The Flintstones

FADE IN:

1 EXT. SLATE QUARRY -DAY 1

FRED FLINTSTONE, archetypical Everyman, sits atop his

faithful heavy-equipment dinosaur, cranking the winch

that makes the mighty beast rip and tear into the quarry

wall.

2 THE QUARRY FOREMAN 2

looks down at his wristwatch. Well... actually, it's a

wrist sundial. And it's magic time... quittin' time...

Millerock time!

Now the foreman turns from his watch to a steam whistle

bird, and yanks its tail. The BIRD SQUAWKS the end of

the workday -3

ANOTHER ANGLE 3

FRED:

YABBA DABBA DO --!

Fred happily discards his hard hat, leaps out of the

canvas-roofed cab on the dino's back, slides down the

tail and bounces right into the seat of his stone and

timber car! He gets up to a running start with the only

motor (his feet), slows to allow a "time clock" dinosaur

to punch his stone timecard, and then he's trotting back

up to speed and out of the gate! MUSIC comes UP and

OVER -MUSIC

(V.O.)

'Flintstones,

Meet the Flintstones,

They're a modern

Stone age fam-i-ly --'

--And so forth, as for the first time in "his-tor-y" we

see the Flintstones' OPENING CREDITS live!

4 TIGHT ON A MAILBOX 4

reading "FLINTSTONE." We WIDEN as Fred SKIDS to a halt

in the driveway of his three-bedroom ranch cave. A

moment later, WILMA and PEBBLES run out --both looking

just like they should --and get into the car. A beat

behind them are the Flintstone pets, Dino and the

saber-toothed cat.

Fred pauses, looks around... HONKS his HORN... BARNEY,

BETTY and BAM-BAM come out of the neighboring house, hop

in!

(CONTINUED)

2.

4 CONTINUED:
4

Fred's feet slap on the street as the car starts

up -

MUSIC (V.O.)

'From the

Town of Bedrock

They're a page right

Out of his-tor-y --'

5 DRIVE-IN MOVIE THEATRE -DUSK 5

Fred and company pull in. He takes a giant sea shell

"speaker" off of its wooden stand and hooks it to his

car door. He leans over, puts his arm around Wilma.

(In the back seat, Dino pops his head up, tearing through

the canvas top.) Dino picks up Pebbles and Bam-Bam and

puts them on his head for a better view. CAMERA ZOOMS IN

ON the drive-in screen and the words that America has

waited twenty-five years to see in 70mm Dolby(TM) drop-

your-popcorn reality:

THE FLINTSTONES:

And as the MAIN CREDITS ROLL, we -

DISSOLVE TO:

6 AN EERIE CARBONIFEROUS FOREST -DAWN 6

Dew drips from strange multi-leafed plants. Giant

DRAGONFLIES BUZZ AND HUM to and fro. Bubbles rise from

a still pond, and weird lungfish move onto the land.

(The third one out carries a little suitcase.)

CAMERA PANS PAST the lungfish TO a muddy shore. With a

DRAMATIC MUSICAL STING, we DISCOVER a set of strange,

hideous clawprints. The CAMERA FOLLOWS these, then

WIDENS to reveal the make of these footprints: A seven-

foot tall and fearful beast we will call the Xenosaurus.

It looks around menacingly. (Oddly, it's carrying a

canvas sack, but we don't stress this.)

Suddenly a garbage truck appears out of nowhere and runs

over the Xenosaurus.

7 NEW ANGLE 7

Dazed, the Xenosaurus gets up. As it does, we realize

that we aren't deep in some primeval forest, but on the

shoulder of a gravel highway. A stone road sign reads

BEDROCK 1/2 MILE. ROCK VEGAS, BABYLON & EDEN NEXT THREE

EXITS. Now, the CAMERA CRANES UP ABOVE the sign and

we see --Bedrock!

(CONTINUED)

3.

7 CONTINUED:
7

Nestled incongruously in a savage landscape, the charming

protosuburbia gleams in the dawn's early Spielberg light.

The Xenosaurus grabs its sack and some silverware spills

out. Then it runs off into the bushes and out of sight.

8 WITH THAT GARBAGE TRUCK 8

It reaches the crest of a hill where there's a "WELCOME

TO BEDROCK" billboard which bears greetings from the

Rotary Club, the Chamber of Commerce, and (of course)

The Loyal Order of Water Buffaloes. The garbage truck

guys drop their feet down through the floorboard and

trot over the rise, coast down to the street below.

The driver yanks a wooden brake and the truck stops, and

the rear guys hop off. One of them waves to -

9 A MILKMAN 9

who returns the wave, then takes a four-pack of stone

bottles out of his milk truck, heads towards a doorway.

As the milkman drops off the milk, he passes a big

TORTOISE with trash cans on its back. The Tortoise

nods familiarly to the milkman, then it waddles down the

curb, CAMERA FOLLOWING. The garbage men take the cans

off the Tortoise's back, dump them into the truck.

10 REAR OF TRUCK 10

--revealing that the back of the truck is actually a

giant-jawed CREATURE strapped onto the chassis. The

garbage men dump the cans into its maw... it happily

swallows the works, licks its lips, BELCHES.

11 BACK TO SCENE 11

The garbagemen slam the cans back on the Tortoise, who

winces as they drive off.

TORTOISE:

(under his breath)

You can forget about a tip for

Christmas...

It waddles back up the lawn... passing by a wooden "lawn

timer" box which now pops open.

Inside the box is a "ROOSTERSAURUS" which CROWS and flaps

its wings. The motion of the wings knocks loose two

round stones which roll down two long troughs a la Rube

Goldberg...

4.

12 FOLLOWING THE ROUND STONES 12

They reach the ends of their respective paths, dislodging

a stick... that releases a coiled rope which in turn

spins a turntable which holds a little wooly mammoth. As

it begins to spin around, it squirts water out of its

snout.

Elsewhere on the lawn, other spinning MAMMOTHS repeat

this performance. After a moment, they gradually slow

their revolutions. The one closest to the house

scrunches its trunk with a GROAN.

LITTLE MAMMOTH:

(sotto)

Oh, my aching sinuses...

13 INT. FLINTSTONES' BEDROOM -DAY 13

WIDEN FROM the windowsill, where a little sea shell

hearing aid trumpet AMPLIFIES another ROOSTERSAURUS

"COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO" into the ear of a "CLOCK RADIO

WOODPECKER." The Woodpecker yawns, gets out of bed,

puts a timecard in a little clock. Then it turns

and begins pecking on a BELL, which RINGS PIERCINGLY.

14 INT. BEDROOM -NEW ANGLE 14

Two shapes are visible under the bedclothes: One is a

great SNORING bulge, the other is a svelte and lithe

shape. As the BELL continues RINGING, the larger bulge

GRUNTS, MOANS, pulls a pillow over its head, and then

finally gropes under the bed for a slipper. The slipper

is thrown without aiming -

15 THE WOODPECKER 15

ducks just in time. It wipes its forehead nervously.

RADIO WOODPECKER

(sotto)

I hate this job... There's not

even a health plan...

He staggers back up to his perch, and then notices for

the first time that the dial on the side is pointed not

to "ALARM" but to "ALARM & RADIO." The WOODPECKER SIGHS,

looks over at the bed where SNORING is still emanating.

Then the bird swings a little telescope around to point

out the window.

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