The Happy Film Page #5

you have a lot of caution.

- Yep.

- A lot of caution

about falling in love.

Maybe not about

everything in life,

But certainly

about falling in love.

- I guess,

you know, what I'm trying

To figure out here is

whether something about

You or your strengths,

The way you live your life,

Makes it simply difficult

for you to connect

Deeply with women.

- Yeah.

And that's why

we call it falling.

You don't have to choose fall.

You're just walking along

and you fall.

It's developing a long term

companionate love relationship,

That's what's harder.

- So, do you think that...

That's the question,

do you think that a long term

Companionate relationship

is possible without the

Passion that comes up front--

- Absolutely.

It's absolutely possible.

- It is possible?

- Yes.

- Yeah.

- Yes.

And that's the way traditional

marriages often were.

You simply

put the people together.

They might not love

Each other at first,

They don't know each other.

But they can develop very,

Very deep companionate

love relationships.

So, it's not that the

Passionate love is essential.

But it is one of

the greatest experiences

And for somebody who

craves peak experiences,

And strong emotions,

It is one that I would

not want you to miss.

- But from your point of view,

Miss private and I

could actually have

Developed

a beautiful relationship

Even though it didn't

feel very passionate

At the beginning.

- Absolutely, absolutely.

- Let's see that last one again.

- It just ends with the plane.

- I'm really trying to

work more on the film

And less on our regular

commercial projects.

- and then you'll

think of some ideas?

- Yes.

- great.

- Should we set a deadline?

- Otherwise, I'm just

gonna forget.

- Yeah.

- Jessica has great ideas,

Knows how to execute them,

And most important of all,

Has the wherewithal

To make them real.

- Well, we could film,

like, crops.

- yeah.

Even though she's super young,

She's crazily experienced.

I mean, she designed a website

showing other designers

How to design websites at 13.

I asked her

if she wants to become

A partner in the studio.

She did.

- Pouring like a yellow

paint or something,

And you saw the dripping.

Maybe we start with the plants.

- we renamed the

studio sagmeister and walsh,

And designed a card

announcing that.

We might need

some books for you.

- okay, and I think

we need about this many.

- okay.

- Okay, and here we are.

Okay, guys,

and start looking at me.

Look above me.

And you're just

looking at each other

As you're standing there.

Cool, okay, and now

Switch it around.

Great, again, both

looking at me.

Great.

Okay.

- Oh, my god, did you

tan for this, specially?

- Maybe.

I have a wound

that never will heal

and you are

the one

that constantly peels

the skin away

each and every day

why don't you please

why don't you please

why don't you please

and I have a way

of seeing these things

the skin on your bones

it comes deadly aloes

pull it away

pull it away

pull it away

- okay.

Okay.

- well, I felt

It was sort of strange that

We are making

a movie on happiness

And we having a director,

a co-director,

Who is, you know, seriously ill.

How do you feel?

- Just

Having been dealt a set of cards

That are really difficult,

You know, and no breaks.

- In some ways,

I'm actually surprised

That you still

wanna be a part of it.

For all the sort of daily crap

That documentary film

making brings with it.

You know, that you

don't just say, oh, no.

- You know, I mean,

I've got two kids.

I like to see them

watch me work.

It's really gratifying.

They get to see

what their dad does.

It floats your,

Well-being, I guess.

- There were times

When I'd almost wish it would

Be the other way around.

I mean, are you

angry at all, or?

- I've done the angry thing.

So heavily.

Chairs.

Books.

All kinds of things.

- what,

you've thrown chairs?

- Oh, sure.

I did that.

And all it did, really,

Was scare the kids.

Just scared my wife,

And made me feel bad.

- For hillman, the

Last year of his life

Was not about changing,

But about trying to keep

Everything exactly the same.

He wanted to eat ice cream

with our kids.

He wanted to work on

the happy film.

He wanted to

lie in bed and talk.

And he wanted to have

friends over for dinner.

Why should I accept death,

he'd ask me,

When my life is so beautiful?

- I'm not sad enough.

I'm sad

That I'm not sad enough.

I had a wonderful

conversation with christina.

She is so honest.

I really can learn from her.

I mean, she really goes deep.

You know, I asked her

how she's doing.

And she said, well,

Tess is just thriving.

Her youngest daughter

Is just thriving

Since hillman died.

What a difficult thing to admit.

And you notice that it's just,

There was so much sadness

in their house,

That it's so great to

Have that sadness lifted.

And that, if she's, later on,

I'm sure that she's

gonna realize

That she has no dad.

And there's going to be

difficulties with that.

But right now, she's thriving.

And when I said, well,

Correct me if I'm wrong but,

I would think that hillman

would be thrilled with that,

She said, oh, was

Not quite sure,

She was sort of quiet, and

I said, well, or not.

There's a darkness in all of us.

And an imperfection.

- it only hits me now.

I miss him.

I really do.

- Given the information

that we've gathered

In terms of your genetics,

I have to say that you're

Probably the healthiest person

That I've seen

all week in my practice.

So let's talk,

then, about anxiety.

- If I would go into a room

Where I don't know anybody,

I can be quite good about that

With a little bit of a going

Over a bump, introduce myself.

Or I can also be

anxious about that.

- And you don't suffer

from being lonely?

- no.

No, I really don't.

And spending time by yourself

Is okay?

- you're okay in your own company?

- Yes.

- So, your anxiety levels then

- I'm a little bit

afraid I'm painting this

Picture a little bit too rosy.

I'm afraid at the end I'm not

Gonna get anything because--

- well,

we'll talk about it though.

I mean, if you were coming to me

And reporting mild

anxiety that you wanted to

Do something about,

I wouldn't be opposed

to prescribing

Something like lexapro

In a low dose for you,

as a trial.

- Yeah.

- But it has side effects.

- The side effects are dry

mouth, headache, gi upset,

Anxiety, insomnia--

That's not a very good

side effect to have, no?

- These are all possible

side effects.

98% of the people

who take lexapro

Feel calmer and feel better.

The other thing that happens

when you first start a

Medication like this,

Your brain is going

through some changes.

Actually, your neural circuits

are sort of

Being rearranged.

If everybody knew

how complicated it was

And what these drugs do,

Probably, nobody

would take them.

- Yeah, this is the second day.

And I definitely had to

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