That Thing You Do! Page #10

Mr. Scott Pell.

- How you doing?

- Replacement?

- Yes.

- Who's he played with?

The Techniques...

uh, Roy Maxwell and The Corsairs.

[Chuckles]

Really?

He's your new bass player.

Mr. White-no offense-

we've been together for a while.

- There aren't a lot of options here, Guy.

- Can he handle our tune?

I think I can handle it, junior.

- Okay.

- All right.

Mr. White. Faye's not gonna

miss this, is she?

Oh, no. She'll be here.

I've taken care of her.

[No Audible Dialogue]

Hello.

Um, I'm Faye Dolan.

I'm a V.I.P. guest of The Wonders.

- Mr. White. Can I have a word with you?

- Did you get some dinner?

Can we talk about the songs we

need to bring into the studio?

- Let's do that after the show, okay, Jimmy?

- Please? Let's do that.

Hey, are you ready for tonight?

Are you gonna be magic?

You better be magic.

["My World Is Over'"]

Fifteen minutes and this boat sails.

- I'm gonna need an aspirin.

- Okay.

There's milk in my coffee.

There's milk in my coffee, Boards!

Now how many times do I have

to say, no milk in the coffee?

You know what scares me?

You're the soundman and you don't seem to listen.

I should have my head examined

for being in this business.

For criminy sakes,

no milk in the coffee!

Miss Dolan, here's your seat.

- Here?

- Yeah.

Thank you.

"Special guest,

the amazing Charlie Frye...

"Canadian funnymen,

Fletcher and O'Shaughnessy...

"Astronaut Virgil 'Gus' Grissom...

Paul Pope's primitive primates"?

"Teen sensations, The Wonders."

[Deepens Voice] The Wonders.

Teen sensations, The Wonders!

The Won-Wonders.

All right, try this. Here's the church.

There's the steeple.

- Open it a little bigger and there's all the people.

- [Laughing]

Hey, man, whatever you do,

don't think of pork chops!

What? I'm trying to help him out.

[Announcer] From the brand-new

City of Broadcasting

in Santa Monica, California...

it's The Hollywood Television Showcase!

It's starting! It's starting!

It's starting! Get in here!

Oh, look, look!

It's starting!

It's not 10:
00 yet.

...Canadian funnymen,

Fletcher and O'Shaughnessy!

Astronaut Virgil "Gus" Grissom!

Paul Pope's primitive primates!

Teen sensations The Wonders!

Aaaaaah!

Aaah!

Oh, God, I'm scared!

Give me the remote control.

Give me the remote control.

Hey, Mr. P, do you think Guy

got to meet Gus Grissom?

Oh, man, wouldn't

that be something

if he met Gus Grissom?

That's a good picture

there now.

Look at that.

...nylon,

and acrylon fibers.

And now, here's the star

of this week's showcase...

Troy Chesterfield!

Thank you!

[Audience Cheers And Applauds]

All right now,

everybody settle down.

He won't be on for

another half-hour.

They got a bunch of other acts

that come on before.

Yeah. Last week,

they had this elephant-

Oh, playing

the harmonica!

But seriously, Gus...

what is it like flying up there

in outer space

in the-what is it-

the Gemini?

That's right, Troy.

It'll be called the Gemini.

See, I guess I'd

have to say

that flying in outer space

is a lot like your working

with Gina Lollobrigida

in your latest movie-

It's out of this world.

Here's a question I have...

Going back to one.

How's the food?

Go one!

It's pretty good, Troy.

NASA's working on

new zero-g food all the time.

- Take 2!

- Like what?

Well, just last week,

I sampled a compressed

turkey product,

processed succotash,

and a packet of concentrated

prune juice-

[Studio Orchestra Playing]

[Audience Laughs]

Oh... that's gotta hurt.

Stage manager:
Teen sensations

The Wonders to the stage, please.

Boys, we go.

Teen sensations The Wonders

to the stage.

You look fabulous in the black suits.

Have I told you that?

Hi-fabulous in

the black suits.

I can just imagine

Guy backstage right now,

just waiting to go on.

You think they'll show

a shot of him backstage, dear,

waiting to go on?

No, honey, they won't show

him backstage.

They'll show him

when he comes out to perform.

I wonder how many people

are watching this.

How many people saw The Beatles

on The Ed Sullivan Show?

Excuse me.

Is that where The Wonders come out?

Yeah, right there.

[Scattered Squeals]

Hey, Skitch...

how did we get here?

I led you here, sir...

for I am Spartacus.

Stage manager:
We're coming back!

[Audience Cheers]

And now... for you kids,

the latest rock 'n' roll group

to challenge The Beatles

to a hair-combing contest-

That's just

what we all need-

The new teen sensations,

The Wonders!

[Audience Cheers]

[Pop]

[Singing]

Ready on 2 there, Ray.

go.

Ready 4!

There he is!

Just look at him!

Ha ha ha ha!

Ready 4!

We don't have

to hurry this.

Slow move in.

There's not a big hurry here.

Not a big hurry.

Nice and easy.

That's a pretty shot.

That a baby!

That a baby!

Quiet down!

I'm trying to hear it!

Supers coming up.

It's time for America

to meet The Wonders.

Let's make 'em look good.

And go!

Leo, there's

a good-looking kid.

And go!

Wolfman:
Too scary.

Go! Shades, that a baby.

And go! Jimmy.

Careful, girls, he's engaged.

Congratulations, Jimmy.

Hold it...

[Thunderous Cheering

And Applause]

Aaaaah!

[Singing]

Oh, that's hilarious!

- [Grissom Chattering]

- [Mr. White] Yes, Lenny. Hey, Lloyd.

Listen, you're not gonna believe who I've got

right here who wants to say hello to you.

No, he does. Gus Grissom.

That's right.

- Just say hello. It'd mean the world to him.

- Hello, Floyd.

- Lloyd.

- Lloyd, hi. This is Gus Grissom.

[Chattering, Laughing]

So, it just appeared like magic

for the whole world to see?

I didn't say anything.

I was just as surprised as you.

"Careful, girls,

he's engaged."

Am I supposed to buy you

some diamond ring now?

You're ruining this

beautiful moment.

Where'd you get the idea

that we're engaged?

We're not!

That's the last thing

I need in the world.

- [Door Opens]

- We were great! What, are you kidding?

[Giggling] You're kidding.

You kidder.

Hey, man, you have a couple

of hundred bucks?

I need some extra scratch

for the craps tables.

No.

No?

Come on!

Just a little bit.

This is my first trip to Vegas.

Try Guy. He's a sucker.

Well, that was very nice.

Whitey, can you spot me

some blackjack cash?

That would be

against my policy.

Mr. White, it isn't true.

Oh ho ho ho!

Guy, can I borrow

some money?

- 200 bucks.

- How much you want?

Hah. Chump change.

Good lord, Faye,

you look gorgeous.

Now, next up

for you kids...

you get to make

another record.

Can I say something?

Hey, the fair Faye

wishes to address us all, so it's...

Jimmy...

from now on, you stay away from me.

I have wasted thousands and thousands

of kisses on you.

Kisses that I thought were special

because of your lips and your smile...

and all your color and life.

I used to think that was the real you

when you smiled.

But now I know that you

don't mean any of it...

and you just save it

for all your songs.

Shame on me for kissing you

with my eyes closed so tight.

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