The Girlfriend Experience Page #7

or girl-next-door modes.

Alas, Chelsea seems intent

on marketing herself

as a sophisticated

escort.

With her flat affect,

lack of culture

and utter refusal to engage,

Chelsea couldn't even dazzle

the likes of

Forrest-f***ing-Gump.

And that's just where

the problems begin.

Just as her perky little tits seemed

to literally shrink at my touch,

so too did the connoisseur's

cock fail to launch

at the clammy touch

of her hand

and the lukewarm and loose

embrace of her mouth.

To quote the great sage

Jamie Gillis in 'Misty Beethoven,'

'this number is

the Nadir of Passion.'

A splendid time is absolutely

not guaranteed for all."

# when they leave #

# oh, yeah #

# everyone's

a critic... #

# whoo-oo-oo... #

# ooh-oo-ooh... #

# oh, yeah #

# oh, yeah #

# you ask me #

# to pray

with your beads-- #

- Hi.

- Hi.

Should I come out

or you want to come in?

How are you?

Good.

Can I get you

anything?

I'm fine.

So how's your day

treating you?

It's been all right.

Are you sure?

No.

Want to talk about it?

I really shouldn't.

But it's just been

really bothering me.

Something happen?

There's this guy

who runs a message board

and he's really nobody.

And...

he wanted to meet me

and have sex for the exchange

that in return he'll write

a good review about me,

tell people that I gave him

the time of his life,

which I already know

I do, but--

I shouldn't talk about this.

I'm sorry.

You can if you want.

He took a Q-tip

and he asked me

to put it on my vagina.

This guy probably didn't

shower for three days.

I'm sorry,

I'm really hot.

This guy was

just disgusting

in every sense

of the word.

I'm sorry,

I feel really stupid.

I shouldn't be

talking about this.

It's okay.

Look, you seem like

you need some air.

Do you want

to go downstairs?

You want to take a walk, get

a cup of coffee or something?

Yeah.

I'd like that.

Could you put us somewhere a little

further away from everybody else?

I have something

right over here.

That's better.

Thank you so much.

When somebody-- we agreed

to do this, right?

We agreed to meet here and

have this kind of situation,

which is a transactional

situation like the one

you deal with all the time

in your business, right?

Now we're up to this part

where I'm asking you something

that would actually be

interesting to me,

and I feel you're

holding out on me.

I mean, the thing is that

the inner you is really--

I mean, there's--

in this business it's all

about appearance, right?

If you weren't beautiful, nobody'd

be paying to bang you, right?

To put it grossly,

right?

So the thing is that

if you weren't beautiful,

you wouldn't be

in this business.

Is that right?

Do we agree on that?

So suppose

I like your looks,

but I'm really much more

interested in the real you

because I get a sense from

looking at your picture--

I'm not talking about myself,

but say somebody else--

I got a feeling

looking at your picture

and also looking

into your eyes right now

and the way you're doing

that with your hair

and the way you're wearing

your little outfit there

and all that kind of stuff--

and I like your earrings--

and here's somebody I'd like

to get to know a little better.

So is that iron door

always gonna be closed?

For most people, yes.

Most?

It's possible that

there might be a crack

in that little door

you could walk through?

This kind of thing that you

could possibly get through?

I assume the armor in your

situation must be very thick,

just because

it has to be, right?

So what kind of guy

would it have to be?

- Hi, Naim.

- Hey, Chelsea.

- How are you?

- I'm well. How are you?

Good, thank you.

- You look lovely.

- Thanks.

But it's very important that you

vote for McCain-- very important.

I know. We've had

this discussion.

The state of Israel

must continue.

He's the man.

Everybody's buying gold

'cause they think

it's a good hedge

against the stock market.

A friend of mine

told me that today,

actually said I should

invest my money in gold.

People think that

you should buy diamonds,

but diamonds don't really

have a resale value.

Unfortunately,

it's a myth.

Gold is

the way to go.

Here.

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