The Human Experience

My whole life,

I just try to fit in,

Try to fit in, you know,

And it's like...

It's like, you know,

you do that for a...

You do that because...

I did it because

I didn't get...

You know, I felt like

I didn't fit in at home,

In my own very...

my own house, you know?

And it's like,

I didn't have

that sense of security

And the love that I needed

from both parents.

And it's like,

that took an effect on me,

So it's like,

I'm trying to search myself

in some sense, some way.

Things I don't know

about myself,

I learn through life,

But I should've learned it

when I was younger.

But I couldn't

'cause of my situation

back home.

So now I feel like...

I don't know.

I feel like

this gives me an opportunity,

A chance to...

I don't know...

To really just...

To really get to know

who I am, I guess, you know?

Here in the parking lot.

And they had nothing

on whiffle ball.

So we could take them out too,

you know what I mean?

- Want a little bit?

- Yeah, a little bit.

Thanks.

Oh, on Thursday.

- He turns 21 on Saturday.

- Wow.

Yo, you know what that means,

don't you?

That's brotherly love.

So that's my brother, cliff.

He's a real character.

We're seven years apart.

And that's matthew,

who, not by blood,

I still consider my brother.

And sitting

next to me is mike.

We live together

here in brooklyn, new york,

At a place called

the st. Francis house.

People come here

for all different reasons:

Orphans, family problems,

economic problems, drugs.

What can I say?

Some call it

a halfway house or a group home.

We just call it home.

I live right now

at the st. Francis house,

Which has given me

a second chance at life.

I mean, we came from

some pretty real backgrounds.

I grew up poor.

I grew up with my family

not really being around.

We're a family.

For most of us

living here,

Life wasn't

all that easy growing up.

It tends to leave you

With a lot

of unanswered questions.

You ask yourself

all the time,

"where are we going,

and why?"

Two and two,

two and two.

Here we go.

It's something that I wasn't

used to, was a family life,

Giving me the life

that I never had

That I always wanted.

Yo, come on.

Let's not waste daylight.

- Let me pitch.

- Yeah, come on, no, no, no.

Seriously.

- Come on, please?

Let me pitch.

- Give me the ball.

Let me pitch. I want to pitch.

I'm a good pitcher.

Back off.

Get out of here.

All right, all right.

Oh!

So three months ago,

Cliff and I wanted to experience

something new and unusual.

We had a desire to see the world

through someone else's eyes.

The desire would eventually

take us around the world,

Meeting new people

with new ideas

And new philosophies

And pretty much every race,

religion, color, and creed.

For our first experience,

Cliff and I decided to join

the thousands of people

Who would spend their winter

sleeping out on the cold,

Brutal streets

of new york city.

We would live homeless

in new york

Without money or food

and try to experience life

And attempt to find hope

amidst the city's most hopeless.

As it would happen,

Our adventure would begin

right in our own backyard,

The concrete jungle.

We have an opportunity

to put ourselves

In a homeless man's shoes.

And the only way to do that

is to actually do it.

We've got a long night

ahead of us,

And I think

it's going to be a cold one.

# I said darkness

has covered my light #

# and has changed

my day into night, yeah #

My ass is freezing, dude.

I'm freaking shaking here,

just sitting.

And I'm not even here,

like, half an hour yet.

For me,

everything's an adventure.

You know, if a car breaks down

on the highway

And we got to, you know,

change a tire or fix it,

That's an adventure for me,

you know?

I'm shaking right now,

and I'm awake.

I can only imagine

when my body slows down

When I'm trying to sleep.

I don't mind

being a little cold.

You know,

it's just a little sacrifice.

I got nowhere

to go right now.

I got nobody to see.

A little sacrifice just to get

some wisdom and knowledge

And to, you know,

just be thankful

For everything I've got.

I'm bored, I'm uncomfortable,

and I'm cold.

I will definitely help

my brother out if he needs help.

And we're going through

this together, you know?

I'm ready to call it quits.

Well, as long as we're

going through it together,

We'll...

You know,

it'll be easy.

Overall, I know it's gonna be

quite an experiment

And quite an experience.

What keeps them going?

Why is it

that they wake up every day?

What's their reason

for living?

To feel or experience

for a couple of nights

What it's like

to be homeless,

You have to prepare for it.

You have to have your box.

You have to have your blanket.

You have to behave

just like a homeless person.

The best place to sleep in the city

Is by a church.

It's safer there.

If I go by that man's house

and sleep,

He's with society,

So he's going

to call the cops.

Oh, you want to understand

what homelessness means?

You have to live it.

You know what I mean?

You see homeless people

on the street.

You see homeless people

everywhere, you know?

You have to live it.

You have to feel it.

You could be living in an

apartment now and enjoying life,

And the next day,

you're out in the street.

How are you

going to handle that?

It's a very rough transition.

It's not the royal palace,

but it'll have to do.

Hope it's a warm night.

This is definitely

a different experience.

We're in a community

with all these guys,

With all these

homeless men

Sleeping in cardboard boxes.

And, you know,

it's like,

You don't know

where they're coming from,

So you have

to be careful.

You don't know

who you're sleeping next to.

I know the streets

of new york city,

But to actually sleep

Out in the streets

of new york city

Is a whole different experience.

You learn a lot

when you travel.

You learn how people live.

Everyone survives differently.

I grew up

in a very abusive house.

And my dad

was an alcoholic...

A drug addict.

He was very abusive to me

and to my two older brothers

And my mom as well.

I was kind of a...

I was a surprise baby.

I was a surprise.

I wasn't intended.

You know, my mom

didn't plan on me.

I wasn't a planned baby.

I did have my fun times

as a kid, you know?

I wasn't close to my father,

But I do look back,

and I say to myself,

You know, "he did...

there was good times."

July 4th was, like,

my dad's day.

That was his day.

He would get, like,

the best fireworks,

And the whole block

would be involved.

And we'd light fireworks,

And it would go on

for hours.

It'd be from...

as soon as that sun went down,

Just start lighting fireworks,

you know?

Everyone loved

my dad for that.

There'd be a firecracker belt,

And it'd just stretch out

from one end of the street

All the way down

to the other.

And it was just great,

you know?

That was...

I look at those.

You know,

I look at those memories.

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