Terminal Velocity Page #4

while you were counting!

Okay. Relax.

The cylinder is in my...

car?

Come on!

How do you stop this thing?

Come on!

- Ditch!

- Oh, God!

What are we doin'? Covering our scent?

I didn't see any dogs.

Why don't you tell me

who you are for real?

What does it matter?

We'll be dead in a few hours anyway.

Well, that's comforting.

Hey! Woman!

What?

- Excuse me?

- K.G.B. for short.

- Oh, come on! It's the K.G. used-to-be.

- Don't be naive.

So you're sayin' that,

that you and, and,

and Lex and Pinkwater and

Blondie are all Russian spies?

I'm saying we were.

We've been laid off!

K.G.B. laid off.

Auto workers get laid off!

I tell ya, one day this b*tch

is gonna run out of lives.

Where'd you learn that?

Moscow. I was gonna

go there once.

You have excellent

pronunciation.

- How do you say "ass"?

- Zhopa.

Well, no smoke up

my zhopa, please.

So, when was this?

Moscow.

Ancient history.

'80 Olympics.

- Well, America boycotted that year.

- Yeah, rub my nose in it.

- You were on the team?

- Gymnastics.

Trained for ten years.

Qualified in two events.

All I wanted was a shot

at that Russian gold.

Look at the haircut.

- Here.

- No, keep it. I got more.

You were young then. God. Sixteen.

Seventeen. Why didn't you try again in '84?

I probably should've. I wasn't about to

let my teeth get kicked in like that again.

It's them!

This makes a lot of sense.

light a fire when we're being chased.

Don't worry. I know them.

They never backtrack.

Right. Russian Mafia.

Amazing.

Well...

What have we here?

- Want a slam?

- Mm. No.

Krista.

Excuse me?

My real name is

Krista Moldova.

That's very nice.

It's very pretty.

Anything you wanna toast to,

Krista Moldova?

You're Richard.

Richard, right?

Yeah. I don't know.

Somehow, uh,

Rich and then Dick

got slammed up into Ditch.

Richard is nice.

- How long you been away?

- Oh, years.

I'll have some.

Y- You might wanna

let that breathe... there.

They're all back there.

Brother, father, mother.

And a little dog. Tambov.

Got hit by a car

last I heard and lost a leg.

Aw, that's terrible.

- Poor puppy.

- Poor puppy.

Only, it wouldn't be

a puppy anymore.

Watch out for the...

Oh, God.

- What was that?

- You swallowed the worm.

Well, I was trained to

swallow all sorts of things.

Careful. I may just

have to marry you.

- What's that?

- Just that normal male response.

No, I mean

under your shirt.

Oh, that. That's, uh...

That's your metal thing.

You had it?

You had this

the whole time?

The whole time I was talkin' about

my family and you... My poor little dog!

Yeah. I thought

it was important.

American!

Inconsiderate, uncultured...

Oh, good.

You can't be serious.

That is amazing.

What is that?

A flight chart?

Yeah. For a plane that

landed here last week.

With luck, it'll tell us

where that plane still is.

- What's so special about this plane?

- It's not the plane. It's...

- What's on board, right?

- Right.

Last coordinate is Cochise County Airport.

But it doesn't say where it's going next.

Once that plane takes off, it's

gone forever. We have to get there.

That's an airplane graveyard.

It's only five, six miles from here.

Great. If we run now, we'll

be there in an hour. Come on!

Run? I haven't

even stretched!

- Did you find her?

- No, I didn't find her. There's not a sign of her!

Call Cartagena. Tell 'em

we're comin' 12 hours earlier.

No, no! That's crazy!

She's not gonna go to the cops.

I say we get the hell outta here

and deliver on schedule tomorrow night!

Don't underestimate her! You understand?

She's smarter than you'll ever be!

Go. Go!

Why don't you tell me what we're

looking for. Maybe I can help.

- We're looking for a big plane.

- These are big planes!

- A 747200-C.

- They picked a good place to hide it.

Hey! There isn't, like, any

nuclear sh*t on this plane, is there?

Give me

the flashlight.

- Well?

- Yeah, this is it.

- Great.

- It's booby-trapped.

Is that something

dangerous?

Huh?

It smells like

old airline food in here.

Ahh! Oh! No!

Genuine dead people!

- Now what?

- What? A dead flight crew makes me very uncomfortable!

Level with me! Is this a nuclear thing?

This is a nuclear thing, isn't it?

Look, you don't have to come any closer.

In fact, you probably shouldn't.

- External genitalia are more susceptible.

- What? Susceptible to what?

- Here. Cover yourself with this.

- What is this?

- Use it as a testicular shield.

- Oh, come on.

"Come on" what?

I'm not joking.

Cover yourself.

And stay here. Don't move.

Well. Look at this.

I told you to wait!

Don't worry. I got my coffee-tron

dick defender.

I never said it was nuclear.

You just assumed.

- My, my, my, my, my!

- Put it back!

Do you mind? I spent ten years

chasing Russian gold.

Maybe it's not a medal around my neck,

but it still feels good.

Look, it's not mine, and it's certainly

not yours. So put it back!

What? You don't think I've

earned it these past few days?

I think this deserves

an explanation.

This shipment was heading for

the gold reserve in Moscow.

The K.G.B.,

the K.G. used-to-be,

hijacked the plane

and flew it here.

It was Pinkwater's job

to find a buyer...

and change the gold into

hard currency... cash.

There's about

$600 million here for...

- My God! Oh, sh*t!

- Damn!

Come on! Let's go!

Welcome aboard,

ladies and gentlemen.

...certain safety features

of our Boeing 747.

We have several emergency exits

on either side of the aircraft.

I'm gonna check

on the gold!

Your seat belt has been designed

for easy fastening and release.

To fasten, insert the metal

strip into the buckle.

To release, lift up on the metal flap

on top of the buckle.

- Vlad, get up here!

- Your cabin is being pressurized for your...

- Ah!

- However, should there be a rapid change in pressure...

Let's go this way!

Come on! Quick!

Vlad! Vlad, there's someone

in the plane! Check the cockpit!

Place the oxygen mask

over your nose and mouth and secure...

Pilot escape hatch.

Oh, God.

If you are traveling

with infants or small...

Please be sure

to put your own...

And right now we just want you to sit

back, relax and enjoy your flight.

We have to call

the F.B.I.

Money.

- Do you have a phone? - Mm-hmm.

Straight through that door in the lobby.

Do you have change

for two dollars?

- We really don't give change, but...

- Thanks.

- Hi.

- What can I get for you, young man?

- Some coffee, please.

- Cream and sugar?

- Black.

- Yes, sir. Comin' right up.

There you go.

Some special agent.

He said I had to drive all the way

to Phoenix to file the report in person.

Wouldn't even send

a goddamn field agent.

So, drive to Phoenix.

What's the big deal?

Those men came to the plane

for a reason, Ditch.

They're ready to move the gold. They

have a buyer! We gotta go back there.

No. No, wrong. Wrong.

I- I am not goin' back.

I'm not talking big heroics. All we have

to do is get their flight information.

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