The In-Laws

You will see that her fingerprint

matches exactly.

That's very nice. Very, very nice.

So...

...when will your buyer have the money?

He should have the money

within a week.

You will do it in four days.

Four days. That's Sunday.

I've got something going on on Sunday.

Sunday will be fine. I'll work out

my schedule. I'll juggle it, not to worry.

One more thing.

If I come to America with Olga...

...you think you can get me tickets

to Cline Dion?

I will not only get you tickets,

I will get you backstage.

And if we're really lucky,

you'll have coffee with her, okay?

Get down!

There's your guys.

See you in four days?

- How'd it go?

- Well, I had a minor snag.

Not bad.

I would've liked to gotten in

a double twist before the blowup.

Heads up.

- Thanks, doll-face.

- Anytime.

You got any gum?

Put your thumb in there.

So Cherkasov wants

to do the deal on Sunday.

The wedding's on Sunday.

I knew that.

I wouldn't forget my only son's wedding.

We'll just have to juggle.

Don't think of it as a problem,

think of it as an opportunity for a solution.

- So have you met the bride's family yet?

- No, I'm a little worried about that.

- About what?

- Well, the father. He's a doctor.

You know how they are. They think

they're better than all the rest of us.

He's probably a brain surgeon

or something.

I need you to listen

to me carefully now...

...because it's getting very, very serious.

All right.

Now, the fungus on your toes

is coming back.

Are you putting the powder in your shoes?

Are you using the cream at night?

Sometimes.

If a piano was falling on your head,

you move out of the way "sometimes"?

It's a fungus. I wasn't worried.

Start worrying! It doesn't hurt to worry.

Dr. Peyser, your daughter's here.

I'll be right back.

- Hey, Daddy.

- Hi, sweetie.

What'd you want?

The Mortons are bringing

their children now.

- You know their 8-year-old, Irwin?

- Yeah.

He has a shoe fetish.

I had them at the table

with Uncle Bernie and Aunt Thelma...

...but I think this is a problem.

- Thelma was beaten up in a shoe store.

- My God.

I don't wanna put them together. I'll move

Bernie and Thelma to the 12-step table.

Fine. Whatever you want, Dad.

I just don't want you to be too anxious

about the seating chart.

No, I'm fine. I just want

the best wedding in the world, that's all.

Marc's only requirement is that

his parents are at separate tables...

...facing away from each other,

and out of earshot.

- I know.

- And his dad's coming over at 7 tonight.

- I'll believe that when I see it.

- Marc swears he'll be there this time.

- Well, I'm making a veal.

- Nice, Dad.

Okay, I'll sign off on this and fax it

to the new caterer and we're done.

- The new caterer?

- Yeah, you know that.

Daddy, you fired another caterer?

They weren't caterers.

That was a man and his wife and lettuce.

Okay. Fine. I didn't even want a caterer,

I just wanted six people and a beach, but...

Melissa, this is what you want.

This is the wedding you'll remember.

You're right.

Thank you, Dad.

Bye.

Get the beach out of your head,

it's overrated.

You'll be standing there in front

of an E. Coli sign.

Sh*t. We got a fire in number one again.

Got any halon left?

Barely.

We're losing altitude.

We're coming up on Nova Scotia.

- How about Thibodoux?

- You're meeting his person tonight.

I can't tonight.

I've got the in-laws for dinner.

I've blown them off three times.

I can meet with Thibodoux's person.

You do the parent thing.

No. You're not ready yet.

- Always the bridesmaid, never the bride.

- Who got you into this business?

I taught you everything you know.

When you're ready, you can take the lead.

I'll figure it out tonight.

I'll just improvise.

Okay, here we go.

Mayday, mayday! Lear Niner-Whiskey-Mike

approaching cape Breton.

And this is when Melissa

went bungee jumping.

She's so crazy.

- Was that my dad?

- Nope.

Your father seems

to be working all the time.

I had no idea selling Xerox machines

was so demanding.

It's a wild ride.

Yeah, but he loves it.

I have an announcement to make!

The glaze on the veal is now a laminate.

It's like a plastic jacket.

He doesn't usually cook.

He can't handle the pressure.

I'd just like to know

what day we're gonna eat.

He's here.

Here we go.

I am sorry. I am so sorry.

My apologies. Engine trouble.

Mea culpa. Mea culpa to the tenth power...

Are you Katherine?

Oh, my God! Marc said you were gorgeous,

but he didn't do you justice.

- Come here. Come here.

- Well, thank you.

Hello, beautiful. How are you?

Good to see you.

Hi, buddy. Sorry, business.

- Is she here?

- No. She'll be at the rehearsal dinner.

Okay, good.

Boy, do you have a beautiful house here.

What is that, veal jerky?

We passed jerky about an hour ago.

This has gotta be the doctor.

- Come here.

- That's all right.

- Come here. Come on.

- No, I don't like this.

Thank you, Jer. I don't need your watch.

I've already got my own right here.

What are you talking about?

How did you do that?

- I love magic tricks!

- That's wonderful.

Breaks the ice a little bit, huh?

Gets that party going!

All right. That's very entertaining.

Dad, does he get the watch back?

Of course! I just feel terrible about the meal,

so dinner is on me!

He who is tardy pays for the party, okay?

Jer, Katherine, what do you feel like?

Ethnic food?

How ethnic?

This place is gonna

knock your socks off.

I'll meet you inside, okay?

Dad, can I have a second with you?

- At least the dog looks fresh.

- Just relax, honey.

The whole schmoozy salesman thing...

- Yeah, how's that playing?

- Take it down a notch.

Yeah, okay, I got you. Thanks.

Good evening and welcome to Quan Lee.

Table for five?

- Are you full tonight?

- Expecting to be any moment, sir.

This is Quan Lee.

He's the owner of the place here.

Quan Lee and I did some copy-related work

in Vietnam together.

Katherine, why don't you sit over here.

He had a copier with a paper slot

that was choked with paper.

So I destroyed the copier.

Dad's always got great stories.

Tastes like beer,

but it's got an incredible buzz.

This guy gets around.

He's chased across Prague in the morning,

has dinner with U.S. Contacts that night.

- So have you ever been to Vietnam?

- No, but we hear it's lovely.

Jerry prefers to stay in one place.

He had an anxiety attack

watching an airline commercial once.

Honey, I did not have an anxiety attack.

If I remember correctly, that airline is now

out of business, so thank you very much.

Jer, I'm with you. I like to be in control.

I like to be right there in the driver's seat.

In which case,

pray you're not a passenger.

Marc doesn't like the way I drive.

Am I wrong? I look at traffic signals

sort of as a suggestion.

In that case, you would be wrong.

He would.

- Who's that?

- Which one?

- The guy on the left.

- Just a sec.

You got him?

I've got no ID.

He could be deep cover.

Menus.

Would you like me to bring you

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