The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel 2 Page #8

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Until you die, obviously.

Um, darling...

What?

I went to look for a friend last night.

Evelyn. Yes.

I was hoping to meet her properly.

- She checked out.

- As in...

I think she went back to Jaipur.

Then what are you waiting for?

But I'm here.

I came here to see your speech.

Oh, bollocks to that!

You wouldn't understand a word.

Dad.

You've spent your life seeking out people

who can stop you being happy.

Doing the things you want to do.

Don't put that on me too.

Don't make me even more

like mum than I am already.

You have all the good bits,

all the brilliant bits.

Go on.

I'll make it alright with her. Go.

Yes.

- Thank you.

- Bye.

I've bought a present for your niece.

Something from the market.

I hope that's alright.

Much more than alright.

Good. Will you give it to her?

Of course.

Actually, wait a minute.

Which way is your house?

This way.

She's my sister.

Namaste.

My brother. My cousin sisters.

Namaste.

My cousin brothers. And 3 of my friends.

- Namaste.

- Namaste.

- My uncle.

- Namaste.

- My auntie.

- Namaste.

And...

Hello, darling.

She still wants to read your book.

Your uncle told me

how very brave you're being...

and I thought you deserved a reward.

What you do is wind her up like this.

And then, very gently...

That was me when I was her age.

Twirling away.

I wasn't bad, I don't think,

but I gave it up.

Just like most things in my life.

- Which is your house?

- Uh...

White house. I was born there.

So was she and her sisters.

My sister. My whole family.

What a lovely place to have lived.

I'm very happy you came.

So... what happened last night?

You left in a hurry.

I went to talk to the inspector.

And?

His mind was on other matters.

Because he's not the inspector.

No, Lavinia Beech is. Except her name's

not Lavinia and she's American.

And you've done nothing but show her

the back of your hand

since she got here.

That is absolutely not true.

My God, that is true.

Excuse me.

Miss... Miss... Miss...

Miss...

- Beech.

- Miss Beech. How delightful to see you.

Might I ask most humbly

if you have plans

for today and, if so,

can I feature in them?

I was actually just

on my way to see Kushal.

And is that, if so bold I might be,

for the purposes of

business or pleasure?

Both, really.

No offense, but I think in the end

the Supreme Quality will

just suit my mother perfectly.

Please, madam, I'll give you

a better room. One that's finished.

Sonny. I heard you were looking for me?

Room 6 will shortly be available.

- I'm in room 6.

- You are? She is?

A lot's been going on.

I'm sorry, no.

So, Mr. Chambers.

Could you hold on a sec, Miss Beech?

The great Mr. Chambers.

The great writer Mr. Chambers.

- Sure, if you like.

- I do not like, sir. I do not like one bit!

What did you wanna tell me?

To leave this hotel and never darken

its towels again.

- You lied, sir.

- He did not lie.

You pretended not to be

something you weren't.

There was an inspector.

It just wasn't him. It was that one.

Lavinia. Except that's

not your name, is it?

No. My name's Theresa.

I knew that I knew you.

You work for the competition.

- "Golden Years," right?

- Correct.

How did you know that?

It's his business to know.

And ours to know what he's up to.

Please explain.

She is a hotel inspector. Just not

the one that they were worried about.

That would be me.

I told you.

The nose knew.

While there are patterns we can study...

to mitigate the amplitude

of the extreme highs and lows...

that characterize any entrepreneurial

journey, they'll come anyway.

But don't let that stop you

because the highs...

like being here today with you all,

make everything worthwhile.

Just get in the game.

I'll see you in the bar. Thank you.

They were riveted.

Riveted, they were. No, really.

Thank you.

Laura's success continues, evidently.

Yes, I'm very proud of her.

It's a shame Douglas

couldn't be here to enjoy it.

What exactly is your job here?

Sourcing fabrics and liaising between

the merchants and

the company I work for.

Doesn't that just trip off the tongue.

Oh, it's easier to say than to do.

Well, you look as if you're handling it.

I must say, I admire

what you've made of yourself here.

Thank you.

There's only one thing puzzling me.

Douglas pleaded not guilty to adultery.

Why would that be?

Do you not fancy him?

Even when I could hardly stand the man,

I still found him rather attractive.

In some ways rather more so than Daniel.

Well, Douglas has one great advantage

over Daniel which is

that he actually exists.

Daniel exists.

- He does.

- Oh, if you say so.

I work in his office.

I've started doing clerical stuff,

Tuesdays and Thursdays...

just to keep the ends meeting.

Money doesn't stretch as far

in Reigate as in Rajasthan.

Daniel knows my name,

of course, we're a small team.

But he hasn't proposed,

I grant you that.

That's why I want the divorce.

I can hardly expect a man to want

to go out with me while I'm still married.

What do you suppose

we should do for our first date?

I'm too embarrassed to ask Laura.

A film? A shared experience.

Something to talk about afterwards.

Which will prevent

any possible awkwardness.

Oh, there won't be any awkwardness.

No, I don't suppose there will be.

There are some people into whose laps

the good things in life fall.

I'm not one of them.

Coming out here finally taught me that.

So, if the good things

won't come on their own,

I must make them.

And that's what I intend to do.

...given them roots and now they can...

Sonny and Sunaina's wonderful families

have given them roots and now...

- Sunaina?

- You can't come in.

I don't want you to see

the dress until Friday.

I need my clipboard.

You know the names of the guests.

Why do you need a clipboard?

It's just an excuse to come in.

I must apologize to you.

You apologized already.

I mean it more now.

And I promise you three things.

I promise I will properly rehearse

the wedding dance.

I promise I'll wear the turban

your mother chose for the ceremony.

And I promise I'll be a better

husband than fianc.

Good... because

you're a terrible fianc.

Listen to me.

If there is ever a time

in our life together when...

I find myself attracted to another man

or even confused a little,

I will always tell you.

And that way, you know that

I will never, ever act on it.

I don't find Kush attractive.

His ears are too close to his head.

I hoped you would find

his offer of a partnership...

more attractive.

But that is up to you.

Have you seen my other shoe, darling?

If you don't tell me what's been

the problem for the last few days,

I'll need it to kick you with.

Your shoe's under the bed.

And you're having an affair.

Oh, so it is. Wonderful.

I said I know you're sleeping

with someone else.

Of course I am, darling. Aren't you?

What about that twitchy

little witch at the club? Susan.

Obviously you've both been at it

like rabbits for weeks now.

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