The Game Plan Page #6

You are going to eat

over at the Jensens', across the hall.

It's just like a restaurant over there.

Only not so much.

We going to miss you

at dinner tonight.

It was a shock at first,

but nothing's changed.

Nothing's changed.

Is your coat Bedazzled?

Peyton.

Wait a minute.

I'm still Joe.

Still the king.

You drive station wagon.

What? A station wagon?

That's not my car.

Somebody's fired.

I'm Joe Kingman and somebody's fired.

- Mr. Kingman, wait! Mr. Kingman.

- What?

I'm sorry, but I guess Peyton's

allergic to our dog.

Oh, she's allergic to the dog.

She's allergic to the dog.

Oh, really?

Well you're not allergic to Spike.

Excuse me.

- Bed. Now.

- I'm not even tired.

- Well, I am. Go to bed.

- To think you walked out on my mom

just to hang around

with the sorry likes of that.

What did you just say?

- To think you walked out...

- I didn't walk out on your mom.

She walked out on me.

Oh, really?

Because she said

you were self-centered. And selfish.

And that everything

always had to be about you.

She said your head was so swollen,

she was surprised

they made a helmet big enough to fit.

- She said that?

- And more.

You know, it's all coming back to me.

Of course. Everything.

All the talking and the arguing

and the complaining.

And you know what?

You're just like her!

- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah!

You think you're right about everything!

- Just like her!

- What else?

You scrunch your nose

when you get angry just like her!

Keep it coming.

You're always working on me

with those big brown eyes...

Well, I actually like that, it's really cute.

But it doesn't matter,

because it's just like her!

Is that all you got?

And then you get inside

people's minds,

and you drive them crazy!

Just like her!

Well, at least I got a mind,

because if I didn't, I'd be just like you!

Well, I'm lucky, because as far as

I'm concerned, you are nothing like me!

- Good! Because I am sick of it here.

- What do you want from me?

Don't turn your back on me, little lady.

Tell me what you want!

My mom!

Hey, open the door.

Thanks a lot, Spike.

Traitor.

Any advice?

Are you lonesome tonight

Do you miss me tonight

Are you sorry we drifted apart

Does your memory stray

To a bright sunny day

When I kissed you

and called you sweetheart

I wonder why I am

Singing this for

When you will not even

Open the door

I don't want to see you.

Well, how about you open the door

with your eyes closed?

See, that wasn't so bad.

Is your heart filled with pain

Shall I come back again

Tell me dear

Are you lonesome tonight

Won't you open your eyes

Give your dad a surprise

Tell me Peyton

Are you lonesome tonight

There they are. Big and brown.

Do I really have my mommy's eyes?

Yeah. You bet.

You also have

her crazy long eyelashes, too.

And every time you bat those things,

there's a huge hurricane in Hawaii.

See, look at that.

Three houses just blew away on Oahu.

It's on the news.

My mom said she fell in love with you

because of your guitar playing.

That you sounded just like Elvis.

- Well, what do you think?

- I think she was tone-deaf

and you sound more like

a wounded moose than the King.

A wounded moose?

Mmm-hmm.

Like...

Like that?

There's that smile

I've been waiting for.

I would do anything to

keep that beautiful smile on your face.

Anything?

Quiet!

Quiet! I said quiet!

Let's go!

Everybody, I need a tight

formation, right now, in front.

Tight formation, everybody.

Calling an audible.

Fifty-nine razor. What would...

I am serious! Everybody huddle up...

Little girls don't speak "football," Joe.

Hey, I didn't say break.

You call your dad Joe?

Hmm.

Come here.

What am I, two feet tall? Peyton!

Watch out!

Watch my legs, I got million-dollar legs.

What's that number?

Get out of here! You're in my way!

My legs! I got to play on Sunday.

Hello? I need help. I need help!

Get off me! Everybody off...

Me first! Me first!

Excuse me.

- I'm world-famous. I'm a celebrity.

Maybe a smidgen of the cream.

Very good tea.

Would you like a little bit of tea?

- Thank you for saving me.

- You're welcome.

Totally out of my league.

Only mothers can do this stuff.

Not necessarily.

I mean, it's true

that mothers are definitely smarter

and kinder and funnier,

and for the most part

better at everything.

But can I tell you something?

I wouldn't underestimate

the power of the father.

- The power of the father.

- Sure.

Dads are great for picking you up

and dusting you off.

They give you the courage to do things

They give you the courage to do things

that you never thought you could.

My father took me

to my first ballet class.

Lucky for us he did.

What?

Nothing.

Do we have any product for this?

My doll has hair plugs for some reason.

Joe, they've got Camille

fingernail polish!

- No way.

- Way!

Nice shade. What is that?

Powder-puff pink?

I got a question. Do your toes match?

Hey. Hey, relax. Relax. Cut it out.

He can't help it.

Somebody stole his man card.

All right, all right, all

right, all right. Listen up.

Indianapolis claims that they're

going to send us on a long vacation.

- But who's about to go fishing?

- They are!

- Who's about to hit the links?

- They are!

- Who's going to win the championship?

- They are!

- We are?

- We are!

- Ready!

- Break!

Your turn, little one.

I can't do it. I'm not big enough.

My shoulders aren't strong enough.

Little one. You can do it.

Your strength is in here.

- Are you ready?

- Okay.

Let's do it.

- There you go. You're doing it.

- Yeah, it's moving.

Hey, Joe.

Attaway, P.

And one. Higher.

Point those toes, please.

Everybody together. Much better.

No, no, no, no, no, no...

Instinct.

And a three. And one...

And...

Hey. You've got my time, cutie-pie.

Yeah...

Boston Rebels. Catch the spirit.

Hey, Peyton. Come here.

You are so busted! Get over here!

- Hey...

- Get him!

Fire!

- Fire!

- Fire!

Good one.

Boston beats Indianapolis.

The Rebels will advance on

to next Sunday's conference finals...

Look at this. Look at this.

Artwork in the locker, huh?

I definitely say

she's breached the final frontier.

That's our game plan.

See, I especially like the Xs and Os

down there.

Oh, no, those are hugs and kisses.

Hugs and kisses. All right. All right.

Is Spike wearing a tutu?

No, no.

No, that's one of those...

That's one of those doggy supports.

Hey, P. P! Hey, P.

Give these to Monique, okay?

There she is.

You good?

Miss Monique. These are for you.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

- Are you ready for your big debut?

- Yeah.

- There you go, P.

- Thank you.

No, no, no. Joe. Joe, this is for you.

No. No, in case you forgot,

I'm a "freakishly" large man

and these are "freakishly" small tights.

Hurry up, offense. No huddle.

- Hey, guys.

Let's go.

Come on.

Come on. Come on.

- Please. Get dressed.

- No, listen to me. There's no...

How's it going?

Full house.

- Oh, no.

- Hey.

You know, Joe, I'm not feeling so good.

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