The Fifth Element Page #12

LOC RHOD:

(speedy, in rhythm)

Korben Dallas! Here he is The most hated

man in the universe. The one and only winner

of the Gemini Croquette contest! Ladies, start

melting 'cause the boy's hot! Hot! Hot! The boy

is perfect..

(he feels his muscles)

...The right size, right build, right hair. Right on!

Say something-to those 50 billion pair of ears out

there D-man!

An ASSISTANT hands a totally lost Korben a mike.

KORBEN:

(hesitant)

...Hi.

LOC RHOD:

Does it get any better or what!

Loc Rhod grabs Korben's arm and leads him down the hallway, as fast as

the music.

LOC RHOD:

...Quiver ladies, he's gonna set the world on

fire right here from 5 to 7! You'll know

everything there is to know about the D-man.

His dreams, his desires, his most intimate of

intimates. And from what I'm looking at

intimate is the stud muffin's middle name.

So tell me my main man... you nervous in the

service?

KORBEN:

Uh... not really.

Loc Rhod lets go of Korben's arm and grabs the Stewardess.

LOC RHOD:

Freeze those knees, my chickadees, 'cause

Korben is on the case with a major face...

Loc Rhod rubs up against the stewardess.

LOC RHOD:

...Start drooling, ladies! My man here is a

sharp-tongued Sire who's gonna stroke your

every desire.

They come to an intersection. The airline company has prepared drinks

for them. Loc Rhod pushes on, grabs a glass of champagne, scribbles his

autograph.

LOC RHOD:

Yesterday's unknown will be tomorrow's Prince

of Fhloston Paradise, the hotel of a thousand and

one follies, home of luxury and beauty. A magic

fountain flowing with non-stop wine, women and

Bootchie Koochie Koo...

He tosses away his champagne glass.

LOC RHOD:

Beware out there puppy dogs my man is on

the prowl. Owwww!

Howling, Loc Rhod grabs another stewardess by the arm.

LOC RHOD:

...And start licking your stamps little girls,

this guy's gonna have you writing home to

Momma! Tomorrow from 5 to 7, I'll be your

voice, your tongue and I'll be hot on the tail

of the sexiest man of the year... D-man...

Your man... My man.

The stewardess shivers. A BEEP is heard.

VOCODER (O.S.)

End of transmission.

The MUSIC suddenly stops. Several assistants come and compliment Loc

Rhod who sighs, lights up a cigarette, and drops his pretense.

LOC RHOD:

Korben sweetheart do me a favor I know this

is probably the biggest thing that ever happened

to you in your inconsequential life. But I've got

a show to do here and it's got to pop. So tomorrow,

when we're on air, give me a hand... Try to make

believe you have more than a one word vocabulary.

OK pal?

That does it. Korben grabs him by the collar and drags him into a

corner.

Loc Rhod's feet don't touch the ground.

KORBEN:

(pissed)

I didn't come here to play Dumbo on the radio.

So tomorrow between 5 and 7 give yourself a

hand, that clear pal?

LOC RHOD:

(petrified)

Crystal.

124INT. AIRPORT

The Check-in attendant has two more tickets in her hand.

CHECK-IN ATTENDANT

(alter a moment, reading)

...Mr. Dallas... Korben Dallas?

Zorg's Right Arm gives her a big smile.

RIGHT ARM:

That's right.

The attendant scans the ID with a yellow beam, it checks out, and the

blue light reveals no other face but his.

CHECK-IN ATTENDANT

The problem is I only have one Korben Dallas on

my list... and he's already checked in.

Right Arm's smile shatters.

RIGHT ARM:

That's impossible! He's in j... I mean, there

must be some mistake. I have my ticket!

I'm the real Korben Dallas!

A shrill BELL rings out.

CHECK-IN ATTENDANT

(smiling)

I'm sorry, sir, boarding is finished.

The attendant hits a button. A thick window slowly slides up between

them.

Right Arm totally loses it.

RIGHT ARM:

I want to see your boss! Get rid of this

f***ing window! Somebody's made a

mistake, goddamnit!

He pounds on the counter with both fists. A steel curtain comes down.

Red sighting beams target spots on his body, ten gun barrels protrude from

the wall, all aimed at him.

VOICE (O.S.)

This is not an exercise. This is a police

control.

Put your hands in the nearest yellow circles...

RIGHT ARM:

(slowing down)

Sorry, my fault... Just a little overexcited...

that's all... I'm calm now.

125INT. SHUTTLE - DAY

Korben makes his way in the plane looking for his seat. No more seats in

modern planes, just individual travel boxes lined up like microwaves. He

passes STEWARD holding his bloodied nose. He has found what he is looking

for. He enters to.... Leeloo quietly stretched out in front of a computer

screen. Korben slips in beside her. Leeloo in concentrating on the words

that scroll rapidly past her on the screen. He doesn't understand what she

is doing.

LEELOO:

Apipoulai!

KORBEN:

Not hard to find you...just follow the

Chaos...

Leeloo smiles, as if complimented.

KORBEN:

Leeloo, listen to me... these tickets...

they're not mine... I mean they are, but

not for vacation like everyone thinks...

I'm on an operation... and if I didn't come

get you, you'd be in a shitload of trouble...

I'd love to be on vacation with you...

but now.... now I've got to work...

And Leeloo... I would love to work in peace.

Leeloo types in "LOVE" on the keyboard.

LEELOO:

Love...

KORBEN:

Yes! But "love" isn't the operative word

here, PEACE is!

Leeloo types in this new word.

LEELOO:

(rather pleased)

Peace... and love...

She brings up a picture of a 60's style Hippie flashing a peace sign.

Korben sighs and switches off the screen.

KORBEN:

Sometimes you can't learn everything

from a screen..sometimes it's better to

ask someone who has experience..

LEELOO:

(quite happy)

What is... Make Love?

Korben just stares at her for a few minutes.

KORBEN:

Know what? On that subject maybe you'd

be better off asking the screen.

He turns the computer back on.

ANGLE ON:

A STEWARDESS walks up the aisle of the shuttle pushing the red buttons on

top of each individual box.

VOICE (O.S.)

...to make your flight as short and agreeable

as possible, our flight attendants are switching

on the timing sleeper which will regulate your

sleep during the trip...

ANGLE ON:

LEELOO:

(switching off the screen)

OK! Finished!

KORBEN:

Finished what?

LEELOO:

Learning language.

KORBEN:

Which one?

LEELOO:

All 900.

Korben doesn't know if he should laugh or not.

KORBEN:

You learned 900 languages in five

minutes?!

LEELOO:

(pleased)

Yes! Now it's your turn! I learned your

language, you have to learn mine!

KORBEN:

I know how to say "Hello". Teach me how

to say "Good-bye", that's all I need.

LEELOO:

Apipoussan!

KORBEN:

Apipoussan?

LEELOO:

Good! Do you know how we say "make love"?

KORBEN:

(fumbling)

Uh...

LEELOO:

...Hoppi-hoppa.

Korben literally melts.

KORBEN:

(to himself)

Help...

Luckily, a stewardess smiles at him through the box window.

STEWARDESS:

Sweet dreams, Mr. Dallas!

The stewardess sets the timing sleeper. Korben and Leeloo immediately

fall asleep.

A STEWARDESS at the other end of the shuttle has a problem.

STEWARDESS 2

Mr. Loc Rhod you have to assume

your individual position.

LOC RHOD:

(hugging her)

I don't want an individual position,

I want all positions!

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