The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford Page #7

- So you missed me?

- Oh, yeah.

I been crying myself to sleep every night.

Don't let him see us so much as wink.

He's suspicious as a damn coyote,

and he don't trust you one iota.

- Well, I guess that makes...

- Hey.

He already put away Ed Miller. He said so

like it was something piddly he'd done.

If we're ever alone for more than a minute,

I'd like a chance to talk to you further.

They gave me ten days.

For what?

For arresting him.

You and me, huh?

It's gonna happen one way or another,

Charley. It's gonna happen.

So it might as well be us

who get rich on it.

- Bob, he's our friend.

- He murdered Ed Miller.

And he's gonna murder Liddil and Cummins

if the chance ever comes.

It seems to me Jesse's riding from

man to man, saying goodbye to the gang.

So your friendship could put you

under the pansies.

I'll grind it fine in my mind, Bob. I can't

go any further than that right now.

You'll come around.

You think it's all made up, don't you?

You think it's all yarns

and newspaper stories.

He's just a human being.

From now on, you two

won't go anywhere without me.

From now on, you'll ask for my permission!

From now on, you'll ask to be excused!

Charley, take them horses

around the barn. Bob, you go on inside.

- Hello, Mary.

- Hi.

Look at this rotten parsnip

I found in the compost heap.

You never mentioned Bob would be here.

Maybe he was saving it

as a pleasant surprise.

Got two cousins for company now.

How it's gonna be is...

...we'll leave next Monday afternoon

and ride down to Platte City.

How far is that from Kansas City?

Platte City's 30 miles south.

You and me and Charley'll

sleep in the woods overnight...

...and we'll strike the Wells Bank

sometime before the court recesses.

What time will that be exactly?

Well, you don't need to know that.

You know, I'm real comfortable

with your brother.

Hell, he's ugly as sin,

he smells like a skunk...

...and he's so ignorant

he couldn't drive nails in the snow...

...but he's sort of easy to be around.

I can't say the same for you, Bob.

Well, I'm sorry to hear you say that.

You know how it is when you're

with your girlfriend and the moon's out...

...and you know she wants to be kissed,

even though she never said so?

Yeah.

Well, you're giving me signs

that grieve my soul...

...and make me wonder...

...maybe your mind's

been changed about me.

Well, what do you want me to do?

Swear my good faith on the Bible?

You two having a spat?

I was getting ready to be angry.

Sit over here closer, kid.

Come on.

Charley, you'll stay with the animals.

Me and the kid...

...will walk into that bank

just before noon.

Bob will move that cashier...

...away from the shotgun

that's under the counter...

...and I'll creep up behind that cashier...

...and I'll cock his head back like so.

And I'll say:

"How come an off-scouring

like you is still sucking air...

...when so many of mine

are in coffins?" I'll say:

"How did you get to reach 20

without leaking out all over your clothes?"

And if I don't like his attitude,

I will slit that phildoodle so deep...

...he will flop on the floor like a fish.

My God, what just happened?

Boy, I could hear your gears grinding...

...hear your little motor wondering,

"My gosh, what's next?

What's happening to me?"

You were precious to behold, Bob.

You were white as spit in a cotton field.

You got him. You got him.

You wanna know how that feels?

Unpleasant. I honestly can't recommend it.

The old Charley looked stricken!

I was. I was.

"This is plumb unexpected," old Charley

was thinking."That done ruined my day."

Hell. Hell.

Jesse slept with Bob

in the children's room that night.

And Bob remained awake.

He could see that there was a gun

on the nightstand.

He could imagine its cold nickel

inside his grip...

...its two-pound weight

reached out and aimed.

I need to go to the privy.

You think you do, but you don't.

You wait for grace, now.

- Thank you, Mama.

- Thank you, Zee. God, that looks good.

- Thank you, Zee.

- You're welcome.

Well, is this fit to eat or will it just do?

Woman's cooking's

always been a scandal.

Cut her meat and the whole table moves.

You want a biscuit?

You gonna have a biscuit?

Here's some butter.

Come on. Come on.

Oh, shoot.

And so it went,

Jesse was increasingly cavalier...

...merry, moody, fey...

...unpredictable.

He camouflaged his depressions

and derangements...

...with masquerades

of extreme cordiality, courtesy...

...and goodwill towards others.

But even as he jested,

or tickled his boy in the ribs...

...Jesse would look over at Bob

with melancholy eyes...

...as if the two were meshed

in an intimate communication.

Bob was certain that the man

had unriddled him...

...had seen through his reasons

for coming along...

...that Jesse could forecast each of

Bob's possible moves and inclinations...

...and was only acting the innocent...

...in order to lull Bob

into stupid tranquility and miscalculation.

How long you been studying me?

You're gonna break a lot of hearts.

How do you mean?

It's a present.

It's heavy.

Well, you gonna look inside?

It's April Fools' Day, you know.

It ain't no joke.

Oh, such extravagance.

Don't that nickel just shine, though?

It's more than I could hope for.

I figured that granddaddy Colt

may blow into fragments...

...next time you try

to squeeze the trigger.

Well, you might have something there.

Tom, supper's ready.

I'll be right there, sweetheart.

I might be too excited to eat.

You know what John Newman Edwards

once wrote about me?

He said I didn't trust

two men in 10,000...

...and even them I was cautious around.

Government's sort of run me ragged.

I'm going the long way around the barn

to say that...

...I been feeling cornered

and just plain ornery as of late...

...and I'd be pleased if you'd accept

that gun as my way of apologizing.

Heaven knows I'd be ornerier

if I were in your position.

No. No, I haven't been acting correctly.

Seems I hardly recognize myself

when I'm greased.

I go on journeys out of my body...

...and look at my red hands

and my mean face...

...and I wonder about that man

that's gone so wrong.

I've been becoming a problem to myself.

Well...

- I better wash my hands if supper's on.

- Yeah, go ahead.

The day before he died was Palm Sunday.

And Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Howard,

their two children...

...and their cousin Charles Johnson...

...strolled to the Second Presbyterian

Church to attend the 10:00 service.

Bob remained at the cottage...

...and slyly migrated from room to room.

He walked into the master bedroom...

...and inventoried the clothes

on the hangers and hooks.

He sipped from the water glass

on the vanity.

He smelled the talcum and lilacs

on Jesse's pillowcase.

His fingers skittered over his ribs...

...to construe the scars

where Jesse was twice shot.

He manufactured a middle finger

that was missing the top two knuckles.

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