The Bannen Way

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I got a little riddle for you.

Who's 6'2", smokes like a chimney,

likes to steaI and is currently totally f***ed?

You guessed it. Me.

NeaI Bannen.

My father always called me a quitter.

I had to live with that my whole life.

Now, you've probably got a lot of questions.

Like, why is he f***ed?

Why is he smoking

in a Nicotine Anonymous meeting?

And who is that?

So, that's Madison, by the way,

and we'll get to her

and why she's got my wallet a little later.

For now, just know that I had every intention

of getting out of the criminaI lifestyle.

My friends in the back. We welcome you.

Maybe some new friends.

So I'm guessing you don't have

- the 150 G's to pay Sonny.

- Where's the f***ing money, Bannen?

That's why you're pretending

like you don't see us

- when we're chasing you all over the city.

- Now you can beg for mercy.

Not exactly, guys.

Kill me if you want,

but if you give me a week,

I'll give you an extra 100 G's.

Wait, wait, wait, hold on.

I'm getting way ahead of myself here.

So I should probably mention that the goons

work for the notorious prison gangster

Sonny Carr, who I owe a little money to.

Don't let his Latin flair fooI you.

He will shoot you in the face.

Let me back up a bit.

We got the studio loft job,

hot chick that works at front desk,

Mr. B trying to hunt me down.

Right, this is probably a good time

to bring up Mr. B

and how I used to work for him

before I went freelance.

He's a man of many virtues.

Patience isn't one of them.

Anyway, I'm trying to triple my money...

Right, so here we are at the beginning.

I had 50 G's to my name,

but I owed Sonny 150. Today.

I had one last job lined up but I figured,

hey, why not play a little cards,

triple my money,

and then pay off my debts

the honorable way?

In these situations,

I always think of Grandpa's principles,

which he liked to call the Bannen Way.

Let me give you an example.

I know what you're thinking,

"If you owe Sonny 150,000

and you've got that in your hands,

"you should probably quit. "

But, hey, we're all human.

I'm all in.

Hey, Bannen, it's Zeke.

Where the hell are you?

Did you forget we have our last job today?

Get down to the studio complex downtown,

all right?

- It's D-day, Zeke, and we're a little short.

- What are you talking about?

We've got two seconds flat

to pull off this job

and you're talking to me about short?

I had kings.

What was I supposed to do, fold?

I'm here. Let's just visualize the game plan.

All right, let's do this.

When you get in the lobby,

you're gonna convince the manager

- to give you the key to Haskell's studio loft.

- So I'm impersonating this Haskell guy?

Right. Go out the back.

On your left will be a building.

Down the hall, and you're looking for J345.

You're gonna look for a laptop on a desk.

You take care of the transfer,

I'll take care of the rest.

Hey, Bannen, I know you said

we were done working for Mr. B, but...

You're seriously bringing up

Mr. B right now?

All right, yeah. Don't get all yelly at me.

- I just thought that maybe he could help.

- Not an option.

Roger that.

All right, we'll just focus on the studio job.

Do you have your video feed glasses?

And roger that.

- All right, work your magic, Bannen.

- Sorry.

Sh*t.

Sh*t!

- Hello.

- What happened to the regular manager?

- Hi.

- I seem to have lost my key.

I must have left it in my...

Jesus. Those eyes.

- Let me just verify your info.

- Okay, tell her your name is Allen Haskell.

Haskell, Allen.

A- L-L-E-N.

Can I get a date? Of birth?

- Keep your pants on, Bannen. It's 4-22-47.

- Sure.

-4-22-47.

- You look fantastic for 60, by the way.

Unfortunately, we don't have any spare keys.

What? No. She's new.

She doesn't know what she's talking about.

But I do have the master key.

No, no, no, no! That is not an option.

Tell her to look in the drawer.

Should I escort you myself?

"No, thank you, ma'am,

but if you'll just check the desk drawer... "

- Tell her that, Bannen.

- Okay.

Okay? It's not okay! It's not okay at all!

You need to focus. Please listen to me.

Oh, God, Bannen, we have a job to do.

You're going to blow this whole job.

You will not engage with this girI.

Okay, all right, now that she's let you in,

you will say, "Thank you and good day,"

but you will not engage!

All right, just listen to me, NeaI Bannen.

All right? We have a job to do.

Do not, I repeat, do not...

Oh, God. He engaged.

Hey. Okay, Bannen...

Bannen, I need you to focus right now.

Find the laptop.

We have a small window of time here.

I have some quick business to do.

Oh, God. One second, one second.

- Dude, get in here.

- Go! Get out! Get out!

Bannen, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Okay, go to the accounts folder. That's it.

That's it right there.

Now, set up the transfer to the externaI

and I'll take care of the rest, all right?

- Looks like there's two more accounts.

- No, no, no. No other accounts, Bannen.

There's only one unsecured. All right?

We don't have time for other accounts.

I don't care. Let's do it.

Bannen, how about this? Get the 100,000.

All right, Bannen, remember

what your grandfather used to say,

"A winner knows when to quit,

a loser quits too early or too late,"

as in quit having sex now!

All right, if you go for

more than one account,

they're gonna freeze all three

and we're gonna wind up with nothing.

Sh*t! Haskell just entered the building.

Bannen, I need to know

if we're going after the one account.

We're just going after the one account.

- Yeah.

- Yeah!

Is that a "yeah" to me on the one account

or to the girl?

- Yes!

- Okay. Now, B, get out of there now!

He's walking down the hall!

He's walking down the hall!

Please, please get out of there right now,

all right? This isn't funny, man.

Get out of there right now! Please get out!

Go, go, go!

- Yes!

- Yeah!

- Dirty boy!

- Yeah!

Allen!

Transfer is complete.

On both our ends.

Thanks, bro.

Biggest pimp ever.

Hey, Neal.

Get in. Your uncle wants to talk to you.

When a mob guy probes you for answers,

you gotta watch what you say.

When he's your uncle, well, same deaI,

just slightly more uncomfortable.

I understand you've gotten yourself

in a bit of trouble with Sonny.

- Nothing I can't handle.

- Manni, have Veronica join us.

Drink?

Yeah, the old falling off the wagon thing.

I've never seen this shot

with you and my folks.

Happier times.

Now, you should know this.

As a rule, I don't go to anybody.

I make them come to me.

That was another one

of Granddad's principles.

So next time I call,

answer the goddamn phone.

I'm better with texting.

Your charm has really run out, though,

with your friend Sonny.

If it was up to him,

you'd be floating in the river.

What do you owe him?

Would $250,000 cover it?

How about 500?

Let's just make it the American dream.

$1,000,000.

Neal Bannen, millionaire.

I'm offering you a chance

to square your debt.

Maybe a little place in the Bahamas,

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