The Brothers

What do you think

your dreams mean, Jackson?

They're about relationships,

commitments.

Do you think a commitment

with a woman is death?

Yeah, right. See,

you meet somebody, right?

You are having a good time,

vibing together...

...then love drags its ass up into it.

- What do women want from you?

- That's easy.

They want money, multiple orgasms...

...and beautiful shoes

that don't hurt like hell.

That's really sexist.

Except for the part about the shoes.

I'll be 29 on my next birthday.

- Why does that bother you?

- It's one step from the big 3-0.

I can't keep blaming my lack of

a relationship on being a kid anymore.

I broke up with three women

in the last two months.

Maybe you should become celibate.

Put the physical behind

your spiritual self.

Sorry, doc, but my spiritual self

needs a booty.

I have an assignment for you.

I want you to get out there

and date some more.

In fact, try to meet a woman tonight.

I'm shooting hoops with the fellas.

Then we hang.

It's a weekly tradition.

Then do it whenever.

The next time, open up

your heart to her.

Try being a friend,

before you become her lover.

I can handle that.

Motion to suppress, denied.

Motion for evidentiary hearing,

denied.

Motion for continuance, denied.

All of my motions denied?

May I ask why?

Your affidavit wasn't based

on credible facts.

This court will not tolerate that.

Motions denied.

Thank you, Your Honour.

- B*tch.

- What did you say?

Come on, Shawshank, let's go.

The judge is springing you.

It's about goddamn time.

That woman is crazy.

Come on. You're lucky you ain't

working for her cranky ass.

Yes, Sheila, I am meeting the brothers

after work for our game.

Yes, we are going

to the club afterwards.

Now, how is my baby gonna miss me

when she's gonna be asleep?

What if I ran the streets?

I have a job too.

You shouldn't talk like that.

You need Jesus.

The European earnings report

just came in.

Lovely. I'll look at them tonight.

Is there anything else

I can do for you?

- No, Sandra, thank you. I'm straight.

- Nothing?

- No, I'm straight.

- Nothing at all?

I'm cool. I'm cool.

Take care of yourself, okay?

Yes, Terry White.

Hey, baby. Yeah, I'm packing up

right now to get out of here.

Yeah, it's all set for tonight.

Baby, you got nothing to worry about...

Oh, sh*t. Baby, I gotta go.

She's gonna need to take her medicine

and keep her throat warm.

Thanks. So, doctor, would

you like to meet my sister?

She's really great.

I'm kind of off the market right now.

Hey! You ain't got time for me now?

You had time when you wanted to have

sex with me, but now you're busy.

Yo, Derrick,

I did not think you saw me.

I do what I can, baby.

- That was luck.

- It won't happen again.

You want to hear

what happened to me today?

I'm packing up my stuff.

I turn around and a temp's

in front of me.

I'm not gonna lie. She was banging.

This girl jumps on my sh*t, man.

I think you're lying!

Hey, D. How long you known me, baby?

I don't lie about my sh*t.

That sh*t always happens to me.

How was it, Terry?

- I didn't do it.

- Sh*t.

What, you A.C. Green now?

I lectured her about compromising

a brother at work...

...then I left.

I would've waxed that ass

all over the office.

There would've been X eroxes

of my nuts on everybody's desk.

You see the problem is,

you need help, bro.

Me and my girl, BeBe,

got something solid.

I'll make a declaration

right here, right now.

From this moment forward,

I'm a one-woman man.

After two months of dating? That's

gotta be a record for being whipped.

You're not talking

about being whipped.

Terry, we know you. You can't change.

What about when you talked

to the girl and her mom...

...and then they both found out?

- I remember that.

That was a long time ago.

I'm not like that anymore.

If you're changing, Terry,

I'm changing too.

- It's about time.

- As of now, I'm through with sisters.

That's a broken record, D.

I'm serious this time, man.

You know Carla, the judge?

She locked me up because

she's an evil, bitter, black woman.

Did you forget that you had sex

with her...

...dumped her and called her

a "b*tch" in the courtroom?

What's your point, man?

Maybe she had other reasons

to do that.

The boy's ignorant.

All sisters bring drama. No matter

what you do, it ain't good enough.

I'm tired of the fake hair.

The "that's my baby's father."

The excess weight.

They're giving out government cheese

sandwiches with the fake hair.

- What does that tell you?

- That you're a dumb-ass.

You give up on sisters,

you give up on yourself.

Word!

- I think Brian may have a point.

- Thank you.

It's not colour,

but what's inside that counts.

Did your wife tell you that before

or after she unscrewed your dick.

Don't listen to him, D.

We're here, Jack.

No, we're not there. I'm not going

out on the sisters like you.

I haven't found the right one.

Gotta look harder.

See, now I can dig that.

Let's keep it real.

We're single, black, professional men.

- We're the cream of the crop.

- I'll keep it real for you.

We're the cream of the crop. You're

the sh*t on the bottom of the barrel.

We deserve the best, and now,

the sisters ain't up to the job.

You're wrong. When I met Sheila,

I snapped her up.

That and she got pregnant.

No, it didn't have nothing

to do with that.

We were gonna get married.

We were in love.

Love, there's a word to look up

in the dictionary.

It's after "ignorant"

and just before "stupid," stupid.

- We'll be at the bar.

- Where's Terry? He's missing.

Went back to work on that temp

if he's smart.

No, he will be here, trust me.

He will be here.

- Oh, damn.

- Come on, B, now why'd you do that?

- I told you, I'm done with them.

- She looks cool.

Go and work

your brown magic, man.

- You want me to?

- Work it.

All right, all right. Check it out.

Excuse me. I'm sorry about

that little thing over there.

I had the worst day in court.

- So you're a lawyer?

- Yeah.

- I used to work for a lawyer.

- Really?

- Hey, I'm Brian.

- I'm Lamuzindah.

- La moo what?

- Lamuzindah.

"Goddess of light."

Okay. Cool. Do your thing.

You know what? You just look

so, so nurturing to me.

Do you have any kids, you know?

Actually, I do. You want to see

some pictures of Tanesha and Tenaka?

I got them right here.

No. Slow down with the kids.

Have a nice evening.

Tanesha and Tenaka.

The defence rests.

Forget you then.

Fellas, fellas, fellas.

Sorry I'm late.

Bartender, I need some of your best

champagne and five glasses.

- Champagne?

- It's always so crowded in here.

- Nice of you to bring a date.

- Right, well, listen up.

Tonight is a little different.

You ready to do this?

BeBe and I, we're getting married.

Hey, Terry. Congratulations, baby.

- Hey, good luck.

- That's nice.

- Congratulations, T.

- Thank you.

- There goes my buzz.

- What is your problem?

Now, hold on, baby. Let me get this.

I'll slide out of your way.

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