The Astronaut Farmer Page #3

I believe there are four entrances

to the property. Four entrances.

I don't know if they're gated or not.

Suspect has been trying

to secure rocket fuel, over.

Roger, we copy.

Miller is about 100 yards out.

You should be able to see him.

He's coming down the hill, over.

Be aware there are seven suspects. We have

on visual suspect, one Jesus Garcia.

We copy that.

Killbourne, Mathis,

currently securing the barn.

Can I help you?

- Charles Farmer?

- Yeah.

We're with the Federal Bureau

of Investigation.

Sir, we have been made aware,

through electronic documents...

...that you have been searching

for a high-grade fuel commonly used...

...to launch rockets.

Are you aware that you have an illegal

alien working on your premises?

Pepe Garcia. Jesus Garcia.

If you cooperate, we could see to it...

...that Mr. Garcia

could stay here with your family.

We're going to the moon.

- That's really rotten.

- It's rather generous of us.

And where is that man going?

It's very simple, Mr. Farmer...

...it's illegal to try to obtain

such a high-grade fuel for private use.

Anyone trying to acquire this kind of fuel

has to be considered a threat.

This is the real deal.

- Well, I'm no threat.

- Well, how do we know...

- ...you're not building a warhead?

- Because I'm not at war.

We just wanna let you know

your little rocket ain't gonna fly...

...as long as we're doing

this investigation.

Yeah.

I filled out the FAA application,

sent it in over six months ago.

Sent all my flight plans,

illustrations of the vessel...

...never heard anything back

saying I couldn't launch.

They didn't think you were serious.

- Well, how can they stop me now?

- Jeez, Farmer.

With this Patriot Act, the way

they've twisted the laws up so much...

...they can do whatever

they please...

...as long as they feel you're a threat

to homeland security.

What do you want me to do?

Well, twist it some more.

Isn't that what lawyers are good at?

All right. Did they say they were

gonna press any charges?

Well, no, not exactly.

They said I'm under investigation.

That means they're gonna

be watching your every move.

Yeah.

I got a buddy in Manhattan.

He's a partner in one of these big firms

that specializes in cases like this.

- Give it a try.

- Maybe he can...

...shed some light on the situation.

He owes me a favor.

It won't cost you a nickel.

Set it up. Grab the boom.

Going into space

doesn't take NASA anymore.

Friends, we are here at the entrance

of the space cowboy's ranch.

We are told that behind me,

in this barn, is a rocket...

...a rocket that Charles Farmer

wants to launch into outer space.

After graduating

from Meriwether Lewis High School...

...he continued his education

at the University of Texas...

...where he received a degree

in aerospace engineering.

Soon after, Charles Farmer

enlisted in the Air Force...

...where he developed his skills as a pilot,

flying such planes as the F-4 Phantom.

The rocketeer Charles Farmer

was in fact training to be an astronaut...

...before he was discharged

from the military.

- Hello.

- Hey, what's up?

Holy cow, Munchak.

You didn't tell me your friend was CNN.

This is what he said.

He said embrace the media, Farmer.

Invite them in.

They're for your protection.

You want them on your side, Farmer.

All right.

He built the rocket.

I'm sure he built a retractable roof.

- Really?

- I don't think he'd build a rocket...

...and forget about the roof.

- Unless he never plans on launching it.

- Then why are we here?

Because if we aren't here,

and he launches...

...we're gonna look like asses.

And if he does, and we are here?

We still look like asses.

- There he is!

- Mr. Farmer!

Mr. Farmer, quick question.

Listen, if you guys settle down

and ask your questions one at a time...

...I'll answer them

to the best of my ability.

Is it important to you that people know

the importance of space travel?

I'll put it to you this way.

There are a lot of people in this world...

...that think Michael Jackson

had the first moonwalk.

Mr. Farmer, when do you plan

on launching your rocket?

- Soon.

- Mr. Farmer, why are you doing this?

It's always been my dream.

The rocket is huge. It's really big.

He's more of an astro-nut.

- Who was it?

- My wife.

She wants an autograph.

You hear about this? There's a guy in Texas

building his own rocket in his back yard.

This guy is planning

on launching himself into orbit.

Here's my question.

Wouldn't it be easier just to say:

"Honey, I want a divorce"?

Okay, wouldn't that be--?

That's not very funny.

Looks like a really beautiful day today.

Afternoon high of 65,

down to 35 tonight.

- Morning, Hal.

- And if you're launching a rocket...

...the weather looks really good

over most of the country.

This is what's known

as the rocket graveyard.

Farmer gathered most of what he needed

from places like this.

If you're looking to build a rocket,

this is the place to start.

Farmer's rocket is housed

in the barn that you're seeing below.

Due to the overwhelming interest,

he has opened his barn to the public...

...allowing them

to view the rocket themselves...

...only hoping to alleviate

some of this congestion.

Can he do it? Well, sure he can.

Now, will he do it? That's to be seen.

There are lots of FAA regulations...

...that keep people from turning

the sky into a playground.

But the astronaut's plans

for space travel...

...first have to be approved by the FAA.

A hearing has been scheduled.

How long will the government

not allow you to launch your rocket?

- They're not stopping me.

- Is it true...

...Elton John plans to re-release

"Rocket Man" to help raise money?

This is exactly

what we didn't want to happen.

Let's get what we can on this guy.

Find something.

We gotta get this space cowboy's

head out of the clouds.

Pack up, boys. We're going to Texas.

Well, the man deserves a second chance.

All right, more presents.

That's the last of it.

Hey, Stanley.

Why don't you change your hamster cage?

Use paper--

Now, wait a minute. I'd like to see that.

Come on, let me have a look.

Don't believe everything you read,

honey. It just...

- I wanna read it.

- I wish she had your paper, Pepe.

She can't read Spanish.

Your dad's right.

- Change your hamster cage.

- Okay.

They called us a cult. They said we were

like a branch of the Moonies or something.

They think our family's

a bunch of space cadets.

I know. I know.

- How can they do that?

- Because they can.

We are a normal family. We need

to go tell everyone that it isn't true.

Well, honey, we just need

to show them, okay?

We got a winner here. It's a winner!

Hey, here you go, bud.

That's what I get?

Don't you worry about them.

Just forget about them, Charles.

- Thank you.

- For what, baby?

For this.

Excuse me. I wanna talk to you

about the ride.

Two tickets.

No, sir. I mean, if I wanted to buy this ride

from you, how much would it cost me?

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