The Ant Bully Page #4

Nice.

Oh, why did Mom

have to get *** carpet?

lt'll take days to get to the kitchen.

Oh, gee, that is too bad.

I guess now we'll have to go home

before we all get in trouble.

No.

Wait.

Come on.

This is called hang-gliding.

Have you ever done this, actually?

I played the video game.

Now, when I give the word,

everybody jump.

Now.

Oh, sorry, was that the word?

-Coming.

-Hey, hey, look out.

For queen and colony.

Oh, God.

-Showoff.

-Awesome. Yeah.

This is Hawaii.

We went there last summer.

It's got volcanoes and hula dancers

and Don Ho and surfboards.

And I caught a fish.

And these are the pyramids.

Well, not the real pyramids.

The real ones are lots bigger.

Mommo says aliens built them.

She's my grandma.

Oh, are these your nest mates?

Yeah, that's my family.

Which one's the queen?

My sister thinks she is.

What's wrong?

Nothing. It's just, well....

I should have told

my mom goodbye. That's all.

I can be a real jerk sometimes.

-Lucas, your face is leaking.

-Leaking?

Oh, no, it's okay.

Is that what humans do

when they're sad?

They leak from the face?

When ants are sad, we do this:

Oh, Lucas, it's-- It's--

It's beautiful!

Sweet rocks, come to papa!

Red one.

What are you doing?

Why aren't you taking the red ones?

Well, it's actually

quite simple, sugar lips.

I hate the red ones.

Well, I love the red ones.

-Hate them.

-I love them!

-Hate, hate, hate.

-Love. Love.

-Admit it, you find me attractive.

-What?

Oh, how you tease me

with your sweet talk.

Oh, you want some sweet talk?

Because I'll give you some sweet talk.

Now grab a red one

before I pull these off.

Whoa, I need those.

What are we doing?

Nothing, nothing.

-Mommo, I'm back!

-What was that?

-Tiffany.

-What's a Tiffany?

-Hurry up!

-Right.

Leave the red ones behind!

Fugax!

Hey, pipsqueak, you there?

Hello?

Crossfire!

That kid and his stupid electronic toys.

What is he doing?

Jumping. You know,

hippity hop, uppity downy?

It's a scout thing.

You wouldn't understand.

Okay, come on. One more.

I just need a seven.

-Hello. How are you?

-Hi.

Pizza Kingdom. Hail to the king.

Would you like to try our new

Princess Pepperoni with tangy Jester Sauce?

Hello! This is Lucas Nickle!

I need to cancel my order!

What?

You don't want to order?

Please cancel the contract!

-No exterminator!

-No extra tomato. Got it.

Yes. No exterminator.

I'm canceling the contract.

What? You-- You wanna cancel?

Who is this?

Oh, Bill, is this you, man?

You got me, man. You got me, dude.

That's a relief.

Okay, Lucas, I don't understand

most of what just happened.

What is an exterminator?

Oh, don't worry. Everything's okay now.

Hide!

This is Tiff. Hi, Mom.

Yeah, everything's fine.

Lucas is being a pest.

He's in his room playing...

-...those stupid video games.

-No, no!

I will. I will. Okay, Mom.

Yes. I'm hugging the phone too. Bye.

You must be Queen Tiffany.

Allow me to introduce--

Remember your training.

Oh, no. No, no, no! Mother!

We're sorry. Your call

cannot be completed as dialed.

Hello?

Tiffany, no! You'll squish Lucas.

Hello. Nobody's shrunk.

Gotta go. Bye-bye.

What are you talking about?

Lucas! You let him go. It's me you want.

Come back. Probe me instead. Lucas!

Bring back Lucas, you alien ***!

Oh, Lucas. Lucas.

-Okay, Mommo.

-Lucas.

Let's go find your other teeth.

Hova, where are you?

Hova? Hova! Are you all right?

Are we all right? Of course.

Why wouldn't we be?

We're fine. We're all right. Silly.

Whoa, whoa, wait.

No, wait, now, hold up.

Zoc! Zoc, guess what we did?

We went to Hawaii.

We saw the pyramids.

We flew without wings.

At first, it was like:

But then it was:

Of course, the others were terrified,

so I took charge. And then we....

We were inside the humans' nest.

Humans' nest? That's forbidden!

Right, right.

But the nest was filled

with sweet rocks, okay.

Lots of them.

But then Queen Tiffany started swatting,

some massive flying teeth attacked us...

...and, well, here we are.

What a day. Good night.

And who told you

about these sweet rocks?

-Lucas, of course.

-Really?

Hi, there. How are you?

-Okay.

-Okay. That's good.

It's good to be okay.

Listen, I just wanted

to show you something, if that's okay.

You know what this is?

This is the potion that will

make you big again.

I just wanted you to take

a good, long look at it.

Because this is the last time

you will ever see it.

What do you mean?

I mean, there is no way I am ever

going to make you big again.

Ever. You are a threat

to every ant in this colony.

Especially to Hova.

But I would never do anything

to hurt Hova.

I just-- l--

I just wanna go home.

Well, then, if I were you...

...l'd try to find help somewhere else,

because there is nothing for you here.

Nothing.

The pain, the pain! It's unbearable.

Just put me out of my misery!

Oh, hold still, you big pupa.

I haven't even touched you yet.

Be gentle with me.

-Where's Lucas?

-Isn't he with you?

-No.

-Lucas? Lucas? That's weird.

Well, he's probably off destroying

some other poor, unfortunate colony.

You know how they are. Destroyers.

Zoc, what have you done?

-Me? What did I do?

-Where is he?

He's gone.

-He led you into a trap, Hova.

-There was no trap.

He led us to food.

He was trying to protect us from....

-From what? What, Hova?

-From something.

Oh, something!

And I was worried it was from nothing.

He's blinded you, Hova.

No, you are the one who's blind.

You are so consumed

by your hatred for the humans...

-...you see only what you want to see.

-Oh, come on.

Zoc, I see a young pupa,

a human learning our ways...

...becoming part of this colony,

becoming an ant.

-Impossible.

-Listen to yourself, Zoc.

"A wizard knows no such word."

So, what are you now?

Certainly not the ant I love.

Hova!

I did it for you, for the colony.

You did it for yourself.

Hova, I....

He won't make it

through the night alone.

Fugax, your leg's broken.

Yeah, but I still have five good ones.

Very good ones.

You know, I believe he was trying

to protect us from something.

See you, Zoc.

Maybe Zoc is right.

Now I'll never get home.

Hi! Nice evening, huh?

Oh, may I?

Sure, help yourself.

Thanks, I love water! I'm a beetle

that loves water, but I'm not a water beetle.

Isn't that funny? I'm a beetle--

Hey, Lucas.

Hey, anybody know what...means?

I think I just figured it out.

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