The Fault in Our Stars Page #23

MICHAEL:

(NODS)

Mrs. Waters told us the night

before you left.

(BEAT)

I'm sorry Hazel.

They sit for a beat. Tears form in Michael's eyes.

HAZEL:

You're not gonna say it?

MICHAEL:

What's that?

HAZEL:

The usual. "Everything happens for

a reason..."

Michael shakes his head.

MICHAEL:

I don't know, Haze.

(BEAT)

I always thought being an adult

meant knowing what you believe...

(BEAT)

... that has not been my

experience.

Hazel understands exactly. CUT TO:

87.

INT GUS'S BASEMENT BEDROOM - DAY

Gus lays in bed, eyes open, a PICC line now being fed through

a port in his chest. Chemotherapy at work.

Hazel and Isaac are keeping him company.

HAZEL:

How are your eyes?

ISAAC:

Great. Wonderful. I mean, they're

not in my head is the only problem.

GUS:

I hate to one-up you but... seems

my entire body is made out of

cancer now, so...

Isaac nods. Tries not to get emotional but it's happening. He

goes to touch Gus's arm and accidentally touches his thigh.

GUS:

Whoa, I'm taken.

Isaac laughs.

ISAAC:

(to Hazel, re:
Gus)

Did you write his eulogy yet?

Hazel is confused.

GUS:

Dude.

ISAAC:

What?

GUS:

I haven't asked her.

ISAAC:

Oh.

(BEAT)

Oops.

HAZEL:

What are you talking about?

ISAAC:

My bad.

HAZEL:

(STILL CONFUSED)

Augustus?

Gus looks at her, grows a little serious.

88.

GUS:

I need speakers at my funeral. I

thought maybe you and Isaac... but

especially you --

ISAAC:

Hey!

GUS:

Would you be kind enough to whip

something up?

HAZEL:

(touches his hand)

It would be an honor.

They hold holds.

ISAAC:

You guys are adorable.

Hazel play slaps Isaac on the arm.

HAZEL:

How's your love life? Anything from

Monica?

ISAAC:

Not a word.

HAZEL:

She hasn't even like, texted to ask

how you're doing?

He shakes his head. Gus gets an angry look on his face.

HAZEL:

That is so messed up!

ISAAC:

I've stopped thinking about it.

Moving on. There's a new girl in

Support Group with these humongous -

Isaac gestures to his chest. Hazel is confused.

HAZEL:

How do you even know that?

ISAAC:

I'm blind but I'm not that blind.

GUS:

Hazel Grace!

They turn to him.

GUS:

Do you happen to have four dollars?

89.

No one knows what that means. CUT TO:

INT HAZEL'S CAR - LATER

Gus is in the passenger's seat. Isaac sits in the back. Hazel

returns to the car. With a CARTON OF EGGS.

HAZEL:

Ok now what?

Gus smiles. CUT TO:

EXT SUBURBAN STREET - MOMENTS LATER

Hazel, Gus, and Isaac lean against Hazel's car staring

something down.

ISAAC:

Is it there?

GUS:

Oh it's there.

REVEAL they're looking at Monica's green Firebird.

ISAAC:

She's in the house?

GUS:

Who cares where she is? This is not

about her. This is about you.

(sticks out his hand)

Hazel...

Hazel nods, opens the egg carton, hands Gus an egg. Gus puts

it in Isaac's hands. Positions Isaac - who, of course, can't

see a thing - towards the Firebird.

Isaac winds up and tosses the EGG.

It misses the car by a mile. After a beat:

ISAAC:

I didn't hear anything.

GUS:

A little to the left.

ISAAC:

My throw was to the left or I

should aim to the left?

GUS:

Aim left.

Isaac turns his shoulders.

90.

GUS:

Lefter.

Isaac turns some more.

GUS:

Yes! Excellent! And throw hard.

Gus hands him a SECOND EGG. Isaac winds up and hurls it -

missing the car again but hitting the HOUSE.

GUS:

Bullseye!

ISAAC:

Really?

GUS:

No you missed it by like 20 feet.

(hands him a THIRD)

Try one more time.

Isaac hurls it, this time smashing the car's taillight.

Isaac's face lights up.

HAZEL:

Woo hoo!

Isaac grabs for ANOTHER EGG. Throws it. Then ANOTHER. He's a

throwing machine. Most of them miss but at least he's

enjoying himself. Finally there's a DIRECT HIT on the car

door, triggering the alarm. Isaac pauses.

GUS:

Keep throwing, keep throwing!

Isaac does. Gus smiles, putting an unlit cigarette in his

mouth. Hazel watches him, enjoying this moment.

Eventually, MONICA'S MOM opens the front door and comes out.

MONICA'S MOM

What in God's name --

Seeing Hazel, Gus, and Isaac, she stops in her tracks.

GUS:

Are you Monica's mom?

MONICA'S MOM

(CONFUSED)

I am.

GUS:

Hello ma'am. Your daughter has done

an injustice and we've come here

seeking revenge. We may not look

like much. Between the three of us,

we have five legs, four eyes, and

two and a half working lungs.

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