The Barber Page #3

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You know what he did?

He shot himself in the f***ing head.

John said he was killed in the line.

Yeah, well, I guess our boy has a distorted

view of the past, doesn't he?

No, I need to bring him back.

He's off the f***ing payroll.

He's off the goddamn reservation.

He's a loose cannon.

Look, kid, I know that he had a rough time,

but he has made his choice, Audrey,

and if you go after him,

then you're off my ranks, too.

The way it is, kid.

Last bell's rung. Tardy.

How'd you get in here?

Grace, the manager,

we go to the same church.

Where'd you get that?

This? From a cop.

He gave it to you?

Yeah. He f***ing gave it to me.

Grace saw you leave with Kelli,

Mr. Smart-mouth.

Really?

No more smoking.

- What, you never had a bad habit?

- Listen,

everywhere you go,

you are leaving puzzle pieces

for anyone who's looking.

Up and at 'em, slugabed.

We're going shopping for school clothes.

Have I told you I have

a keen interest in birds?

They're such delicate creatures.

See that little birdie over there?

Been watching her for quite a while.

I followed her so many times.

We've been as close as this.

- Size 16, right?

- Yep. Thanks a bunch.

She don't recognize me.

She thinks she only knows me from here

in the store. I want you to follow her.

And then I want you to kill her.

Forget it.

- Listen. Listen to me.

- No, no, no. I already passed this test.

In your mind, count how many times

you could have done it.

And don't make something up.

I know where she goes and what she does.

Show me you can be white noise.

You do that,

and I'll tell you how I got Debbie Ann

to eat out of my hand.

She's off at 2:
00.

So wait. Wait. She... She still

doesn't lock that sliding door?

Test's over.

You'd be surprised

what people don't see.

I mean, they just never consider

there's somebody out there watching.

I get close and wait for that one...

unguarded moment.

Debbie Ann.

Debbie Ann was easy to notice.

I watched her for weeks,

just thinking about the whole thing,

just dreaming about doing it.

And I see...

this pretty,

yummy girl,

thin red lips,

thin line between white trash and whore.

And I think,

"Everything's easy for her."

And it just filled me with...

rage...

and...

lust.

And...

when I was done,

when I finished,

I left her Bible open to Hebrews 9:22.

"There can be no forgiveness

without the shedding of blood."

It's not too original, but I got better.

You never forget your first?

Or your last.

Great work with Judy Lynn today.

Tomorrow's my day off.

Got another field trip in mind.

How many truck stops

do we have in this country?

Thousands,

and every one of them

crawling with ungodly yummies.

This is the insider info

that you're giving up?

Nope. I'm trying to show you

the watch trick.

- The what?

- The watch trick.

See, now, looky here.

That little birdie has just come off

a long shift.

All she wants is to get home,

put on some sweats,

and watch a little reality TV

with her cat.

It's raining like crazy.

You pull up and ask her

if she'd like a ride home

or at least, you know,

somewhere out of the rain.

She knows she shouldn't.

She'll want to say, "No, thank you."

And that's when you do this.

That's the watch trick?

You're late. You got places to go.

You just stopped out of the kindness

of your heart to get her out of the rain.

- Who'd you use this on?

- No more out of me

till I see you get that girl

into this truck.

- Hi.

- Hey.

You look like you want to get out

of the rain. You want a ride somewhere dry?

No, it's cool. One of my friends

is gonna come get me.

That's kinda why I stopped.

I barely got through.

They closed the road down

because of the rain.

- Sh*t.

- Come on. You're getting soaked.

No, it's fine. Thank you.

Okay.

Wait, are... Wait.

Are you sure you don't mind?

Yeah. No, really, I don't.

It's not a big deal.

Okay. Thanks.

- I'm not done.

- Coffee's from those fellas.

Said black, right?

That right, bro?

Bet you ain't saying anything now?

I got your "f*** you" right here, man.

Let me tell you something, bro.

You see, I've been pushing a broom

two years over there,

you know, laughing at his

f***ing jokes and sh*t.

What, you appearing out of nowhere,

and suddenly I'm on the outside looking in.

Nah, f*** that, man.

I'm in line for that shop.

- Hey, hey, hey.

- F*** you gonna do?

I know you got me fired, right, b*tch?

You ain't doing sh*t, man. You ain't

doing sh*t. You a p*ssy. That's right.

Lucky these motherfuckers don't f***

your ass up right now. What you gonna do?

- You're pretty tough with all your boys?

- Yeah, that's right. That's right.

What the f*** you looking at?

You two are f***ing adorable,

by the way.

- Where you going, bro?

- Thank you so much.

I'm gonna go take a piss. You wanna

shake it for me, you little f*ggot?

That's right. Walk away, baby.

Walk away.

Believe this sh*t?

Punk ass.

Sorry about that.

- Van Wingerdt's.

- I knew you'd be there this early.

- Yo, I ran into your boy last night.

- I swear, if you hurt him...

Look, nothing happened. Okay?

But I found something on him, man.

I don't have time for this, Luis.

Please, man.

Look, he's not who he says he is.

Look, the last thing I want is for you

to be taken advantage of, man.

I don't know what you're talking about.

I can come by and show you,

Mr. Van Wingerdt.

One hour.

Cool.

What the f***? F***.

Oh, sh*t.

Sh*t. Sh*t. Sh*t.

No, no!

Let's go. Come on.

Get the f*** down. Get the f*** down.

Let me see your f***ing hands.

Where's it at?

- Where's what, man?

- Oh, where's what?

You don't know what the f***

I'm talking about? Where's the badge?

- It's in my f***ing pocket.

- Oh, it's in your pocket.

- I knew you were a f***ing cop, man.

- Yeah, you knew I was a cop. Get the f*** up.

Right over here.

What you running from, baby?

Why didn't you say good-bye to me last night?

- F*** you, man.

- Oh, f*** me?

You listening yet? You see this?

You're not gonna tell anybody about this,

not your homies, not Eugene, nobody.

You know what?

I don't f***ing believe you.

I know your type. You say one thing

when you're playing the victim

and another thing

when you get back to the crib.

Maybe you're just forgetful. I don't know.

I don't know. But you know what?

- It makes me f***ing sick.

- No.

So here's what we're gonna do.

I'm gonna leave you with something...

- ...that you won't forget about.

- F***. No, no. I swear, f***ing swear.

- I swear to God I won't say anything.

- "I swear to god." Shut the f*** up. You ready?

You breathe a word about me,

and I will cut your tongue from your mouth,

and I will f***ing feed it to you.

- You got me?

- I got you, man. I sw...

- Are you sure? Are you sure?

- I swear to God, man. I got you.

No, no, please. Please.

I got you, man. I got you.

- So you'll f***ing remember?

- I promise, man. I swear.

- Have a nice f***ing day.

- F***ing...

F***ing...

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