The Good Night Page #4

Jesus, nobody jerks off

at 7:
00 in the morning

unless they're really unhappy!

And it's sure as sh*t not me

you're thinking about in there!

I don't know how to respond to this, okay?

Don't lump me in with Paul

because he's f***ed up.

It just seems like

we're heading in that direction

and if we're going to end up like that,

it's better to talk about it now.

- We could have a normal conversation.

- Conversation about what?

About how I've watched more TV

in the last three years

than I have in my whole life because of you.

We don't do anything and

you're always the depressive, you know?

Does it ever occur to you that maybe

I need a little cheering up, you know?

That I want to feel special?

I don't think you do need cheering up.

I think you need tampons.

What a response. F*** you.

- I'm so tired of this...

- Dora!

- I can't sit around here anymore.

- Dora! Come on, I'm sorry.

- Go! Be messy, and go camping...

- What am I apologizing for?

...and live life and drive race cars!

- Jesus Christ, I'll just put you in a cab.

Are you okay? You look tense.

Do I? Sh*t. I feel like such a liar.

- What do you have to lie about?

- You. This.

Gary, you're a good person.

You haven't done anything wrong.

Then why am I so anxious all the time?

Why do I feel like everything I do is bad?

It's nice to feel the breeze on my face.

I think our relationship was

less complicated than his one with Dora.

But I think he was challenged

by complicated people.

He was challenged by people

who scared him.

Dora scared him.

- Dora?

- Hi.

Hey. What are you doing?

Ellen had to cancel her trip to Venice.

I had to decide at the last second,

but I'm going to go in her place.

It's a big deal for me

representing the gallery over there.

Wait, are you kidding?

This is great news,

but you didn't want to consult me?

Why should I, Gary?

You know, I mean, I think it's probably

the best thing that we have some time apart.

- I'm not making you happy...

- Best thing?

...you're not making me happy, so...

- Hang on, I'm not making you happy?

Oh, come on.

Let's just cut the bullshit, okay?

- This is ridiculous.

- The whole thing has just gotten totally...

It's just fear, you know?

I'm just afraid of being alone.

I don't want to get into the whole thing.

I'm not saying anything official.

I just want to go and do this.

- That's fine. But don't go like this.

- Come on.

You and your idiot friend can do

whatever you want while I'm gone.

I really don't care.

Paul has moved out of Terry's.

I'm thinking I might stay there

for a few days when I get back.

That's fine.

You do whatever you have to do, all right?

But don't blame me for everything.

I'm not blaming you, Gary!

That's the whole point.

It's just not fun anymore.

I feel lousy about myself all the time.

And that's how I feel.

I can't do this today.

It makes my joints ache.

Do you have your passport?

Yeah.

Okay.

Of course that's all you have to say.

You're such a dead person.

You're just so absent. You're so absent.

How did you get like this?

What's wrong with you?

- That is exactly the way you are with me.

- No, no, no, Gary.

You don't just reciprocate the complaint,

okay? You can't throw back the same insult.

- I never do that. That's what you always do.

- Oh, Jesus Christ! Goodbye!

Think of it this way,

you've got two weeks off, right?

Dora is out of town.

You know,

you can have wet dreams every night,

even work on this nocturnal thing

you're developing, you know,

and try and put it to use in the real world,

you know, in the real-life population.

I mean...

- What's your name, beautiful?

- Shawna.

- And do you have a boyfriend?

- Just you, sugar.

Correct answer. Straight A's for Shawna.

And what do you look for in a guy,

other than deep pockets and V. D?

I like funny guys.

Well, take my friend Gary here, okay?

Now, if he was a funny guy,

okay, and he's not by the way,

but let's pretend he is,

if he was a funny guy,

could he be your type?

Oh, sure.

You know, Shawna can be inspiring.

She wants to be a singer.

- A rapper.

- Even better!

Shawna, don't you want to rock Gary's mic?

Yeah.

Come on, Gary. Let me rock your mic.

Okay! That's fine!

Oh, make him stay, Shawna!

Please, you've been great.

I'm going to call you tomorrow.

Come back, Shane.

Anna?

Anna?

Hey, Gary.

Are you coming to Venice?

You're friends with Dora, right?

He knows her.

Hey, Gaz. She's going to rock the mic.

Oh, sh*t!

Gary didn't fear rejection.

What Gary feared

was being a mediocre talent,

which, to be brutally honest, he was.

Hey, Gary! What happened to you?

I thought you were going to be

a new addition.

Yeah, I'm sorry.

I've just been real busy, you know?

- Listen, do you have a minute?

- Well, I'm actually on my way to work.

- So, if you want to walk me, it's okay.

- Work? Hang on, isn't this your job?

You can't take sleeping pills, man.

That's Dream Science 101.

Well, it doesn't say anything in the book

about not doing it.

I mean, that's quite a major warning, right?

It should say so.

That's where all the incoherence

and the melting faces

and the dream monsters breed, man.

That's like inviting gremlins to a pool party.

Hey, see if you can help me with this, huh?

See, I don't know, Mel.

I've been reading this guy, Alan Weigert,

and he says that

you should take long baths...

Alan Weigert?

I told you not to read that crap!

Alan Weigert is a scummer and a sell-out.

I know him. You don't know him.

- What do you mean, you know him?

- He's a sick man and a goddamn capitalist.

- Wait, how do you...

- Do you know what a traitor is, man?

- Who, me or him?

- Balls. I gotta go to work.

Jesus Christ.

Mel...

Look, man, you gotta come to the group.

That's where we work these things out.

I'm not good with groups.

I just need some tips, like...

Does anybody else have these problems?

For most people, it's recreation.

You know, inner child sh*t, midlife crisis...

- But that's for me, too, though, right?

- It's not sounding like it.

Can't you just give me

something to help with the sleeping?

- Do you eat healthy?

- Healthy? What, like granola bars?

- Do you... Do you exercise? You like sports?

- Not really, no.

- You jog? You look like a jogger.

- Do I? No, I don't jog, Mel.

Well, start. Start running. Run till you drop.

You'll sleep like a baby.

God, I never thought of that.

Yeah, there's nothing better

than blowing it out,

because nothing will make you more tired.

Jeez, I can't believe I didn't think of that.

Mel, you're a genius.

If there's anything

I can ever do for you, then...

- You got 50 bucks?

- Sure, yeah.

Here, take my card. We'll treat it as a private.

- Okay.

- If you have any problems, you call me.

Thanks.

- Do you have an invitation, sir?

- No!

Gary, there's only so much

you can control, man.

You can't think that you can be in charge

of every element.

- Well, why not? Isn't that the whole point?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes