The Barbarian Invasions

to my daughter MingXia

London, 2:
30 p.m.

- Hi, Mom.

- Hi, dear.

l have bad news.

Montreal, 9:
30 a.m.

Your dad's prognosis isn't good.

You have to come.

Did he ask you to call?

Not in so many words.

We saw each other

for 1 5 minutes last summer.

We had nothing to say.

With his flat, bank account,

insurance, the university...

Your sister's in Australia.

lt's too much for me.

l'll see if Galle can come.

London, 2:
35 p.m.

Hi, love.

He's worse?

- l have to be there.

l'll come.

You don't have to come.

l've warned you

you'll never get rid of me.

- Do you hear me complaining?

- You better not.

Seeing it's Monday morning,

l'll give you five minutes to get them.

We're now starting the aerobics,

so get moving.

We'll start with jogging

on the spot.

Because l loved you.

You'll never understand that.

Women aren't afraid to love.

We commit ourselves.

We don't forever lie

and shun responsibility!

l wasted four years of my life

waiting for you!

The best years of my life!

Good luck finding another woman like me!

Careful. He's very ill.

l don't care!

We're talking about my life here!

And what do l have to show for it?

Nothing!

lf at least you'd pleasured me.

Because l've got news for you, darling.

You're not equipped to pleasure anyone!

l don't want to bruise your ego,

but l've had better.

My performance in bed with you

was Oscar-worthy!

But you never doubted it, did you?

No, never.

Never, never, never!

- Ow.

- Oh, no you don't!

That's too easy.

Cheating on me for four years

with Sylviane Dupuis, Ginette Mongrain,

Mireille Ttrault!

That woman weighs a ton!

Ginette Mongrain?

Yes! You don't remember

your own mistresses?

You've had too many.

- Ginette Mongrain...

Ginette Mongrain.

The string bean from Olivieri's.

- l never slept with her.

- She told me herself.

At least have the guts to admit it!

- She told you that?

- Damn right.

l swear...

l don't remember.

THE BARBARlAN lNVASlONS

The body of Christ.

Amen.

Have a good day.

The body of Christ.

The communion's over here.

The body of Christ.

Amen.

On the way back, perhaps?

And there you have it!

What a comeback!

How's Mr. Desmarais?

l don't know.

l'm not Mr. Desmarais.

Sorry, the computer system

is a mess.

Constance Lazure.

My wife, Louise.

Must be hard having him here.

l threw him out 1 5 years ago.

So whether he's here

or humping co-eds in his condo...

Gimme a break.

You know it's been years

since l humped a co-ed.

And Raphalle Metellus?

She was Dominique's student,

not mine.

You were her personal tutor?

"Kneel down, open wide.

Careful, don't bite!"

l'd best continue my rounds.

Have a good day!

You too, Sister.

Goodbye!

l called Sbastien

to let him know.

- You did?

- He's coming.

l see.

Aren't you glad?

Lovely, we can play

his video games.

He's still young.

OK, but couldn't he have read

one book in his life?

Any book?

ls that asking too much?

He may not read, but he earns

more in a month than you in a year.

Thanks a lot.

That's OK, we had room.

lt's flying to Belfast Monday...

l'll probably

have to stay longer.

- The British Museum?

- No, it's in the National Gallery.

ln the basement.

- The Trafalgar Square Museum, right?

Yes, exactly.

My darling!

You must be exhausted.

What time is it for you?

Galle, how are you, dear?

Fine, thank you.

Hello, sir.

Young man.

You remember Galle?

Galle is unforgettable.

Hello, sir.

How are you?

No private rooms?

l'm lucky l'm not in the hall.

l tried,

all l got was voice mail.

What's going on over here?

l guess you're fixing the wiring.

What the...?

Hey, hey, hey.

There must be private rooms

available?

Private rooms were abolished

What you mean, abolished?

Excuse me.

My TV's on the fritz.

There's nothing l can do, sir.

Maybe so, but my shows are on

in two minutes.

The TVs are managed

by a private company. Call tomorrow.

What? Tomorrow!

What am l supposed to do tonight?

l don't know, sir!

Not here. Look over there.

- Do you know anything about TVs?

- No.

There was something else

l wanted to ask you.

l've been on duty for 1 2 hours

without a break.

l'm doing three people's work.

So go bother someone else.

Madam. Madam?

Can l see

my father's medical chart?

Later. l'm too busy right now.

Later.

l managed to find his chart.

l'll scan it for you upstairs.

l can't look at it right now,

old buddy, 'cause l'm at a ball.

Yes, my friend, the Baltimore

Museum of Art's annual ball.

Worse yet, l think Allison

will make me dance.

l'll look at it first thing tomorrow

and call you back, OK?

"Dad's very sick.

Please get in touch."

"Message sent to

lt's a cable problem.

There's no signal, sir.

Oh. Then fix the cable.

l can't touch the cable, sir.

Why not?

We just handle the TVs.

Videotron handles cable.

You have to call them.

They'll never come,

they're practically bankrupt.

File a complaint.

- Who with?

- l don't know. The head office.

The head office?

Where's that?

Hey, l don't have time for that!

l have a life, you know!

Television is a right!

l loved you so.

l don't understand, Rmy.

l don't understand

your fear of commitment.

But l don't blame you.

You were always afraid

of responsibility.

That's just the way you were.

l never wanted to change you.

Three years is a long time to wait,

you know.

The best years of my life.

What l see isn't encouraging.

But to be sure

l need a PET scan.

See if they can do it.

They can send it by satellite.

The saddest part is...

that l always remained,

how should l put it,

sexually unfulfilled.

l'm not trying

to make you feel guilty.

Positron Emission Tomography.

Sherbrooke has one,

but there's a 6-to-1 2-month waiting list.

Don't even try.

lsn't he going to Burlington today?

- Yes.

They have one, but it's expensive.

$2,000 U.S.

Cash or plastic.

- Money's no problem.

You're lucky.

Yeah.

You never listened to my body.

But l'm not laying a guilt...

Look, l have to get dressed.

Stop running away!

An ambulance is taking me

to Burlington in 1 0 minutes.

No more excuses!

- For my radiation therapy.

- No!

The machines here are too old.

Stop avoiding me,

it's too painful.

This is my son, Sbastien,

he's going with me.

She's...

a woman l used to know,

long ago.

l couldn't face coming alone.

You've never been here?

Never.

But you see each other

regularly.

Always on neutral ground.

Usually in restaurants.

Did he come to your place?

Occasionally.

But you never came here.

No. This was where

he brought his mistresses.

With luck,

we'll find some panties.

l'm glad Sbastien's

going with him today.

lt's important they talk.

Rmy left 1 5 years ago.

Back then, l was sure

l'd find someone else soon.

l gave myself a year, two, max.

l was still young, and fairly cute.

But l never found anyone.

l've bedded a few men -

that's not so hard to find -

but they were already married,

or had problems.

Or they were just plain dirty.

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