The Girl with All the Gifts

1

(MELANIE TAKES DEEP BREATH)

MELANIE:
(WHISPERS) One, two, three, four,

five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten,

11, 12, 13, 14, 15,

16, 17, 18, 19, 20,

21, 22, 23, 24, 25,

26, 27, 28, 29, 30,

31, 32, 33, 34, 35,

36, 37, 38, 39, 40,

41, 42, 43...

(DOOR CLANKS OPEN)

(KLAXON HORN BLARES)

MAN:
Transit, let's go.

- Wakey-wakey, we're on the move!

- (BANGING ON DOORS)

Transit, let's go.

Rise and shine, you friggin' abortions.

Let's go.

- Transit!

- (BANGING ON DOORS)

Wakey-wakey.

Transit!

Come on, you friggin' abortions.

Good morning, Private Gallagher.

Good morning, Private Devani.

GALLAGHER:
Head secured.

DEVANI:
OK.

GALLAGHER:
Limbs secured.

"Cuffs and straps to be verified manually

and by line of sight."

Nice going, shithead.

Knows the drill better than you do.

(MAN SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

MAN:
Need some help here!

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

Good morning, Sergeant Parks.

- Gallagher, keep your distance.

- Sarge.

(DOOR CLANGS SHUT)

(DOOR OPENS)

- Good morning, Miss.

- ALL:
Good morning, Dr Selkirk.

DR SELKIRK:
Quiet, please.

Is that everyone?

Let's make a start.

The periodic table.

Close your eyes and visualise it.

And open. Actinides. Anne.

Ac... Actinium.

- Thorium.

- DR SELKIRK:
With numbers.

- Who knows the numbers?

- 89, 90.

DR SELKIRK:
Yes. Next, Peter.

PETER:
Uranium. 92.

Protactinium, then uranium. Kenny?

- Cobalt?

- DR SELKIRK:
Actinides.

We're on row seven.

(WHISPERS) Neptunium.

- Neptunium.

- DR SELKIRK:
Number?

Half a mark. Switch to period four. Anyone?

19, potassium.

20, calcium. 21, scandium...

Earth metals? Downwards from row two.

- Joe.

- (DOOR OPENS)

(DOOR CLANGS SHUT)

Morning, class.

ALL:
Good morning, Miss Justineau.

- I hope you're well, Miss Justineau.

- I am very well. Thank you, Melanie.

Erm, I'm done with the regression analysis.

Thanks for filling in.

Ah, the periodic table.

We haven't really covered this yet.

Just data pairs. Names and numbers.

Content is not really relevant, is it?

Enjoy!

OK, I've got chemical elements here.

- Oh. Lots and lots.

- Can we have a story?

Oh, yeah, that's a great idea.

Then someone goes and tells Dr Caldwell

and I'm in the sweat box for a week.

We won't tell. We promise.

We did stories last time.

Greek myths? Then it counts as history.

All right. We'll do one as a warm-up.

Now, where were we?

Prometheus and Epimetheus.

The war with the gods.

- Got it. Thank you, Melanie.

- You're very welcome, Miss Justineau.

"The gods do not forget.

"And by and by,

"Zeus wanted to punish

Epimetheus for his misdeeds,

"so he fashioned a woman of clay

and gave her the name Pandora.

"'She who brings gifts.'

"Pandora opened up the box

whereupon every plague and tribulation,

"every misfortune and evil thing

in the world came pouring out,

"and they have afflicted

mankind ever since,

"all because of Pandora's curiosity..."

Good night, Private Dillon.

Good night, Private Devani.

- Yeah. Sweet dreams, Cujo.

- Don't bloody talk to it.

(DOOR CLANGS SHUT)

"But then, Pandora peered into the box

and found one more thing in the bottom.

"It was hope.

"And she lifted it in her

hands and set it free.

"Hope...

"... is the good thing that makes you

be able to stand all the bad things."

But there isn't anything bad here.

Is there?

Good night, black-and-white kitten.

(LIGHT SWITCH CLUNKS)

No.

I guess we do OK.

MELANIE:
(WHISPERS)

Good night, Miss Justineau.

(LIGHT SWITCHES CLUNK)

(KLAXON HORN BLARES)

MELANIE:
(WHISPERING) 22, 23, 24, 25,

26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31,

32, 33, 34, 35,

36, 37, 38, 39, 40...

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

Hello, Melanie.

Hello, Dr Caldwell.

Did you solve the problem?

Nobody broke into the room.

Lupin stole the jewels right at the start

when he pretended to check

if they were still there.

Very good.

Here's another. There's a cat in a box.

It could be alive or it could be dead.

Fifty-fifty.

- How would you find out?

- You'd open the box and look inside.

Before that, when the box is closed,

is the cat alive or dead?

- Am I allowed to listen?

- No.

Or shake the box, or weigh it?

Or drill a hole in it?

Nothing like that. It's a logic problem.

(SIGHS) I'll have to think about it.

- What are you writing?

- Subject's responses.

"Exquisite mimicry of observed behaviours."

- Question mark.

- What does that mean?

That means the jury's still out.

Give me a number from one to 20.

- Thirteen.

- Thank you.

- PARKS:
Transit! Let's go!

- (BANGING ON DOOR)

Rise and shine! Come on, up you get!

Transit.

Come on, you friggin' abortions. Let's go!

Rise and shine...

MAN:
Look, we all agreed

to do our bit of time here.

WOMAN:
Three months, not six.

- Where's Kenny? Is Kenny coming to class?

- MAN:
I know, but when we rotate...

WOMAN:
Should have f***ing rotated

in week 40.

I should be in Beacon now.

MAN:
Carlisle said

the transport's coming next week.

WOMAN:
Yeah, he said that

last week, didn't he?

"'But no, 'the old man said.

'These are indeed your sailors,

"'turned into animals

by the witch's power.'

"'By the gods!' Odysseus cried.

'If that were my fate

"'and I brought down to a beast,

"'I would rather die by my own hand."'

Wow, tough audience.

- Will Kenny come to class today?

- Not today.

Tomorrow?

Here's an idea.

I'm gonna unlock your writing hands

and take your trays out

and you're gonna tell me a story.

- JOE:
But we don't know any stories.

- Only the ones you've told us.

That's all right. I want you to make it up.

What should it be about?

Anything you like, Melanie.

It's up to you.

DILLON:
Christ,

look at the creepy little f***ers.

How can she stand being that close to them?

She's well fit, though, in't she?

(CHUCKLES)

All right, time's up. Pencils down.

So, who would like

to read their story out loud?

Melanie. Start us off.

"Once upon a time, in ancient Greece,

there was a woman.

"She was very beautiful,

"the most beautiful and kind and clever

and amazing woman in all the world.

"One day, she was walking in a forest

"when suddenly,

she was attacked by a monster.

"It was a friggin' abortion

and it wanted to eat her.

"The woman was really brave.

"She fought and fought,

but the monster was big and fierce.

"She couldn't kill it.

She broke her sword and her spear.

"The monster was about to eat her.

"But then a girl came running up.

"She was like Achilles

because she couldn't be hurt,

"except in one place she kept secret.

"She fought the monster and killed it

"and cut off its head

and went galumphing back.

"And the woman...

"The woman said,

"'You are my special girl.

You will always be with me

"'and I'll never, never let you go.'

"And they lived...

They lived happily together ever after."

I'm sorry.

(SNIFFLES)

Can I try again?

Can I try again, please?

- PARKS:
No! No f***ing way! No.

- (GASPS)

- I didn't... Oh, Jesus.

- You just touched her.

My f***ing Christ,

you just touched her face.

I touched her head, the top of her head.

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