The Girl on the Train Page #5

in her eyes.

"I was punished when I told

my parents I had lost it."

I had found my savior,

the little girl whose kindness had

seen me through impossible times.

I left the cart right there

on the boardwalk,

and we walked for hours,

just talking...

Two people so different.

It was like we'd known

each other our whole lives,

which, of course, we had...

in our imaginations.

Seeing the worst

that people are capable of,

I had also seen in her

the best.

Now that I'd found her,

I promised her, promised myself,

I would never

lose her again.

And I've never

broken that promise.

I was wrong.

You don't want to choose between

a great love and a great story.

You think that's

what this is about?

I woke up one morning,

and I saw my mom standing

over the kitchen sink,

and suddenly

I knew what hell was.

You see the world,

but you're not in it.

People walk by your grave,

laughing, alive,

forgetting you.

But still you remain,

a bead of awareness

in a universe of uncaring.

But what if

there's a way out?

What if there's a bridge

to just one moment,

a story,

a sentence of our lives?

Do we become

a part of that story?

Does that become

our eternity?

I don't know why I didn't

tell her about the Herzmans.

I wonder

if it saved my life.

She took the cab

down with me.

The idea was I'd collect the footage

and we'd meet later in a diner.

You should have

fought for her.

You thought it was her

imperfections that you loved,

but it's really

just the story.

Makes you

into a nicer guy...

than the one who would've

left her for someone younger.

The great lost love

has its appeal,

even to a girl like me.

Stories don't age and die.

You can tell them

over and over.

Problem is,

they always end the same.

Seriously, man, what the

f*** were you thinking?

Fair question.

I mean,

what did you expect?

Damned if I know.

Damned if you don't.

Good one.

Yeah? Well,

take it to the grave.

What am I doing here?

Hey, man, you chugged

in here on your own steam.

It was

a rhetorical question.

I was asking myself.

I know what

"rhetorical" means.

No disrespect.

You know what I like

about vampire stories?

The good ones, anyway.

I couldn't begin to guess.

The victim has to invite

the vampire in.

I think I might

have misjudged you.

It's a common mistake.

Did you really think

you could have her?

Think she'd ever

show you her real self?

I guess I wasn't thinking.

That's where

you're wrong, partner.

You think too much.

Girl like Lexi,

she isn't about thought.

She tell you

what floats her boat?

Tell you to grab her hair,

push her face

into the pillows?

Tell you

she likes it rough?

I just had

a funny thought.

Wouldn't think you'd be

in a laughing mood.

About a patron saint

for lost causes.

Yeah, that's

one of her raps.

Unlike you, I don't imagine I'm

the first man she's told that to.

Probably not the first to wear

this around his neck either.

You always believe women when

they tell you you're their first?

Actually

I never believe that.

Well,

there's hope for you yet.

You know, of course,

that's a scorpion.

And your name's Spider.

Why do you...

Why have you got

a scorpion tattoo?

You do have a right

to remain silent.

Hey, I'm just saying.

Just saying.

In the end, does all that

smarts really pay off?

I mean, look where I am.

Look where you sit.

Doesn't that strike you

as funny?

Well, not funny.

I have this theory

about smarts...

That it gets in the way

of seeing things.

What? Did you think

she cared?

Just what I thought.

Only a smart guy could be

that f***ing stupid.

Here's another smart guy.

See how f***ing smart?

So, want to hear the plan?

Our girl asks you to get some dirt on old

Carl over there, which isn't hard to do.

He's much more interested

in pain than women.

What's the difference?

But you wind up

falling for her.

Decide you

have to have her.

She brings that out

in a man.

Let me guess.

I kill him.

See? Those smarts again.

Why do I kill him if she's

going to leave him anyway?

Hang on a minute.

Because he put a f***ing

nail through your hand.

Of course, I'd been

following Pruitt,

collecting all this footage,

so it had a certain logic.

Spider.

Scorpion.

Whatever your name is.

Arachnid!

You like pain

or something?

Look, I know smarts

has its limitations,

but dumb won't get you

very far either.

Seriously?

You really think

you're gonna end up...

on a paradise island

with her?

You really don't know

what's what, do you?

- She's not real.

- No?

She only shows you

what she needs to.

See, a man like you will

never get what she's about.

Upper West Side p*ssy.

Think I don't know you?

You walk the line, afraid

to give the littlest offense.

Tell them what they wanna hear,

f*** on their schedule,

tiptoeing nine paces

behind them.

You're right, hoss.

She'll never be real to you.

Just about done here.

And you thought the nail

was a good idea because?

He pisses me off.

So let me get this straight.

He kills Carl, and then he hammers

a nail into his own hand.

Carl fucks him up with the nail,

but he gets himself free.

He does Carl

with the knife,

and Carl has just enough left in him

to put a bullet between his eyes.

What did I say

about improvising?

Where is he?

I want to see him.

I've waited a long time.

Who the f*** are you?

Jesus.

Now he's dead.

He didn't know you.

You have the gun?

Cold as they come.

Why didn't he know you?

No. Let me.

You sure, babe?

He's my responsibility.

There's my girl.

Come on. You can do

better than that.

If it makes a difference,

I'm sorry.

Can't blame the scorpion

for stinging you.

What was that she said?

About living out an alternative future

in the last instant of your life.

...future in the last

instant of your life.

Is that what all this has been?

Is that what this is?

Are you always the last

to realize you're already dead?

...always the last to realize

you're already dead all along?

Maybe I should have been

paying more attention.

Well, that was the death that

flashed before my eyes anyway.

No. Let me.

There's my girl.

For the record,

I never liked it rough.

He pisses me off.

You weren't what I thought.

You're exactly

what I thought.

He won't be needing it.

So where will you go?

Someplace warm.

Who will you be

when you get there?

You invented me as much

as I invented myself, Danny.

The vampire can't enter

without an invitation.

I knew he didn't come up

with that line himself.

You want me to tell you

it was real for me?

That I loved you

if only for a moment?

That's why you're alive

and Spider's dead.

Okay.

I love you.

I always have.

Our souls were born together

at the beginning of time.

I can't tell you anything

you don't already know.

I believe you.

Will you remember me?

Safe bet.

The thing is,

even after everything,

I wanted to believe.

Duct-taped to a chair,

nail through my hand,

two dead guys on the floor,

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