA:

Sorry.

She flashes a smile at the Army Geek and puts her copy down

in front of Nicholas.

TAMARA:

Could you do it for Ben? He’s my

fiance. We’re getting married in

the summer.

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 59.

NICHOLAS:

So I hear. You have my heartiestcommiserations, Tara.

He hands her the book dismissively. Tamara is smarting.

TAMARA:

Well merry Christmas. Nicholarse.

She turns away.

91 INT. NIGHT. WINNARDS FARM - TAMARA’S BEDROOM. 91

Jody sniffs Ben’s aftershave, longingly. Casey plucks his

guitar. They listen to the note in hushed awe.

*

*

Jody puts her foot into one of Tamara’s killer stilettos. Shepicks up Ben’s drumsticks and kisses them, reverently.

*

*

JODY:

We gotta live the dream, Casey.

Live the dream...

Jody and Casey jump up and down on the unmade bed. Jody pullsa black T-shirt from under a pillow. She holds it to herface.

*

Ben...

JODY (CONT'D)

Casey is looking out of the window. The yellow Porsche isheading up the lane.

CASEY:

Omigod!

A wild panic. They put things back where they found them.

JODY:

Go! Go! Go!

She nicks the T-shirt.

91A INT. NIGHT. WINNARD’S FARM. 91A

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 60.

The girls sprint down the stairs and out.

91B EXT. NIGHT. WINNARD’S FARM. 91B

They dive behind a bush as the car pulls in. They lie on theground splitting their sides with hushed laughter, as Ben andTamara disappear into the house.

92 INT. NIGHT. WINNARDS FARM - THE KITCHEN. 92

Tamara and Ben are having a heated discussion.

BEN:

Why don’t you sell it like you keepsaying?

TAMARA:

Because... I’ve started writing.

BEN:

You can write anywhere.

TAMARA:

But this is proper. Not just stufffor the paper. ’It’s about my teens -

and is working for me here.

BEN:

Well it might be memory lane for youbut it’s doing my f***ing head in. I

want London. I want some Urban, OK?

Are you with me or what? Cos I’ve had

it with this place.

Tamara is hurt - and deeply disappointed.

TAMARA:

Of course I’m with you...

BEN:

It’s drab. It’s depressing. And every

time I look out of the window I see

*

Andy’s arse - what’s that about?

93 EXT. NEXT DAY. STONEFIELD - ANDY’S CORRUGATED SHACK. 93

Andy is bending down, the top of his arse peeking out in themorning sun. Ben stares at it with distaste. Andy is pluckinga goose, putting all his frustration into it.

*

BEN:

We’re leaving. Thank God. *

Andy looks at him. *

GOLDENROD REVISIONS 20.10.09 61.

BEN:

Tamara says you sell Christmas geese.

ANDY:

Yep.

BEN:

Can I have one?

ANDY:

Right now?

BEN:

Yeah.

Andy smirks, pointing at a big white duck.

ANDY:

That one’s spare.

BEN:

Is that a goose?

ANDY:

You can take it now if you like.

BEN:

(disgusted)

Oh come off it.

ANDY:

What?

BEN:

It’s f***ing alive.

ANDY:

Oh, you want it from Tesco, all

plucked and headless sitting on a

bandage.

Ben’s curiosity gets the better of him.

BEN:

How d’you do it then?

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