The Crook

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All the evil I'm doing

Will lead me to my ruin

Wait and see

Though my people destroy me

My fame will grow

The world will know

Of Le Voyou

VOYOU:
A Parisian expression

for gangster or hoodlum.

LE LITTRE:

Want something to drink?

A beer.

Without foam!

Thank you.

Are you hungry?

Yes.

What are you doing here?

Making an omelet.

No, I mean in Paris.

I work as a secretary. And you?

Are you in the habit of yanking

the telephone out of the wall?

When I don't know the people.

Want some wine?

I wouldn't mind some more beer,

if you've got some.

It's nice to know you trust me.

Aren't you eating?

No, I ate before the movies.

Do you go to the movies a lot?

Were you thinking of staying long?

Overnight, at least.

- When do you leave for work?

- I leave here at 8:00.

That's all I can do for you.

Anyone else got a key?

- Just the cleaning woman.

- Does she come every day?

Every other day.

Why are they looking for you?

You got anything to smoke?

- Why are you so nervous?

- I couldn't be calmer.

You don't have many visitors.

Now look, I have a car...

I'm willing to drive you anywhere.

Tomorrow you won't be going to work.

They'll want to know why I'm not there.

And since my telephone doesn't work,

they'll investigate.

You'll be sick.

- I haven't been sick in 10 years.

- Then obviously it's time you were.

Is the cleaning lady coming tomorrow?

Yes.

Tell her you won't be needing her.

Send her to your boss to explain.

- And have her bring the newspapers up.

- What on earth for?

Because you'll be sick.

Tell me...

do you plan on staying much longer?

You'd better be nice to me

because I've had a very trying day.

What's the matter with this?

She's very pretty.

So are you.

- May I give her a kiss?

- Franoise!

The gentleman wants to give you a kiss.

Thank you.

All right now, go and play with your friend.

- How were you able to find me?

- I'll tell you later.

Did the cops question you?

Yes, they have. They came to the house

right after you escaped from jail.

I said I didn't know anything but the truth.

Your husband?

He took it well.

He was afraid

because he thought you'd phone.

What does he take me for?

Where have you been for the last 15 days?

With a girl I know.

Do I know her?

No.

The night I escaped,

I ran into her by accident.

And she's hiding you.

Yes.

She hid you for 15 days?

At first I forced her, then she cooperated.

- Is she an old friend?

- Not at all.

You're sure you're not being followed?

They seem to think that I left the country.

You didn't lose much weight.

The girl I'm staying with cooks up a storm.

I want to kiss you so badly.

Did you hear?

My daughter is very beautiful.

What will you do now?

Now I'm really going to leave the country.

Why didn't you leave before?

I wanted to see her.

Do you need money?

We'll see.

What country will you go to?

I haven't decided yet.

- Do have a car?

- Yes.

Will you give me a lift?

There's someone I've got to see.

Yes, but I have to take her home first.

Franoise, did you hurt yourself?

How did you get to know him?

We met not long after Franoise was born,

on the Riviera.

Is he loaded, as they say?

You'd never believe

how much yogurt people eat.

You told him everything?

After your trial,

the entire country knew about you and me.

- Has he been good with Franoise?

- Yes, wonderful.

I suppose you're a yogurt fan now?

You know what surprises you most

when you get out of prison?

New clothes...

and the price of movie tickets.

What are you doing, Franoise?

She's only playing.

Is that your place?

It's a bit farther up the street,

but I'd rather not park any closer.

Give the nice man a kiss, Franoise.

Goodbye, sweetheart.

You're a good girl.

Come on, darling.

I'll only be a minute.

I like you better that way.

I was angry with you for a long time.

But eventually I saw your side.

I figured you were better off...

married to someone

rich, handsome, young, honest...

Is he really honest?

What I'll never quite understand

is why he married you.

Do you think she'll say anything?

I'm going to tell him anyhow.

I want you to drive. It's too risky this way.

Don't you want to kiss me?

I'd like you to drive.

- How much is this one?

- Four bills.

She's sweet, neat, and reliable.

- And this one?

- It's less.

But the problem is keeping her loaded.

It's an odd caliber.

Where are you going?

I want this one.

Nice balance.

How much?

Four bills.

How about throwing in some bullets?

You know,

I thought you skipped the country.

Well, go on thinking it.

I've got a job if you want.

I only work alone, you know that.

- Have you seen Martine?

- She's waiting in the car for me.

If I were you, I wouldn't treat her so nice.

If you were me, but you're not.

What are you going to do with this place?

I thought I'd open up a little club

for special tastes.

- I see you've been letting your hair grow.

- Don't you dig it on me?

It's all right.

Well, I'll see you.

I got to put this stuff away.

You know the way out.

Which will it be?

That one.

Well, intellectual.

- You still have an official source of supply?

- Yeah, sure.

The bastards keep upping the price.

Know what a full set comes to now?

- Have you seen Martine?

- She's waiting outside.

You know what you're doing.

How's Charles?

- Great, still eats like a horse.

- Good old Charles.

There we are.

What name shall I put down

for you this time?

Edouard Faures. Spelled with an "S."

NAME:
FAURE

- Always the name of a big wheel.

- Impresses the cops.

With an "S," I said.

I don't want to be hauled in

for impersonation.

- You feel like playing poker tonight?

- No, I better not.

I guess you're right.

How many driver's licenses

do you want me to make?

Two. One with a mustache and one without.

I threw in a vaccination certificate.

You're vaccinated for everything:

Smallpox, cholera, the works.

Thanks, doc.

Will you let me borrow your car?

Yes, of course.

In a day or two,

it will turn up at one of the borders.

Take care of yourself, Simon.

Your escape was great.

Thanks.

We'll have our coffee now.

Do you know what this is?

It's a yogurt.

- The world's very first yogurt in a can.

- I saw Simon.

I'll look in on Franoise. Excuse me.

The papers said

he must have left the country.

It's amazing how wrong they can be.

I saw him this afternoon at the park.

Was Franoise with you?

I set up a lawyer's practice

after I got my degree.

It's true.

My first client seemed like a nice person...

someone who dropped out of the blue

because he thought I was brilliant.

"I'm known as the Al Capone of France,"

he said.

"I'm a gangster,

and I'm called the Al Capone of France.

"Now, since you're a young lawyer,

I have a proposal for you.

"To hire you by the year.

"You'll be paid quite a lot,

just as long as I'm free.

"As soon as I go to prison,

you won't be paid."

- It's true. What, you don't believe me?

- It's unbelievable.

Then he said to me, "You'll be my adviser...

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