The Big Broadcast of 1938 Page #2

What do you mean, I'm all

teed off? Don't be rude.

How far is this hole?

420 yards, sir.

420 yards. 420 yards.

The wind against me.

Hand me that putter!

Thank you.

Stand clear, boy. Keep

your eye on the ball.

Ahh... a lily! I was

afraid I'd miss that.

Ah, thank you, George.

Here we go. Gangway, boys!

Where's the ball? Sorry, sir.

Hasn't got here yet.

Ah, the wind's against me.

Here she comes now.

- There she is. Stand clear.

- Keep your eye on the ball.

There goes the Colossal, Mr. Bellows.

We got another 20 minutes.

It's a lily! That ball will

run like a frightened fawn.

Look out, boys. Get away!

Gangway! Gangway!

Gangway, boys.

Here you are.

Gangway, you children

of the fairway.

A lily! Driver! Driver!

Driver, driver.

Driver!

Ow!

None of your liberties,

you silly-looking capper!

Pick up those lost balls.

You look more like Mickey Mouse

than Mickey Mouse does himself.

You're a coot! A coot. You

understand? Yes, sir.

Ah, thank you.

Not to be confused

with cootie.

Just a coot.

Not a good-looking

coot, either.

An ordinary coot.

Common garden coot.

Stand clear. Keep

your eye on the ball.

A ringer! A ringer.

Stand clear!

A weed-bound ball.

Stand clear, boys. We

gotta catch that skiff.

Stand clear!

C'mon, Seabiscuit. Gimme

that 404 elephant gun.

C'mon, hand it to me.

Don't stand there.

Fore!

100% dynamite.

Hope I didn't hit anybody.

Oh.

Fore!

Fore!

Good morning, Larceny, uh...

Larsen.

Had a bad time in that trap, didn't

you, Mr. Bellows? Got out in one poke.

I thought it took you several. I had a

bad time killing a stubborn wombat.

Little beggars get

into your shoe.

Good morning, Mr. Bellows.

Good morning, Goolkswankez.

How's your game? Oh...

eighteen for nine holes.

Thirty-one. You're holding the

card upside down. Nosey Parker.

It's coming to a pretty

pass when a common caddy...

tells a gentleman how

to hold his card.

Ah, there's that

tongue sandwich now.

How'd it get into there?

Ladies and gentlemen, the greatest

race of the age will soon be on.

Two giant greyhounds of the sea

battling for the crossing record,

and may this one... I

mean, the best one, win.

Sis-boom-ba, rah, rah, rah.

All right, Mike. Don't

knock yourself out.

We will soon pass Ambrose Light where

the race will officially begin.

Between you and me, the

Gigantic can't lose.

With our new radio power,

we'll skip to France...

before you can say, "Jack

Robinson." Jack Robinson.

Now, ladies and gentlemen, I

want to introduce a man...

who made a bubble into a musical

career, Mr. Shep Fields.

Two years ago come

next wash day,

Shep became the Columbus of the swing

world by discovering rippling rhythm.

Here he is, Mr. Shep

Fields in person,

who will show you how

rippling rhythm was born.

Okay, Shep, let her ripple.

Hey!

Do you call that music?

Let me show ya.

This little ripple had rhythm

And the other little

ripples had none

All day through

and all night too

He kept on singing Boodle-de-doop,

boodle-de-doop boodle-de-doop

Now they say the kid's okay

They love to play his

boodle-de-doop, boodle-de-doop

Boodle-de-doop boop

Oh, my hat!

Thank you. It blew off.

It's a new hat. I know it.

How? Old hats never blow off.

Well, thank you for your

trouble. I like catching hats!

Some people like to go to fires. Some

raise tulips. I love catching hats.

What do you do when

there's no wind? I brood.

Oh!

Aah!

Whew! As long as we're gonna

make this our life's work, we

should know each other.

- I'm Robert Hayes.

- I'm Dorothy Wyndham.

- How do you do?

- Very well at the moment.

- What do you do when you're not

chasing hats? - I'm an inventor.

- That radio power plant's mine.

- Ohh!

Oh.

Well, girl loses hat,

boy rescues hat.

Girl is grateful for hat. Oh!

Boy is grateful for wind.

Pitter! Patter! Putter!

Ow! You keep your face clean.

Give me that " can't stay

out" putter. Quick! Hurry up!

What's the matter with you?

Stand clear. Keep

your eye on the ball.

She's in! She's out.

I've missed it.

Come, come.

Come, my little pilliwink.

Aha! She's in.

The only way to play it.

She made the round trip.

Ah, that reminds me.

I must send the little

lady her alimony.

Fifty-seven! A new

course record.

Are you going to keep the

card, sir? Keep nothing.

- No one ever doubts my word.

- Keep the ball instead.

What's that? You've missed

the Colossal, sir.

Oh, that's what you think.

We're off, Pegasus!

Thanks. Gangway, eagles!

Honk, honk. Must be

the China Clipper.

C'mon on, boys.

Have I got double vision?

Gangway! Colossal, ahoy!

Gangway!

Colossal, ahoy!

He can't land here.

He's going to put it down.

Clear the deck!

Clear the decks.

Take it easy, Pegasus. Liable to have

punctured one of the balloonies.

Don't you know better than

to land here, you idiot?

Quiet, pip-squeak. Stand clear,

folks, and keep your eye on the ball.

What's going on here? Evidently a

telegram for me. Hand it over.

- I'm the captain.

- I thought you were a messenger boy.

Who are you? My

name is Bellows.

Oh, yes, Mr. Bellows. I'm

pleased to meet you.

You saw my hand. Stop your

twitting. Where are we?

- We're just passing a bar. - Keep right

on going. We'll stop at the next one.

We're just approaching the light ship

where the record run formally begins.

Ah... go down and open a

case for me, will ya?

Wipe the top of

the bottle off.

Anything I can do for you?

See? You've made

the captain angry.

Too bad you can't show us that trick

invention. Who said I couldn't?

This little squirt, Hayes.

Huh?

He's tough. He is, eh? Step

up on those handlebars.

Tell him I'm tough too. I can

lick my weight in wildflowers.

Follow me.

But, Mr. Bellows...

Quiet, please.

This way, scums, eh... chums.

This is known as the

chambre de electric...

or the geegaw room.

Robert Hayes is the inventor,

I understand. What?

Why, that lug stole

the idea from me.

I muttered my plans one night whilst

in the throes of delirium tremens...

Er, uh, old-fashioned

stomachache.

Do you know anything

about electricity?

My father occupied the chair of applied

electricity at state's prison.

What is this thing up here?

Uh? Oh, that. Yes.

It's a patent cigar

cutter, I think.

Look out. You've broken it.

Can you fix it?

I'll fix it so that

nobody else can.

This, gentlemen, is a, uh...

still.

Put the mash in here and

it comes out, uh...

If I knew where it comes out,

I'd be there myself right now.

Yeah.

Stand clear, Mr. Bellows!

Get back!

I can't. I'm caught. Let

go of your umbrella.

I can't do that either.

You nearly lost your life, sir.

My life matters but little.

Look at that umbrella, an impulsive

gift from the Ranee of Giz.

Mr. Hayes, are you ready to

turn on your electric power?

Yes, sir. I hope so.

Electricity, bah!

Lock those doors! But,

Mr. Bellows, I...

Don't "but'" me. Who's the

boss around here?

Lock 'em, I tell you.

Lock 'em.

I heard what he said.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote