The English Patient Page #16

KIP:

Brick platform opposite the old

Ajaib-Gher -

THE PATIENT:

#NAME?

natives called the Lahore Museum.

KIP:

It's still there, the cannon, outside the

museum. It was made of metal cups

and bowls taken from every household

in the city as tax, then melted down.

Then later they fired the cannon at my

people - comma - The natives.

THE PATIENT:

So what do you really object to - the

writer or what he's writing about?

KIP:

What I really object to, Uncle, is

your finishing all my condensed milk.

(snatching up the empty can)

And the message everywhere in your

book - however slowly I read it - that

the best destiny for India is to be ruled

by the British.

THE PATIENT:

Hana, we have discovered a shared

please - the boy and I.

HANA:

Arguing about books.

THE PATIENT:

Condensed milk - one of the truly

great inventions.

KIP:

(grinning, leaving)

I'll get another tin.

Hana and the Patient are alone.

HANA:

I didn't like that book either. It's

all about men. Too many men.

Just like this house.

THE PATIENT:

You like him, don't you? Your

voice changes.

HANA:

I don't think it does.

(a beat)

Anyway, he's indifferent to me.

THE PATIENT:

I don't think it's indifference.

Kip comes bounding in with a fresh can.

THE PATIENT:

Hana was just telling me that you

were indifferent -

HANA:

(appalled)

Hey! -

THE PATIENT:

#NAME?

KIP:

Well, I'm indifferent to cooking, not

Hana's cooking in particular.

(stabbing at the tin with a bayonet)

Have either of you ever tried

condensed milk sandwiches?

125DELETED.

126.INT. THE PATIENT'S ROOM. MORNING.

Caravaggio and the Patient are singing - an Arab song which they both

know from Cairo days. THUNDER accompanies them. It's pouring.

Suddenly the door is flung open and HANA, KIP and HARDY appear. They

have the stretcher with them.

127*.EXT. THE MONASTERY CLOISTERS. MORNING.

A whoop precedes THE HEADLONG RUSH OF KIP, HARDLY and CARAVAGGIO as

they cart the Patient across the Cloisters like manic stretcher-

bearers. Hana is with them, holding an umbrella over the Patient who

bounces uncomfortably. He is nervous, a little giddy. The rain

buckets down.

THE PATIENT:

(no irony)

Careful - careful!

127a*.EXT. THE MONASTERY GARDEN. MORNING.

The storm tour includes a trip around the pond. The Patient pushes

away the umbrella, lets the rain drench him. He grins at Hana.

THE PATIENT:

This is wonderful!

KIP:

(to Hana)

What's he saying?

HANA:

He's saying it's wonderful!

128*.INT. LIBRARY OF THE DEPARTMENT OF EGYPTOLOGY. DAY.

Madox and Alm�sy are camped in one corner of THE LIBRARY, hunched over

their maps and papers and journals and clashing furiously over the site

of the next part of the expedition.

MADOX:

(pushing away his charts)

And I'm telling you there's nothing

there to explore.

ALM�SY

No, because you can't see from the air!

If you could explore from the air life

would be very simple!

(he yanks up a map)

Look! What is that? Is that a wadi?

That whole spur is a real possibility...

MADOX:

Which we've overflown twice.

ALM�SY

Which we couldn't explore because

of rocks, because of cross-winds,

it's sloppy.

(stabbing another location)

And here - and here - we could be

staring at Zerzura.

Other readers look over at this unseemly skirmish.

MADOX:

So - on Thursday you don't trust

Bell's map - Bell was a fool, Bell

couldn't draw a map, but on Friday

he's suddenly infallible?

Alm�sy is surprised by Madox' anger.

MADOX:

And where are the Expedition Maps?

ALM�SY

In my room.

MADOX:

Those maps belong to His Majesty's

Government. They're confidential.

They shouldn't be left lying around

for any Tom, Dick or Mary to have

sight of.

ALM�SY

What's the matter with you?

MADOX:

Don't be so bloody na�ve. You know

there's a war breaking out.

(he tosses a slip of paper onto

the map, recites its message)

This arrived this morning. By order

of the British Government - all

International Expeditions to be

aborted by May 1939.

129INT. CAIRO STREET. DAY.

Alm�sy and Madox walk down this busy and rather narrow street without

pavements. Both of them somber.

ALM�SY

Why do they care about our maps?

MADOX:

What do we find in the desert? Arrow

heads, spears. In a war, if you own the

desert, you own North Africa.

ALM�SY

(contemptuous)

Own the desert.

Alm�sy hesitates at a junction, clearly about to take leave of Madox.

ALM�SY

That place at the base of a woman's

throat? You know - the hollow - here -

does that have an official name?

Madox looks at him.

MADOX:

For God's sake, man - pull

yourself together.

130INT. OPEN-AIR CINEMA. CAIRO. EVENING.

The OPEN-AIR CINEMA is just beginning its evening programme.

PATHE NEWS BEGINS and we date the event to April 1939. Stories of

imminent war jostle with images of Merrie England. Village greens,

sporting victories, Cruft's Dog Show. Alone among the necking couples

- mostly soldiers with their Egyptian girlfriends - in an otherwise

empty block, is Katharine. She's waiting for Alm�sy. A SOLDIER comes

over to Katharine's row and settles a couple of seats away from her.

SOLDIER:

Beggin your pardon, miss, but have

you got a lighter?

Katharine lights his cigarette and returns to the screen. An item

about Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers and TOP HAT. The stars do their

stuff. The soldier moves a seat nearer.

SOLDIER:

(leering)

I love Ginger, she's a foxy girl, ain't she?

KATHARINE:

F*** off.

SOLDIER:

What?

KATHARINE:

You heard me.

The Soldier slinks off, muttering. Katharine is wretched. She sits

head down, not watching the screen, marooned in her despair about

duplicity, sordid assignations.

Alm�sy arrives, slides in beside Katharine, his shadow momentarily

large across the screen.

ALM�SY

Sorry.

They watch the screen. Katharine is weeping. Alm�sy doesn't

understand. He puts his arm around her.

KATHARINE:

I can't do this, I can't do this any more.

131*.EXT. GROPPI PARK. CAIRO. EVENING.

A man walks round with A HAND BELL - announcing that the Park is

closing. He turns off the gaslights which illuminate the animal cages.

Alm�sy and Katharine sit stiffly on a bench. They don't speak. Alm�sy

puts his hands to his head, he rubs his shoulders. The lights are

gradually being extinguished around them.

Finally, Katharine gets up.

KATHARINE:

I'd better get back.

(she keeps him away with a hand)

Say goodbye here.

ALM�SY

I'm not agreeing. Don't think I'm

agreeing, because I'm not.

They stand, awkward. Katharine rehearses her position. The bell

clangs.

KATHARINE:

I just know - any minute he'll find out,

we'll barge into somebody we'll - and it

will ill him.

ALM�SY

Don't go over it again, please.

He takes her hands, lays his cheeks into them, then releases them, gets

up, walks away. She walks towards the gate. He calls after her.

ALM�SY

Katharine -

He walks towards her, his smile awful.

ALM�SY

I just wanted you to know.

I'm not missing you yet.

She nods, can't find this funny.

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