The Addams Family Page #13

TULLY:

(his eyes gleaming)

What a shame.

Granny and Lurch appear, hawking another of Granny's"delicacies."

GRANNY:

Toad on a stick! Get your red hottoad on a stick! Can't enjoy theshow without your toad on a stick!

A92 INT. FESTER'S ROOM - SAME TIME A92

At his desk now, Fester works with great concentration.

He appears to be building a bomb. He looks at the clock.

He hurries.

CUT TO:

B92 INT. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM - SAME TIME B92

Gomez attempts to schmooze Judge Womack.

GOMEZ:

I was hoping you'd come over andplay a round of golf. Not to bragbut I've got a beautiful littlenine hole pitch-and-putt-set up in

my cemetery.

JUDGE WOMACK:

I'd rather rot in hell.

(CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 65.

B92 CONTINUED:
B92

GOMEZ:

Ahhh... a previous engagement.

He tucks one of his cigars in Judge Womack's breast pocketand heads off to join his family.

CUT TO:

C92 OMITTED C92

92 INT. VARIETY SHOW STAGE - LATER 92

A HALF DOZEN ADORABLE SEVEN YEAR OLDS are on stagesinging "We Are The World." They finish to the enthusiastic

applause of the AUDITORIUM FULL OF PARENTS.

Morticia and Gomez politely join in while Lurch fidgetsand Granny slumps, bored, in her chair.

MORTICIA:

The children are next.

Lurch stops fidgeting and Granny sits up straight.

CUT TO:

A93

INT. BACKSTAGE - SAME TIME A93

Sitting at the make-up mirror, Wednesday and Pugsleyare putting on their armor. Fester is suddenly behindthem, reflected in the mirror.

FESTER:

I changed my mind.

He thrusts a package toward them.

CUT TO:

B93 EXT. ADDAMS HOUSE - SAME TIME B93

Abigail is hammering on the door with the knocker.

ABIGAIL:

(whispering, sweetly)

Gordon... Gordon... it's Mother...

(very harsh, banging

the knocker)

Dammit, where are you! I shouldnever have used him!

She clomps down the porch steps and heads around the sideof the house, peering in windows.

CUT TO:

C93

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/15/91

INT. AUDITORIUM. SAME TIME.

66.

C93

Pushing people aside, Fester forces his way to where hisfamily is seated. They're happy to see him.

GOMEZ:

(whispers)

I knew you couldn't stay away,

old man.

CUT TO:

D93 EXT. ADDAMS MANSION. SAME TIME. D93

Standing on tiptoes, Virginia tries yet another window.

AT HER ANKLES -VINES

snake out from a window well.

around her ankles.

They wrap firmly

She gapes down at them and screams. There's no one to

hear her and no escape.

The vines go taut, preparing to pull her under.

CUT TO:

93 INT. VARIETY SHOW STAGE. A SHORT WHILE LATER. 93

Pugsley and Wednesday in their elaborate costumes aredrawing to the climax of their scene from "Hamlet." As

they duel, they act their little Addams' hearts out.

WEDNESDAY:

How all occasions do inform against me,

and spur my dull revenge! O, from this

time forth, my thoughts be bloody or benothing worth! If I must strike youdead, I will!

Pugsley lands the first blow, slashing Wednesday's arm.

HER SLEEVE RENDS AND BLOOD SPURTS.

PUGSLEY:

A hit, a very palpable hit.

They both press the attack, drawing blood. In a fatal

blow, Pugsley SLASHES WEDNESDAY'S JUGULAR. She makes

horrible GURGLING NOISES. BLOOD SPURTS in arterial

squirts.

WEDNESDAY:

O proud death! What feast is

toward in thine eternal cell?

(CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/15/91 66A.

93 CONTINUED:
93

In a final vengeful moment, Wednesday HACKS AT PUGSLEY'SLEFT ARM, CUTTING IT OFF, SENDING A GUSHER OF BLOOD OUT

OF HIS STUMP. THE ARM DROPS TO THE STAGE AND BOUNCES OFF,

LANDING IN JUDGE WOMACK'S LAP.

(CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90

67.

93

CONTINUED:
93

ONSTAGE -Wednesday

clutches her bleeding throat.

WEDNESDAY:

(gurgles)

Sweet oblivion, open your arms.

Wednesday falls dead.

THE AUDIENCE -sits

perfectly still, jaws agape, deep in shock. An oil

painting. Then...

THE ADDAMS FAMILY -leaps

as one to their feet, applauding wildly.

GOMEZ:

Bravo!

THE LIGHTS ON STAGE COME UP -and

Pugsley and Wednesday bow deeply, accepting their

family's applause.

Fester applauds louder than anybody.

CUT TO:

94 OMITTED 94

and and

A95 A95

B95 INT. WEDNESDAY'S BEDROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT B95

Fester is tucking Wednesday into bed. They are nowdevoted friends.

FESTER:

...there were sailors and pirates,

and an airplane full of touristsfrom Miami Beach. All lost in the

triangle.

WEDNESDAY:

(thrilled)

Uncle Fester, someday will you takeme there?

FESTER:

It's a promise. Goodnight,

Wednesday. You were terrific.

(CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 3/18/91 67A.

B95 CONTINUED:
B95

He kisses her on her forehead. She holds out her headless

doll. Fester kisses the doll's empty neck. Wednesdayholds out the doll's severed head. Fester kisses it.

CUT TO:

C95 INT. CEMETERY - SAME TIME C95

Morticia is standing in the moonlight. Gomez sits on a

bench nearby.

MORTICIA:

What a sublime evening. A

theatrical triumph...

GOMEZ:

A Shakespearean delight! All hail Fester!

MORTICIA:

It's like a dream. When we first met,

years ago, it was an evening much like

this. Magic in the air. A boy...

GOMEZ:

A girl...

MORTICIA:

(nostalgically

sitting beside Gomez)

An open grave... It was my first

funeral.

GOMEZ:

You were so beautiful - pale, and

mysterious. No one even looked at

the corpse.

MORTICIA:

Your cousin, Balthazar. You were

still a suspect. I couldn't stop

staring, all during the eulogy. Your

eyes. Your moustache. Your laugh.

GOMEZ:

(aglow with romance)

You bewitched me. I proposed that

very night.

MORTICIA:

(gazing at the cemetery)

Just think - someday we'll be buried

here. Side by side, six feet under.

In matching coffins. Our lifeless

bodies, rotting together, for all

eternity.

(CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/7/91 67B.

C95 CONTINUED:
C95

GOMEZ:

(aroused by all this)

Cara mia!

MORTICIA:

(passionately)

Mon sauvage!

They embrace in the moonlight. As they do, the cameraPANS above their heads: we see the headstone featuringUNCLE FESTER.

CUT TO:

95

INT. CONSERVATORY - MORNING 95

LURCH -is

sweeping up. Among the plants, he comes upon

ABIGAIL -- tightly wrapped in a plant cocoon.

Lurch growls.

CUT TO:

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 1/18/90 68.

A96 INT. KITCHEN - LATER A96

The cheerful Addams breakfast is underway. Fester is at

the table with the family.

PUGSLEY:

(to Fester)

Did you like the blood?

FESTER:

Perfect - a full bucket. I was so

proud.

MORTICIA:

Weren't we all. Wednesday, play

with your food.

Wednesday has SOMETHING MOVING in her cereal bowl. She

teases it with her fork.

Granny SCREAMS, at the sideboard.

MORTICIA:

Mama?

Granny pulls a SKELETON OF A SHIN AND FOOT out of one ofthe serving dishes.

GRANNY:

Who put this in here?

Pugsley and Fester exchange a conspiratorial glance andgiggle.

GRANNY:

(referring to theskeleton)

That's for company!

GOMEZ:

(shaking his head,

amused)

Rascals.

Abigail enters, peeling off bits of the vines that hadencased her.

GOMEZ:

Doctor! You were so right! What

Rate this script:2.3 / 3 votes