The Bullfighters

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- What's the matter with you?

- I haven't got my air legs yet.

Oh, nonsense,

the trip down here was beautiful.

And here we are

in beautiful Mexico City.

The land of sunshine

and good fellowship.

And the land of beautiful seoritas.

- Yes, and those good old hot tamales.

- Ha-ha-ha-ha!

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Whew.

Get me out of here.

HARDY:

To the Hotel El Matador, please.

Well, at last we've got a whole cab

all to ourselves.

Yes, sir,

it was worthwhile waiting for.

You know, we should have taken

this cab in the first place.

Then we wouldn't have any...

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Thank you, gentlemen.

- How much, my good man?

- Dos pesos.

Dos pesos.

Stanley, get the book.

You'll find it in the D's.

Dees, dems, dose...

Dos pesos.

Why, that's two dollars.

- That's what I've been trying to tell you.

- Thank you.

- Pay him, Stanley.

- Why didn't you say so in the first place?

CLERK:
Give this to Mr. Coleman

as soon as you see him. Rush it.

Thanks, I'll rush it to him.

- Anything for me, handsome?

- No, Miss Blake.

The afternoon mail...

...won't be in for half an hour.

- Oh.

Well, I'll be back by then.

CLERK:
Good morning, gentlemen.

- Good morning.

Have you a reservation

for Mr. Laurel and Mr. Hardy?

Indeed I have, sir.

- Welcome to Mexico City.

- Thank you.

- Got a room for Mr. McCoy?

- Yes, sir.

- He's forging my name.

- Shh.

I'm sorry, sir,

but I require your address.

Golly, I can't write.

Thanks, partner.

Take this gentleman to 410, please.

- Here on pleasure?

- Pleasure and business.

Oh, I see.

Something very confidential.

We're looking for a girl

by the name of Hattie Blake.

- Better known as Larceny Nell.

- What?

I say, we are looking for a girl

by the name of Hattie Blake...

Oh, shut up.

- Is that so?

- Yes, sir.

Gentlemen, she just left the hotel,

but she'll be back very shortly.

We'll hang around the lobby.

When you see her come in,

will you give us the eye?

Anything to help John Law.

- Thank you.

- Boy, take those bags up to 418, please.

- And will you take these coats also?

- Yes, sir.

I wish the convention was over,

so I could get out of this rented suit.

You hurry up

and get your shopping done.

All right. Don't you forget to memorize

your speech.

- I won't. Don't forget them lovebirds.

- All right, babykins.

- Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

"Fellow Bricklayers, having been called

upon by the president of our local...

...to make a few remarks

regarding our honorable profession...

...I know that you guys like myself...

...having gone past the fourth grade in

school, will understand my sentiments.

And I take great pleasure in..."

Pardon me, my good man,

but would you move over a trifle, please?

Thank you.

"Fellow Bricklayers, having..."

I'm terribly sorry, but...

...accidents will happen.

"Fellow Bricklayers, having been called

upon by the president of our local...

...to make a few remarks regarding our

profession..."

"Fellow Bricklayers, having been called

upon by the president of our local...

...to make a few remarks

regarding our honorable profession..."

"Fellow Bricklayers, having been called

upon by the president of our local..."

"Fellow Bricklayers,

having been called upon..."

"Fellow Bricklayers, having been called

upon by the president of our local...

...to make a few remarks regarding

our honorable profession...

...I know that you guys like myself...

...having gone past the fourth grade

in school...

...will understand my sentiments,

and I take great pleasure in..."

Gentlemen!

[YELLS IN SPANISH]

What's going on here?

Who started this?

- He did.

- He did. I'm sitting, learning my speech...

- What were you doing?

- I was minding my own business.

I was sitting here,

and I turned that like that.

Just to see what would happen.

- Oh, so you did it.

- I didn't.

Come here. Stand right there.

- Will you hold him there?

- With pleasure.

Thank you. Don't let him move.

Who is the dancer?

She is most wonderful in all the world.

My little Conchita.

And who is going to fix it so I work...

...at the Caf of the Bullfighters...

...and be big success?

I am.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Come in.

Excuse me, Mr. Muldoon,

but Hotshot Coleman is here.

Okay, send him in.

Well, well, Richard K.

What's the good word?

Everything in the palm of the hand.

What's new with you?

Hello, Gump.

Meet Seorita Conchita.

- Mucho gusto.

- The pleasure is mutual.

I have Don Sebastian photos

from Spain.

Those will do for the billboards

and papers.

Fine, Hotshot.

You and I should clean up...

...a basketful on this promotion.

COLEMAN:
That's a cinch.

What are trying to give me, Hotshot?

What's the gag?

Those are the pictures

I promised you, RK.

Don Sebastian,

the world's greatest bullfighter.

You're nuts, Hotshot.

This guy's from Peoria, Illinois.

I know him, and I've got good cause

to remember him.

You're nuts. He's never been out

of Spain. It's his first trip to Mexico.

Show him the envelope

the pictures came in. Look here.

Look at that:
Spanish stamps.

It's inconceivable

that there could be two faces like that.

- But you're convinced, huh?

- See, here's the photographer's name...

...El Toro Studio, Barcelona, Spain.

I'd swear it was that little guy

in Peoria.

Oh, what's Peoria got to do with it?

What difference would it make

if he did come from Peoria?

- What difference does it make?

- What difference does it make?

Look, you better go back

to the nightclub and practice dancing.

I'll meet you for dinner. And don't

you worry about not being a big hit.

I'll shoot anyone

who doesn't like you.

Okay, kid.

Let's see, where were we?

- Peoria.

- Peoria.

- Peoria!

- Yeah.

Listen, Hotshot, eight years ago

in Peoria...

- Yeah?

...two private detectives...

LAWYER:

Mr. Laurel...

...I want you to think very carefully

before answering my next question.

Are you positive that this is the man

you identify...

...as the one who committed the crime?

It is quite important...

...that you answer

my question without prejudice.

Are you positive?

I'm positive

that I'm absolutely positive.

- Order in the court.

- I'm sorry, Your Honor...

...but I'm positively more positive...

...than he is positive.

Sit down, Mr. Hardy.

LAWYER:

Your Honor...

...that makes it doubly conclusive.

That closes the case.

Gentlemen of the jury...

...I leave the matter

entirely in your hands.

You've heard the evidence...

...the arguments by counsel

and last witness in rebuttal.

You may now retire.

- Your Honor, we've reached our verdict.

- Guilty!

You've convicted an innocent man!

I sentence you

to 20 years, hard labor.

I'm innocent, Your Honor,

I'm innocent!

I'll get you two guys...

...if it's the last thing I ever do.

- Ha-ha-ha-ha...

- Ha!

COLEMAN:
So you served 20 years

at hard labor, huh?

No.

After five years, the guilty man

confessed. I was released.

But I lost everything.

The lawyers took my fortune...

...my wife divorced me...

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