The Bridge on the River Kwai Page #5

We're trying to discourage the use of

that word. Such a melodramatic air.

What do you do here?

Sabotage, demolition,

that line of country.

We're using P.E., plastic explosives.

It's wonderful.

That pop was made

with a lump half this size.

It's twice as powerful as gelignite

at half the weight.

It's quite harmless

until it's detonated.

Thanks for telling me.

It's completely waterproof

and actually plastic.

You can do what you like with it.

This is my place.

Go ahead.

Oh, I'm dying for a cup of tea.

- Would you care for one?

- No, thanks.

- A drink?

- No, thank you.

- Pot of tea for one, please, Peter.

- Very good, sir.

Do you read this?

I taught Oriental languages

at Cambridge before the war.

I never congratulated you

on your escape. Good show!

If your sea rescue plane hadn't

spotted me, I wouldn't be here.

No, I suppose not.

Would you like to see where you were?

All right.

Our information's scanty.

It's based on your report.

We think the camp's here.

Do your people have any idea

what happened to Col. Nicholson?

He had guts. They were about to

shoot him and he didn't bat an eye.

If you're about to be shot

there's not much you can do.

Here is the river Kwai, and here's

the village where you were helped.

Here is the railway.

You must be fairly familiar

with this area.

No, I was out of my head

half the time.

The railway starts down here

in Singapore. Malaya...

...Bangkok, Rangoon. Their idea

is to drive on through, into India.

- Where was I picked up?

- Oh, about here.

The Japanese aim to open the Bangkok-

Rangoon section by the middle of May.

We'll try to prevent them.

It's too far for bombers

to carry a load.

We'll have to go smash it

on the ground.

- How?

- Parachute drop, then march.

With demolition equipment

through that jungle?

Our chief problem

is lack of firsthand knowledge.

You see, none of us have

ever been there.

- I don't want to discourage-

- It should be interesting.

Col. Green's given me the Kwai bridge.

I'm taking a team in to blow it up.

Lucky you.

Sure you won't have tea?

No, thanks. I don't want to be rude,

but I've got a date at 2.

- If there are any questions...

- Of course, I'm sorry.

Well, there is only

one question, actually.

How would you feel about going back?

Come again?

Under the circumstances

it's a bit much...

...but you have a unique

knowledge for our purpose.

We'd love to have you with us.

That's why you brought me here?

To ask me this?

Well, frankly, yes.

I just got out of there.

My escape was a miracle. Now

you want me to go back! Ridiculous!

This is embarrassing-

I don't belong to you.

I belong to the American Navy.

Actually, Col. Green has taken

the matter up with your people.

- With my people?

- Your Navy's turned you over to us.

A signal arrived yesterday morning

from the Pacific...

...authorizing your temporary transfer

of duty to Force 316.

- They can't do this!

- I'm afraid they have.

It was hard to break it to you.

But they can't do this to me.

I mean it. My Navy's made a mistake!

Look. I'm not a Navy commander.

I'm not even an officer.

The whole thing's a fake. I'm just

an ordinary swab jockey, second class.

When the Houston sunk, I made

it ashore with a real commander.

We ran into a Japanese patrol.

He was killed.

I figured it was just

a matter of time till I-

So you changed uniforms

with a dead man.

I thought officers would get better

treatment in prison camps.

But with Saito, the officers

worked along with the rest.

There's always the unexpected,

isn't there?

I kind of got used

to being a commander...

...so when I arrived

at the hospital...

...I took a look at the enlisted men's

ward and then the officer's ward...

...and I said to myself, " Let's let

it ride along for a while. "

There were certain advantages.

I saw one of them on the beach.

That's the whole story.

The point is, you can't use me.

You want an officer...

...an American Commander Shears

who doesn't exist.

When the Navy learns the truth,

they'll say:

"Ship him home

for impersonating an officer. "

- Once that happens, I've got it made.

- Got it what?

Made! I'd like that drink now.

I'll apply for a medical discharge.

I'll say I impersonated an officer

because I went crazy in the jungle.

I'm getting worse. Sometimes

I think I'm Admiral Halsey.

It's quite a clever plan.

Not only clever, it's foolproof.

If my Navy finds out who I am...

...those orders won't be worth

the paper they're written on.

Isn't this your photograph?

- Where did you get this?

- It took some doing...

...since your people

couldn't identify you.

Finally your C-in-C Pacific

sent us a copy of your service record.

The photograph, fingerprints.

Would you care to have a look?

You see, we've known about your actual

rank for nearly a week.

Your Navy's in an awkward position.

In one sense you're a hero...

...for making an escape

from the jungle.

At the same time, they can't

bring you home...

...and give you the Navy Cross for

impersonating an officer.

I suppose that's why they were

happy to hand you over.

You see?

Hot potato.

As far as your rank is concerned...

...we're fairly informal

about that in Force 316.

You'd have the simulated

rank of major.

A simulated major. That figures.

Well...

As long as I'm hooked,

I might as well volunteer.

Good show!

Oh, Colonel Green, sir.

This is Major Shears. He volunteered

to go and help me blow up the bridge.

Really?

Good show!

Jolly good show, major!

Get up to sick bay.

This foot's infected.

Colonel might think I'm malingering.

I'm the medical officer.

Get cracking!

Will someone tell me why

he wants to build a proper bridge?

Don't worry about old Nick.

He knows what he's doing.

Hello, Clipton.

About time you paid us a visit.

Fine job our chaps are doing.

Yes. How's he behaving?

He's been most reasonable

since we took over.

- What's he thinking?

- I haven't the foggiest.

- Thanks, Reeves.

- Right, sir.

What do you think?

Quite a challenge, isn't it?

Are you convinced that building

this bridge is a good idea?

- Are you serious?

- Yes, sir.

A good idea? Take another look.

You don't agree morale is high?

Discipline has been restored?

Their condition has improved?

Are they a happier lot

or aren't they?

They feed better

and they are no longer abused.

Honestly, Clipton, there are times

when I don't understand you at all.

I'll try to make myself clear.

The fact is, what we're doing

could be construed as...

...forgive me, sir,

collaboration with the enemy.

Perhaps even treason.

We're prisoners of war. We haven't

the right to refuse to work.

I understand that, sir.

But must we work so well?

Must we do better

than they could themselves?

If you had to operate on Saito,

would you do your best or let him die?

Would you prefer

we disintegrate in idleness?

Or have it said

we can't do a proper job?

It's important to show them they

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