The Emperor Jones Page #4

say somethin' about a partnership -

Coconut! Pineapple!

Fine fat chicken all ready for the tooth!

Raisins and new corn!

Coconut! Pineapple!

Great big chicken all ready for the tooth!

Pineapplel

Big fat chicken ready for the toothl

Good day, Mr. Smithers.

Maybe a coconut?

Yes, good day.

How do, Mr. Smithers?

How have you been?

- I'm sure glad to see ya.

- How do you do?

Why don't you come in

and pay your bill?

That's Mr. Smithers.

You know, every time

I rides up here through that jungle...

it gives me the creeps.

Say, you notice

they shut the gates after us?

Look a-here, white man,

is your nerves slippin'?

Well, I don't like it.

If you had to recruit an army for him,

why did you have to get such big blokes?

Yes, them is fine n*ggers.

I betcha they knows a man

when they sees one.

Well, if there's any trouble,

you've only got yourself to blame...

salutin' him and callin' him " General."

I tell you, Mr. Smithers. There's any trouble,

you just leave the general to me.

Us n*ggers understands each other.

Tell him Mr. Smithers.

- You know, you gotta be diplomatic.

- Take it easy.

- Mr. Smithers to see Your Excellency.

- Show the gentlemen in.

Well, good day to you,

Your Majesty.

Well, well. Top-hole, eh?

Top-hole.

As fine a body of men as ever

I clapped me peepers on.

- Eh, what, Jones?

- Right.

Yeah. And well found...

if I says it meself

as fitted 'em out, eh?

Good.

Well, General, you got a swell army.

And I reckons, when you figure

how little it's costin' ya...

makes ya feel mighty proud.

Send in the treasurer.

This my treasurer.

Tell the general the truth now -

Does you know how to figure?

Yes, Your Highness.

Now, you see, I got a figurer.

Produce the contract.

Your bill, Mr. Smithers.

Well, here you are,

Your Excellency.

Now, then, there was a hundred uniforms

at five dollars. That's a thousand dollars.

There was a hundred rifles at five dollars.

A thousand dollars.

One cannon was five hundred,

and the ammuni -

Well, it adds up to $4,000,

Your Excellency.

What does the treasurer report?

It seems to me

that there might be a little error.

Ah, well, here,

let me have a look at it.

Yes, we all make mistakes

now and again.

Here, Smithers - the mistake.

I seen it all along.

It's... $5,000.

There you is, cap'n.

Check that off and tell it to the boss.

Fire.

Fire again. Empty your gun.

Don't you all knows

I's got a charm?

Takes a silver bullet

to kill Brutus Jones!

My turn now, General.

Company! Attention!

Take this bush n*gger

and throw him outta here.

I'm boss here now.

All of you, get outta here.

And wait.

Them what I wants to stay

will hear from me in an hour.

Smithers, you wait.

I wants to confer with you.

Well, blimey!

If you ain't pulled it off!

- You have got a nerve.

- Nerve... and brains.

I calls it stinkin' luck - havin' that n*gger

miss you twice at 10 feet.

Pick up that gun.

Break it.

Blanks. Blimey. How...

You remember when Quaco

got drunk in town last night...

and I takes care of his gun

while he sleeps it off?

Well, that's what I call brains.

Phew! This place smells more like

a chain gang dump than a palace.

Say, Smithers, how ya likes the contract

for doin' this dump over?

Now you're talkin'.

And don't make the mistake of thinkin'

you's dealin' with any ignorant bush n*gger.

I gives you an audience tomorrow.

And bring along them fashion sheets

that I gets last summer.

And then I wants mirrors -

plenty of'em.

And remember, Smithers,

red's my color.

I always had a special taste for red.

Mr. President.

No.

King Brutus.

No. Somehow that don't

make enough noise.

Smithers, cigarette.

Light.

Smithers...

you has just had an audience

with the EmperorJones.

My sash.

Watch that foot.

Give me a drink.

My coat.

Brush it off.

Tell Smithers I'll sees him here.

Clear out, all of ya.

Your Majesty.

Well, Smithers,

what's on your mind this mornin'?

Remember what I told ya when you

slapped that last tax on coffee -

that you were cuttin'

your own bloomin' throat?

Sure. I remembers.

What of it?

There was a riot

down on the village last night...

and your tax collector got beaten up

so his own mother wouldn't know 'im.

Oh, that's old stuff.

My army's got them n*ggers already.

And I'm gonna dress 'em down

before the whole court this mornin'.

- They all needs a lesson.

- Too late to give 'em a lesson now, me lad.

You've got 'em squeezed dry.

Look a-here. When I takes this job,

what I tells ya?

I says three years for my cleanup,

don't I?

Well, we's got six months to go.

Them's my arrangements,

and I ain't gonna change.

I suppose you got your money

hid away safe, eh?

I sure has.

And it's banked in a foreign land where

they ain't no chain gangs and no jim crow...

and nobody can't get it except me.

In six months,

I walks out on this n*gger circus.

And from then on,

I's top dog.

Top dog, eh?

Look a-here, white man.

There's little stealin',

like you does...

and there's big stealin',

like I does.

For little stealin',

they get you in jail sooner or later.

For the big stealin',

they makes you emperor...

and puts you in the hall of fame

when you croaks.

Well, all I know is that it's a wise gambler

that knows when to quit.

Look a-here, white man.

Do you think I ain't still got

these n*ggers like that?

You think when I cracks the whip,

they don't jump through?

All right, I shows ya.

I'll summon the court.

His Majesty is on the throne.

Summon the court.

"Archduke and Duchess of Manhattan."

"Marquis and Marchioness of Newark."

"Marquis and Marchioness

of Baton Rouge."

"Lord and Lady Baltimore."

"Lord and Lady Richmond."

And all points

in His Majesty's kingdom...

north, south, east and west.

And Mr. Smithers.

Bring in the prisoners.

So you's the n*ggers what takes it

upon yourself to start a roughhouse...

then beat up

an officer of the crown?

Well, I see I been too easy

on you n*ggers.

Now I'm gonna show ya

who's boss around here.

Lieutenant.

Take them n*ggers in the courtyard

and give 'em 50 lashes apiece.

And lock 'em up.

I said lock 'em up!

Forward march.

Captain.

Take your company

to the five-mile village...

and burn it

off the face of the earth!

Everything!

Understand?

Right face!

Forward march!

March!

Who dare whistle that way

in my palace?

Who dare wake up the emperor?

I'll get the hides

frayed off some of you n*ggers sure.

It was me whistled to ya.

I got news for ya.

Oh, it's you, Mr. Smithers.

What news you got to tell me?

Where's all your court -

the generals

and the cabinet ministers and all?

Oh, they mostly runs

the minute I closes my eyes.

Drinkin' rum,

talkin' big down in the town.

How come you don't know that?

Ain't you sousin' with them

most every day?

- I got to, in my business, ain't I?

- Your business.

Blimey. When you landed here,

you didn't have no high-and-mighty airs.

Talk polite, white man.

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