The Amazing Digital Circus Page #2

Season #1

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(Intense silence overcomes.)

???:
That's-

(Before the Jester could say anything, the two go back to the grounds.)

Caine:
We stay right here, where I can keep my HUNDREDS OF ALL-SEEING EYES ON YOU!

*stereotypical alien-like music plays*

(Another short-span intense silence, as eyeballs - presumably the ones Caine mentioned - appears behind the two.)

Moon:
Hello, Caine. I love you.

Caine:
Aahhh! Let's get outta here before the Moon gets frisky!

(The camera cuts off to an orange exit door seen on the grounds.)

???:
Wait, what's that-

(Caine, again, warps them to the tent. The Jester pukes black liquid on the floor.)

Caine:
Woah, clean up on aisle you!

(Bubble appears from Caine's hat.)

Bubble:
I'm on it, Boss!

(Bubble proceeds to continuously lick the vomit while Caine seems disturbed.)

Caine:
...Why are you like this?

(The Jester returns to her consciousness)

???:
Wait, wait. Was that an exit door I saw out there? Is that a way to leave?

Jax:
What exit?

(Jax takes off Zooble's arm and scratches it on his back.)

Jax:
If there was a way to leave, I'm pretty sure we’d have all left by now.

(Zooble controls the arm and chokes Jax while talking.)

Zooble:
Yeah, what are you talking about?

(The camera cuts off to Caine still watching Bubble lick the vomit.)

Caine:
Uh-uh-I- *clears throat* I assure you there is no "magical exit door." You're probably just experiencing DIGITAL HALLUCINATIONS! From your mind's transition to the digital plane.

???:
But, I-I swear I saw-

Caine:
DIGITAL HALLUCINATIONS!

(Caine looks like he's stressing out.)

Caine:
...How about we talk about something else? Like your name!

???:
My name? My name is uhh... AAHH! OH, GOD! WHY CAN'T I REMEMBER MY NAME!?

Caine:
Nobody can remember their name once they enter the Digital Circus! One of the few things I don't have control over; are your minds! So all I can help you with is coming up with a new one!

(The Jester's eyes go abstract, again.)

???:
Ugh...what's my name...?

Caine:
Don't you worry your little head. Your new name can be anything!...

*he said patting Pomnis' head*

Caine:
...hereby acknowledging that your chosen name or names may not breach the Digital Circus User License Agreement stating that your name may not include objectionable content. Objectionable content includes - but is not limited to - sexually explicit material, obscene, defamatory, libelous, slanderous, violent, and or unlawful content or profanity. (He said very quickly as if it were a commercial warning)

Caine:
What are you thinkin’?

???:
Huh? I... don't care, just pick anything.

Caine:
Let’s see!

(A slot machine of letters falls and rolls.)

Caine:
What do you think of XDDCC? (Stammering)

???:
I don't-

Caine:
You're right, terrible. Let's try that again!

(The slot machine of letters rolls again)

Caine:
What do you think of POMNI?

???:
Huh? Uhh, sure.. I think I just-

In-house Adventure for Pomni

Caine:
Gadzooks, you're right, Jax! We should have a brand new adventure for our new member, Pomni!

Jax:
I said that, like, 5 minutes ago.

(Caine points to Pomni)

Caine:
You! Do you like adventure? Activity? Wonder? Danger? Horror? Pain? Suffering? Agony? Death? Disease? Death? (says at an abnormally fast pace) Angel food cake? (he says in a regular calm voice)

(Bubble appears and eats the angel food cake Caine had pulled out as he said that line. Caine looks at Bubble, saddened and distraught.)

Caine:
You PARASITE! (he yells angrily) *pops Bubble*

Pomni:
Uh- I don't really-

Caine:
Since you're new around here, we're gonna make it a simple, in-house, adventure to warm you up to how things work around here.

Zooble:
What? No, god! I don't want an in-house adventure!

Caine:
Don't worry, Zooble. I'll make it something unobtrusive that you can still choose to not get involved with!

Caine:
Today's adventure is... Gather the Gloinks!

Caine:
Hahahahah! AHAHAHAHA! HAHA! HAHa-

(Caine laughs maniacally. He is cut off as he starts saying the next lines.)

Caine:
That's right! The entire circus tent will be infested with Gloinks, and you gotta catch 'em all!

Bubble:
But what are they?

Caine:
I'm glad You asked, Bubble, they're small-

Bubble:
And what do they do?

Caine:
They-

Bubble:
And how do they-

(Caine pops Bubble.)

Caine:
Gloinks are small mischievous critters that steal anything and everything they run into! Why do these humanoid hashbrowns do this? How do you stop them? That's for you to find out. Now, good luck, and have fun, my little superstars!

(Caine disappears.)

Pomni:
...What did any of that mean?

Ragatha:
Oh, that's just one of Caine's little adventures. They're just... something fun to do to, you know, prevent us from going insane. (nervous chuckle)

Zooble:
*sigh* Speak for yourself. If anyone needs me, then %$!# off. (Zooble pulls the middle finger, which is also censored.)

(Gloinks appear and steal Zooble's body parts}

Zooble:
Oh God, oh jeez, NO! OH GOD! SOMEBODY HELP!

(Gangle gasps and Jax begins to be sarcastic)

Jax:
Oh no, they killed Zooble. Anyway, you guys wanna go get something to eat?

Ragatha:
...Oh wait, we should go check on Kaufmo! I'm pretty sure he'd like to meet Pomni!

(The Gloinks steal Kingers' "Impenetrable Fortress", which was his aforementioned pillow fort)

Kinger:
MY IMPENETRABLE FORTRESS!!

Ragatha:
You wanna come with us to check on Kaufmo?

Kinger:
No, not really. I think Kaufmo's gone insane. Last time I spoke with him, he was rambling endlessly about some exit. Kind of like you, Pomni! You might be going insane too.

Pomni:
BUT WAIT! Wouldn't that more likely mean the exit DOES exist?

Jax:
Could also mean that you just have a jumpstart on losing your mind?

(Gangle speaks from far away, making her voice softer)

Gangle:
Wait! What about Zooble!?

Pomni:
Well, I think I'd like to ask him about it, IF this was real, which it isn't, because it’s a dream.

Jax:
Heh, she still thinks this is a dream.

Ragatha:
Uhh... why are you looking at me like that?

Jax:
I'm fine with doing whatever, as long as I get to see funny things happening to people!

(A gloink smacks Jax)

Jax:
Ow! Okay, I've already had enough of these things. *sigh* You, me, and Pomni will go check on Kaufmo, which leaves crybaby (Gangle) and hoo-ha (Kinger) together to go handle the Zooble situation.

Ragatha:
*laughs unsurely* Haha, do you think pairing them up together is a good idea?

Jax:
Of course I do. They're the two most mentally stable and capable characters to be paired together.

(As Jax is saying this, Kinger starts to shake violently)

Jax:
Come on, ladies, let's go harass the clown.

(Pomni and Ragatha follow Jax)

Gangle:
My comedy mask is broken again...

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