The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby: Them Page #3

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Apparently.

Why do you have your shoes on in bed?

Morning, sunshine.

Mom's making French toast.

All right, I'll be right down.

OK.

You came in late last night.

What's with the feast?

We have a special guest star.

Outside.

But it's been hard.

There's a barrier...

Good morning.

- No f***ing way.

- El...

You sandbagged me.

He chairs the Psychology Department.

Good for him.

Well, I just thought he'd be

a bit more qualified to...

...to deal with your circumstance.

- What's my circumstance?

He was my grandson.

I lost him, too.

None of us know how to help you.

Well, neither do I.

I'm so glad they delegated

the speech to you.

He's not a stranger

that some hospital referred you to.

He's a colleague of mine.

I don't think one session

a week would hurt.

Why can't you talk to me

once a week, Dad?

- Why outsource it?

- I'm not outsourcing it,

and I don't really think you want

to talk to me about it.

I don't need to talk

to another therapist.

Eleanor...

Please, stop reminding me

that something's wrong.

That's... not my intention.

Then... please let me

stop thinking about it.

Tragedy is a foreign country.

We don't know

how to talk to the natives.

What are you talking about?

You know, there's this

really cool thing called chairs.

Yeah, I heard about those.

It's actually not too shabby down here.

You OK?

Sure.

Liar.

Sure.

When's your next class?

It's yours.

Oh.

Do you like hamburgers?

I used to be a vegan.

Mostly 'cause my husband was a vegan.

Not that I don't agree with most

of the tenets of vegan ideology, but...

...he was one

of those reformed socialists

who seemed sexy

before the '60s started to fade.

Does he teach?

He won tenure at University of Oregon,

and I got it here.

He went soft, I stayed hard.

That was that.

- You have kids?

- A son.

I'm not sure why people have kids.

You know, first there's

the nine months of agony,

your body hurts, it's hot, it's cold,

you crave pickles,

and there's no words to describe

whatever the f*** labor is.

And then this little stranger comes out,

sucking every bit of life

you have left in you,

and as soon as you're ready to jump out

of a window, all of a sudden he smiles.

Jesus Christ, this is good.

And whatever you do,

however you do it,

however you imagine your child's life,

or what kind of parent you'd be,

29 years later,

he's in some shrink's office

accusing you of some stupid thing

that you said or did

that for the life of you

you can't remember saying or doing.

Tell me at your age, you're not

taking classes out of boredom.

I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

What was before this?

- Life in general.

- Any kids?

Mmm-hmm.

Boy or girl?

- Boy.

- Good luck.

Thanks.

Who's that man who chased you

out of my classroom the other day?

He went soft, I stayed hard.

That was that.

- Well, it's been real, everybody.

- No, it hasn't.

Hey. Goddamn it.

Slow night?

Couple of people came in

to use the bathroom.

How we doing?

Well, aside from being

an endangered species, not so good.

Can you translate that for me, please?

Friday night, it's the only night

we're making any money.

I... I've missed some bills,

and we can't cover the overhead.

- I see.

- Yeah.

You got a plan B?

Burger King?

Seriously. Come on,

I want to show you something.

- This is the spreadsheet from...

- No, no, I can't. Um...

Oh.

You got protection?

Shh.

- Viagra?

- Please, be quiet.

- Want me to hold your hand?

- Shut your mouth.

- Can I watch?

- Shut up.

Dude, I'm being serious. Shut up.

I believe.

- In what?

- A higher power. Can you hear it?

Not right now.

- Later.

- Bye.

- Bye.

- You guys have fun.

- You know, I got a plan B.

- Oh, yeah?

You know what,

you can get out of here.

I was thinking about getting

my real estate license.

- What?

- Mmm-hmm.

Why would...

Why would you do something like that?

Uh, 'cause it seems more impressive

than pouring drinks.

Does it? What happened

to your life in the arts?

Oh, that'll probably phase in to a

Sunday afternoon hobby kind of thing.

You?

Plus, I think it's kind of indecent

to have things so worked out

that they wind up exactly

like you thought they would.

Oh.

Are you gonna be OK?

Probably.

We live in a world full of probablys.

Well...

I'm a decent listener...

if you ever want to talk about,

you know... whatever.

Talking about whatever's overrated.

I prefer just to, you know,

let things stew inside of me,

then have a violent out...

What'd you do that for?

It just seemed like the next

interesting thing to do.

I'm kind of married.

Yeah, I don't mind.

I kind of do.

- Uh, there's nobody looking.

- You know, in another life, I...

Mmm, we shouldn't even...

When's the last time that

you got laid properly?

Oh, f***, I can already

taste the regret.

Well, stop thinking,

because it's not healthy for you.

- Alexis?

- Yes?

Tomorrow's gonna be awkward.

Probably.

Oh.

What the...

I'm sorry.

I wasn't expecting you.

No, no, no.

No, I wasn't expecting me,

either, so...

- Hi.

- Hey.

Is she here?

No.

Is she living here?

Do you want to come in for a second?

Would that be all right?

Yeah, come in.

OK.

Can I ask how she's doing?

I don't know, to be completely honest.

As good as she can be.

Do I seem like

a different person to you?

Do you feel like a different person?

Kind of.

You look the same to me.

You know I didn't like you when Eleanor

first brought you out here for dinner.

However long ago it was.

How long ago was it?

Seven years.

- Seven years?

- Yeah.

You sat there in the exact same spot

seven years ago,

with a glass of water because you were

afraid to have a drink in front of me.

This obnoxiously perfect kid who walked

off with my daughter's attention.

You grew on me, though.

Oh, well...

It's true.

Look, I...

I don't want to interfere

with your life,

or whatever she has to do,

but I can't...

I can't just chalk this up to destiny.

I walked on with my life because...

moving forward was the only way to go.

I guess people grieve differently.

I wish there was some appropriate,

articulate thing to say,

but I just wanted the mundane

daily bullshit back.

I think Eleanor wanted something else.

And I think that, um...

...there was nothing appropriate

about any of this.

Hey.

Guess what?

What?

I got asked out on a date.

I feel fat.

Katy, shut up.

You're not fat.

That's gorgeous.

Goddamn it!

Uh, excuse me?

Hey, come in here.

What was that?

This keeps breaking off.

OK, but we don't say that, lovey.

Why?

'Cause it's not a nice thing to say.

Are you sure that you're OK

to watch him?

Mom and Dad should be back pretty soon.

He's here.

Are you sure?

Yes, I'm positive.

- Change.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, what do you want to do?

What do you want to do?

Can I get electrocuted

by lightning bugs?

No, they're harmless.

This song is horrible.

- It's not good.

- It's not.

I think that bad music turns you on.

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