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The Brady Bunch Movie
- PG-13
- Year:
- 1995
- 90 min
- 1,801 Views
That's what's brilliant about you. Who
else would build a residential mini-mall?
Now everyone else
agrees to your offer...
It's got to be everyone
on the block or the deal's off.
We're heading into the canyon.
I think I'm losing you, Mr Feldman.
Cut the crap, Dittmeyer,
did you get everyone or not?
- There's one family that's holding out.
- Then up the offer.
It's not that simple. It's like
they're not interested in money.
- It's like they're not normal.
- Why not? What's their story?
Here's the story of a lovely lady
Who was bringing up
three very lovely girls
All of them had hair of gold
like their mother
The youngest one in curls
It's the story of a man named Brady
Who was busy
with three boys of his own
They were four men living all together
Yet they were all alone
Till the one day
when the lady met this fellow
And they knew
that it was much more than a hunch
That this group
must somehow form a family
That's the way
The Brady Bunch
The Brady Bunch
That's the way
- Morning, Mrs Brady.
- Oh, thanks, Alice.
- Morning, Alice.
- Careful, Mr Brady. Don't bend over.
We've gotten the Dittmeyer's
mail again, sweetheart.
You'd think by now
they'd know who lives where.
Well, I always know where
to deliver my mail.
Mr Brady.
Marcia's been
in the bathroom a super-long time.
Cindy, we've told you before,
no one likes a tell-tale.
- But, Daddy...
- Your father's right.
- Help Alice make some cookies.
- OK, Mommy.
- Can my doll help, too?
- As long as it's not Betsy Wetsy.
She makes my cookies soggy-woggy.
4,998...
Come on, Marcia. I've got to shave.
4,999...
Marcia, there are others
- 5,000.
- Come on, Marcia.
Doug Simpson's
sure to notice me today.
- All finished.
- Finally.
- Greg.
- Jan, wait your turn.
It's never my turn.
Jan, did you move my trophies?
Yes. I couldn't look in the mirror
without seeing the awards...
my white knee socks.
Not everything in this room is yours.
See, Jan, I told you they were mine.
Put them back and close the drawer.
She has every right to be mad.
They are her socks.
But why does Marcia
get all the socks?
Why does Marcia
get all the trophies?
Why does Marcia
get all the good drawers?
Yeah, why does Marcia
get everything?
Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!
It's closed!
Come on, Greg, hurry up.
- Boy, he's worse than Marcia!
- Hey, what's wrong with your voice?
My libido is increasing rapidly,
and the surge of hormones causes...
...dramatic physical
and emotional changes.
That's what Miss Lynley
told us in health class.
- Finally.
- Yeah.
You kids have no idea
how to impress a chick.
Maybe when you're older, you'll
get hip to what it's like being a man.
Good news, Greg. I'm putting on your
favourite Scooby-Doo bed sheets.
Scooby-Dooby-Doo!
Honey,
I think you've stirred that enough.
I'm not stirring. I'm looking for
Katie Carry-All's underpants.
I'll take over the cookies and you run
these letters to the Dittmeyer's.
And see if they've gotten
any of our mail.
OK, Mommy.
Missy, get your butt-ugly face
down here.
- Hello, Eric. Are your parents home?
- Blow off, cheeseball. Missy!
Shut up,
before you have a toxic dump.
Hello, Missy. How's your science
project coming? I've finished mine.
What are you going to do? Hand in
your face and call it barf mould?
See you on the see-saw, Cindy.
Bye.
I promised they'd sell.
Yeah, I took it in the rear on that.
But this time I'm doing the screwing.
Just make sure one
hold-out family doesn't wreck this.
Can I call you back? Thanks.
- Hello, Mr Dittmeyer.
- Why are you here?
Oh, thanks.
Mom asks
if there's any mail for us here.
I don't understand you.
What do you want?
Mom asks
if there's any mail for us here.
What?
- No, not a clue.
- She wants the Brady's mail, Larry!
Thanks. So kind of you to climb out
from under your hangover.
Let's see, where did I file your mail?
Oh, yes.
- Hi, honey.
- Hi.
- How's your daddy?
- Fine.
Mrs Brady's lucky to have a big,
strong, virile man like that.
Tell you what, sweetie,
next Christmas tell your daddy
I'd be more than happy
to wrap his package.
Here. Hit the road, bad seed.
- The juice will make your shoes slip.
- What?
Your shoes will slip in the juice.
- Bye.
- Bye-bye.
Daddy, Mrs Dittmeyer said...
...she'd be glad to wrap
your package this Christmas.
Really? How is Mrs Dittmeyer?
Mr Dittmeyer says she's overhung.
He's bad-tempered
because he's taking it in the rear.
Must be that paper boy again.
That's Mr Dittmeyer's business.
- I'm not a snitch. I just tell it like it is.
When you tattle on someone,
you're telling on yourself as well.
And by tattling on someone,
you're telling them, "I'm a tattle-tale".
Is that the tale you want to tell?
- I never thought of it like that.
- It's time to get your school things.
OK, Mommy.
- What is it?
- A letter from the County.
They say we haven't paid
our property taxes.
- We always pay our taxes.
- They say it's the fifth notice.
And we owe them $20,000 by the end
of the week or they'll auction our house.
- $20,000? There has to be a mix-up!
- I'd better call someone.
We are?
You do?
I see. We should?
You are?
All right. Goodbye.
- We owe them.
- Oh, Mike.
Don't worry, honey.
We'll find the money.
But we used our savings to go
to the Grand Canyon and Hawaii.
What are we going to do, Mike?
OK, troops. Time for school!
Greg, Marcia, Peter,
Jan, Bobby, Cindy.
- Do we always have to walk so close?
- Oh, Jan!
Mom, can I borrow your car?
I want to ask Donna
to go for a soda after school.
- All right, but no hot-rodding.
- Thanks, Mom.
She's the most
far-out chick in my class.
You wouldn't believe
how much I dig her.
I would. I've been digging Sam so long,
by the time he proposes I'll be dead.
- Alice, what would we do without you?
- Probably eat out.
Why the long face, Bobby?
Well, ever since I became
nobody'll talk to me.
They think I'm some kind of fink.
People like to be corrected
when they're doing something wrong.
- That's how we improve ourselves.
- Right, Dad.
If your sister wore her glasses,
she might improve her eyesight.
Marcia doesn't have to wear glasses.
Besides, my friends say
glasses make me look goofy.
Honey, you look lovely with your
glasses on. Doesn't she, kids?
Far out, Jan. You look great.
Yeah, I mean it. Out of sight.
Really terrific. Honest.
All right, troops.
Off to school. Have a good day.
Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.
- Come on, Marcia.
- I'm coming.
Jan, a real friend likes you for
who you are, not what's on your face.
If you judge your friends for judging
you, you're not only judging yourself,
you're judging your friends,
and that's bad judgement.
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"The Brady Bunch Movie" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 7 Sep. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_brady_bunch_movie_19838>.
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