The 7.39
- Year:
- 2014
- 59 min
- 180 Views
I'm going to miss my train.
Ryan, I thought I got Mondays off.
I'm going to smell that all day now.
Cat food. Smell that.
Why would I want to do that?
I'm going grey.
So do what I do, dye it.
No, I don't mean just my hair,
I mean my face.
Look, skin's like window putty.
I look knackered.
Well, feel free to jump in any
time you want.
Actually, Ryan, if I could be alone?
No? Oh, OK. Hi.
I told you not to put
things in halfway through the cycle.
It's a washing cycle, isn't it?
There's nothing "eco" about it
if you have to wash it twice.
And will people leave the thermostat
alone, please?!
I'll See you tonight!
Bye!
See you later!
Anyone?
Anyone?
All right.
I've got total body pump at
10:
30 and boxercise at lunchtime.Enjoy Boxercise. Go and make them
suffer.
I've got to go fight for a seat.
Kick them in the ankles.
Love you. Love you. No, love you.
I actually do have to go.
I know. See ya.
See ya.
Platform one for
the 07:
39 to...Here we go. Elbows out.
.. A trolley service of drinks
and light refreshments is
available on this train.
This train is for London Waterloo.
Excuse me, you're in my seat.
Sorry, is it reserved?
I was just putting my coat up.
I don't see a reservation.
No, there are no reservations.
So it's your seat because?
Because I saw it first. You reserved
it with your magic eyes?
I was putting my coat up
and you barged in.
I didn't "barge" in.
Snuck in, sneaked, sneaked in.
I didn't "sneak", I sat down.
There are rules, etiquette,
otherwise it all becomes a bloody
free-for-all! No need to shout.
I'm not, I could just do without
this on a Mon...
Fine, just have it. Just have it.
No, no, no! If you need it
so badly, I'll just get up.
I'm actually getting off at the next
stop. Really? Yes.
Are you sure? Thank you.
That's very kind.
What a kind man. Thank you.
Very kind. Thank you.
Yeah, thank you.
So, everyone's happy.
This train is
approaching its final stop.
This is London Waterloo.
Change here for London Underground
services.
Please remember to take
all your personal items with you
when you leave the train.
Anyone drown? No.
But it's early.
Who leaves plasters in the pool?
It's the men.
With their verrucas
and their athlete's foot.
Pleasant journey, then?
Some man bawled at me
for sitting in his special seat.
I swear that commute's going
to kill me, Kerry.
Two hours a day breathing
into someone's armpit then home to
sit with Ryan and discuss confetti.
Let's talk about work.
I love work.
Monday morning I wake with a
silly grin on my face
cos I get to see your lovely
fresh faces.
Bank holiday? Waste of time.
Easter, what's that about?
I love targets, deadlines,
I love it all.
But perhaps some of you haven't
noticed,
it is a competitive market.
And if anyone here thinks there's
time to sit around watching videos
of cats while our clients have got
7,000 square feet in Leyton,
then they are mistaken.
THESE rents pay your rent.
Sorry, Jubilee Line...
You stopped for coffee, Martin.
Now...
I've lost my train of
thought. We're finished.
Just erm...
get on with it, will you?
Look at him.
Can't even manage a hot drink.
One of your appointments, isn't he?
Well, he's a dead man walking, Carl.
Really?
What? You want me to erm...?
Would you mind, awfully?
Couldn't we just give him
a written warning?
What, another one?
They've just had a kid.
Well, if you're really worried,
tell him it's my bad.
No.
My responsibility.
responsibility. " Where's that from?
I don't know, I'm sorry. Spider-Man.
By end of week, if you please.
Candles and a live band.
It's your own little bistro.
What is this exactly?
Frere Jacques, I think.
No, I meant the black
stuff on the fish.
Tapenade. I know it looks like a
tanker disaster
but you can scrape it of with the back
of your knife - that's what I did.
No, I love it. A taste of the Med.
I need a new violin.
And where's our beloved son?
Play rehearsals.
Christ, not again.
I've only just got over Equus.
I said I need a new violin.
And how much is that going to
cost me? I don't know,?400?
I'm not made of money, Charlotte.
This one's awful.
Well, is that the violin's fault?
Just give it a break, will you,
maestro?
I'd pay her four hundred quid
to pack it in.
What?
It's expensive,
but the big plus is we can do
the whole wedding in the same venue.
Sal?
Look, they've had a cancellation
and we've got first refusal.
It's a bloody great castle, Ryan.
What, you think it's too much?
Not if we come under
attack by Vikings,
but it's just me and you getting
married.
"Just".
The thing is, I've done the big
wedding thing before.
The bagpipes and smoked salmon
for 200
and I hated every second of it. Not
with me! You weren't marrying me.
Which is exactly my point.
You know, it's different this time.
Do you know what I would love?
Me and you, sneaking into a registry
office on a Saturday afternoon.
I don't want to sneak anywhere.
I want the whole world to know.
Yeah, I want the world to know too.
I just don't want them all at the
reception.
I'm not doing this for fun,
I'm doing this cos I want everything
to be perfect. And it will be.
I just question
the need for a portcullis.
Oh, come on, don't sulk.
Please?
Let's go to bed.
Let's sleep on it, yeah?
I shouted at this woman on the train
today. Like a nutter.
That's me.
The nutter on the train.
You're tired, that's all.
And it's only Monday.
Let's go out. Just me and you.
Somewhere that's not a parents'
evening or a school play.
I could meet you in London,
get a hotel,
go for dinner, go dancing.
What, in a nightclub?
A special club for old people.
Glen Miller and orthopaedic chairs.
I haven't danced since our wedding.
Ah, the day the music died.
Love you. Love you too.
Argh...
I've told you a million times,
you've got to rinse the plates
before you put them in.
See you later.
That was completely
out of order yesterday.
I really don't want to have
that debate again.
No, me neither. I wanted to
apologise. Oh.
It's this journey, you know,
Especially me on a Monday morning.
Veins popping out of my head,
tingle down my left arm.
I was probably a little abrupt too.
Yeah, you were terrifying.
Quite rightly, though.
It's just you had the Holy Grail -
front-facing,
near the exit, big table. That's
like a lifeboat on the Titanic,
you've got to fight for it.
I'll bear that in mind.
Bye. Bye.
We seem to be walking the same
direction. Yes, we do.
Bit awkward. Yeah.
So how long have you erm...?
Week four.
Was I ever so young, so naive?
So, old-timer,
how long have you been...?
12 years, no parole.
Five weeks off for good behaviour.
Portugal usually.
I'll let you go on. I'll see you
tomorrow, 7:
39.Just don't let me find you in my
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