The Adventures of Bullwhip Griffin Page #8

Tell Mr. Trimble how

you knocked out Mountain Ox.

Mr. Trimble is not interested

in technique.

All Mr. Trimble wants is a match.

Right?

- Right.

- [Man] Hey, Sam?

Bullwhip, are you out of your mind?

[Moans] Possibly.

You can't pull that glove trick

in a bareknuckle fight.

- That is not important.

- You wanna get yourself killed?

- Oh...

- [drum roll]

Gentlemen, may I have your attention,

please? An important announcement.

I'm very happy to announce

that the fight of the year

will take place here at the Lucky

Nugget Saloon one week from tonight!

[Cheering]

A boxing match?

No, gentlemen. A grudge fight

for the bareknuckle championship

of San Francisco

between the present undisputed

champion, the Mountain Ox!

[Cheering]

Facing the challenger, the only man

who has ever knocked out the Ox,

the legendary and much-talked-about

Bullwhip Griffin!

[Cheering]

[Sam] Tickets go on sale tomorrow

for those of you who can afford them.

Those of you with heavy pokes,

if you want to sign up now,

go over to the bar.

We'll save some good seats for you.

Bullwhip Griffin?

Do you have even the remotest idea

what you're doing?

I have seen the Mountain Ox take

three men twice the size that you are

- and destroy them.

- He's doing it for money, Arabella,

to send us home.

He doesn't care what happens to him.

- Oh.

- I wouldn't take that.

That's blood money.

What do you think I am?

I know what you are. You are a lady.

You don't belong

in a place like this.

No. And neither do you. Come along.

Come on!

Then he took the glove filled with gold

and he swung it like a blackjack.

My brother Jack

told me the whole story last night.

Why, that shifty little shyster.

He had everybody fooled, even the

poor Ox. He never suspected anything.

So, you see, Sam,

you've got to call it off.

Well, it really doesn't matter.

It may not be much of a fight,

probably won't last long,

but they can't say it's my fault.

Sam? He's not a fighter, he's a butler.

He could get killed.

What are you getting steamed up

about? Why do you need a butler?

Sam. Here's your money back.

Now call the whole thing off.

Call it off? Are you serious?

You and I are in a position

to make some pretty shrewd bets.

We know something that

those men don't know.

Oh. Well, suppose I go out there and

tell them the same story I told you?

- No, I wouldn't do that.

- They wouldn't place their bets.

I imagine they wouldn't

buy tickets for your fight.

Probably not. They'd be too busy

stringing up your butler by the neck.

Honey, a lot of bets have been made.

They'd lynch him before sundown.

Well, you'd better think of something.

Or I quit.

Now, wait a minute, wait a minute. Uh...

Look, I'll have the Ox go easy on him.

You know better than that.

Once the big Ox gets wound up,

there'll be no stopping him.

He'd beat Griffin to a pulp.

Why don't you stay with me? It's

more fun to be on the winning side.

- You are a beast!

- Maybe so.

But remember I'm still your friend

and if you ever want your job back...

I always thought you were

real smart about everything

but this doesn't seem very smart to me.

Master Jack.

Now, I have a feeling that brute force

is not always decisive.

I shall endeavor to combine agility

with a certain basic knowledge

of fisticuffs.

Fortunately, I once read the

Gentlemans Guide to Boxing.

All he'll have to do

is land just one blow.

[Arabella] Griffin?

Griffin? Jack?

I quit my job and sent word

to the captain of the Robert Emmet

to hold places on board for us tonight.

I'm so glad you've come to your senses.

- Yes, well, three places.

- Three places.

There's more than enough

here for the three of us.

We could sneak on board

and we'd be out to sea

before anyone realized you were gone.

Miss Arabella, I couldn't do a thing

like that. I've given my word.

What, to Sam Trimble?

Why, he'd double-cross himself.

Well, even so.

Wouldn't you rather break your word

than break your neck?

Sure.

Well, I am going right down

and book two passages.

You can book as many as you like

'cause I shan't be aboard when it sails.

Neither will I.

Oh, dear.

Well, look, even if you are going to

stay here, you're going to need this.

You go out and get killed

and we spend your money? Don't be silly.

How are you going to live?

You have quit your job.

But I can get my job back.

I will not have you singing in a saloon.

I will not permit it.

- You will not permit it?

- [Griffin] No!

Nor do I wish you to associate with

Sam Trimble. The way he looks at you!

Well, for your information,

I like the way he looks at me.

Master Jack.

Griffin is jealous.

Well, since you insist on going

through with this fight, Griffin,

I guess we're all in it together.

All right, gents.

You all heard what Sam Trimble said.

He's giving 20-1.

20-1, mind you,

on the Mountain Ox to win.

- Joe?

- Yes?

This is the new bookkeeper

to give you a hand.

Good. Start with those pokes.

Weigh 'em out.

- And then put 'em in the safe.

- Don't you worry.

I will take care of everything.

Gents, gents!

Where's your sporting blood?

Get out those heavy pokes.

[Sam] I'm offering 30-1

on the Mountain Ox to win.

[Crowd clamoring]

I sure hope the Mountain Ox

would rather dance than fight.

Very good.

[Arabella] Oh!

[Griffin] Oh!

You know, I haven't quite

figured out how I'm going to win

- merely by staying out of his way.

- For now, let's just concentrate

- on how you're going to survive.

- [Moans]

The first thing I'm going to do

after this is over

is buy three tickets to Boston.

Your best chance with the big Ox

is to get him angry

so he loses his temper

and then he goes berserk.

- I've seen a sample.

- Well, let's get started.

- Fine.

- Come on.

Now, I'll be the Mountain Ox.

- Ready?

- Yeah.

[Grunting]

Mr. Bartlett!

Hey! Wait till Bullwhip sees you!

Desist a moment, dear lad.

They hold the stage.

Let them play out the play.

You didn't hear about what happened to

us, coming back from the gold fields?

No, but let us exchange such tales

within the shadows of this rampart

whilst observing yon gladiators.

This is all we wound up with, but I'm

sure Bullwhip will let you have a third.

Well, thank you,

but by a happy circumstance,

while being pursued by a grizzly bear,

a great hairy beast,

I perchanced to stumble

into a deep hole,

and upon striking the bottom,

struck upon a bed of golden nuggets.

Of course, it is not the mother lode

we share among us.

And yet, uh, who can gain say?

Might it not lead on to equal fortune?

[Arabella] Whoa!

Methinks David and Goliath,

and at 30-1 odds.

Now, let us take our gold

and make haste to the Lucky Nugget.

Don't you want to talk to Bullwhip,

meet Arabella?

There is a tide in the affairs of man,

which, taken at the flood,

leads onto fortune.

Now, let us not tarry

until the tide has turned.

[Grunting]

Oh, Bullwhip...

I'm telling you,

it'll be the fight of the year.

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