Teen Spirit

---

Behold.

Before you are the most

popular students

At ashley high school.

In a world governed by

the laws of teenage physics,

These girls are

the gravitational force

All else revolves-

around which

Royalty, if you will.

With an iron fashion sense.

And they rule their kingdom

But if you think the royal

treatment is all they seek,

Don't be fooled.

A queen isn't really a queen

until she gets...

Her crown.

It's prom. Prom.

You need a date, or

it's a reflection on me.

Not just anybody.

A-list. A-list.

Two varsity letters are better. Two.

Okay, okay.

A-list, two letters.

Got it.

Good.

And these poor dears

Are ashley high school's

least popular students.

Isolated from

the mainstream,

Our outcasts retreat

each afternoon

To a dank garage,

Making little piggy movies

That other outcasts

will watch

From their own dreary rooms.

The pig still

looks tense.

It can't be tense

for this shot.

Relax, pig.

Clear.

Cut, cut, cut,.

I'm not feeling

the drama.

We gotta go bigger,

much bigger.

Rarely do these two groups

And that's really

for the best.

I don't want any ninth- or

tenth-grade votes screwing this up.

Absolutely.

We'll round them up.

Round them up.

You're going

to be prom queen.

God, amber,

what do you want?

Every vote

in the whole school?

Yes.

Remember that sad sickly

boy who died last year?

I want his vote.

Is anybody unclear?

Because I think

it's pretty simple.

So clear.

Like crystal.

Good.

oink, oink. Snore.

And go.

And music.

Crazy pig turns up

the volume.

Crazy pig goes overboard.

Pigs are exploding,

and I'm getting nothing.

It's just empty noise.

Maybe lisa should

speed it up a little bit.

I have an idea.

Yes! Finally!

Another artist to help carry the load.

Great, lisa.

Oh, good.

No one's in here.

Uh, excuse me.

Oh, forgive us-

Amber pollock

needs this room

Important

strategy meeting.

Now, get out.

Hey. You don't

own this school.

Watch out, girls.

The elf bites.

Yeah, she's right.

You can't do this.

It-it's not-

Well, it's just not-

What's the matter?

Piggy got your tongue?

No, carlita. More like

having no life got her tongue.

Go.

As you can see,

When populars

and unpopulars collide,

It's not pretty.

Nevertheless,

it's sometimes inevitable-

Fate, as it were.

But I'm getting

ahead of myself.

Easy to do when

you're omniscient.

So, I'll just let

our tale unfold

And say no more.

Not another word.

Absolutely finished now.

Mom?

Can you come up here?

Mom's on the phone.

Tell her I want her

to see my dress.

Mom, she wants you

to see her dress!

I'm working!

For god's sake.

I think you look

pretty, amber.

Whatever.

Look, we can't

represent these people

If they're just gonna

second-guess me

What is so important?

Do you like it?

What, the dress?

It's fine.

I was thinking maybe I could

wear your diamond hoops?

You know,

for good luck,

Since you wore them

when you won prom queen.

Amber, please don't tell me you're

relying on luck to win you a crown.

You have to reach out and

take the things you want.

I know. I just wanted

to show you my-

Oh, I had

another thought.

Yes. Right.

I think we should

delay...

It's just darling.

Ha ha ha!

Oh, no one will know

it was mine.

Yeah, it's been so long,

all the witnesses are dead.

Stop it.

Tonight can be fun

If you just let it be.

Are you gonna help me out

at all with this?

Honey, I know you're feeling

awkward going without a date,

But the school website said

there'll be lots of solo kids.

There's no stigma

to it.

No stigma at all.

Welcome, losers.

Hush. That is not the

attitude to walk in there with.

I said I'd go.

That's all you get.

Hey, you know what? I think

that's the dress I was wearing

When we made you.

Right, henry?

Stop.

Oh, he was such a tiger

back then.

Mom... Stop.

I know, I know.

"if accepted at juilliard...

I would be... "

So freakin' grateful

to have an actual life.

"if accepted...

"I would bring

my great enthusiasm

"for all musical forms...

Including voice

and composition. "

Hey!

I didn't think

I'd see you here! Ha!

Hey, nick,

how's it going?

What's up, man?

You ready for this?

Sure, nick.

I'd love to dance.

Just let me get rid of

my imaginary date first.

Here you go.

Heh. Seriously?

Paisley, we're here. Great.

Voting just ended.

Perfect timing.

What are you doing?

Dropping you off. There

aren't any close spots.

You don't really expect the queen

to walk in there alone, do you?

I need to make

an entrance.

Yeah, but I'm

not gonna-

Make a spot. Now.

oh, man.

Don't worry

about it, really.

Come on! Move it!

Hey, amber!

Hey, girl!

What's up, amber?

Hey, girl!

Yes, indeed.

Let's give it up

for mixmaster ashley eagle!

And, as our hard-working

vote committee

Is tallying up the results,

I'd like to welcome

all of the students tonight

Feel better, barry?

Awesome. Ah.

I've just been handed

an envelope.

I wonder what's inside.

What do you think,

mixmaster?

All right.

Now, this year's

ashley high school

Holy toledo! For the first time

in school history,

A unanimous decision...

Amber pollock!

Yes!

Amber, no!

It's too dangerous!

That crown is mine.

It's okay, it's okay.

I'm all right.

Stand back,

don't touch her.

People, hey...

I'm over here.

No, not moving at all.

Oh, yeah.

As a doornail.

No! I can't be dead!

This is so unfair!

I had it in my hands.

Are you kidding me?

I always knew heaven

wouldn't allow nasty cuticles.

Do you have

an appointment?

But no one's even here.

That's because they all

have their own place to wait.

Oh, so...

This isn't heaven?

Let's just say it's

kind of halfway-

Like limbo-

made just for you.

Ah. Amber pollock.

Date of death-

right now.

Can you believe how

speedy these gadgets are?

I really think

they're the future.

Oh. Oh, well...

Weren't you a nasty

piece of business.

What's that supposed

to mean?

Ashley high

consensus says...

"queen b*tch".

Pretty hellish,

I'd say.

Hellish? That doesn't

mean I'm going to-

Not as yet.

Your life arc

was interrupted

Before reaching

its full formation,

So you're getting an

opportunity to raise your scores.

Putting it

in high school terms,

You're, like,

getting an extension.

Oh. So, I'm, like,

repeating a grade?

I have to go back?

Not in corporeal form.

You'll be more like

a spirit.

And you'll have a specific

task to accomplish.

If you succeed,

it's wings and a harp,

Never a bad hair day, and

you'll always be model-thin.

If you fail, well...

How do you look

in asbestos?

oh, lookie here.

The task they've given

you is rather ironic,

Since you were very nearly

crowned prom queen.

Oh, it was unanimous,

you know.

Lucky you.

You must take

the least popular student

And get this individual

elected queen

What?

And here she is-

The misshapen

lump of clay

That you must mold.

She doesn't go

to my school.

Lisa sommers.

Been in your class

for eight years.

She was your lab partner

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