The Judge Page #2

- Sorry for your loss.

- ...Good friends always.

Good man.

Thanks for coming.

I appreciate it.

Whole force is out there.

- Henry...Yeah.

- Judge...

- oh, Johnny boy...

- I'm so sorry.

- Jessica said...

- Thank you, rose.

I'm going to shower

and hit the rack.

Glenn, make sure you hold

your boys together tomorrow.

We don't want a lot of...

Caterwauling.

- Will do, judge.

- Yeah.

I guess it has been

a while, Hank,

but backing a car into the driveway

would make getting out easier...

It's a concept not

dulled by time.

- Thank you.

- Right?

Got it.

Be my guest, please.

- How are you doing?

- I need to water the plants.

You Gonna to be okay at

the funeral tomorrow?

- Yeah.

- If the camera make an appearance,

we both know where...

It's heading, right?

Up my Arse.

Good man.

Tough day.

At the wake... he shakes my hand

while he was hugging someone else.

This family is a f***ing

Picasso painting.

you're Gonna inherit all

dad's important stuff...

It's crazy, I mean...

Magic 8 ball.

That's certain.

- Hey Hank, you want some breakfast?

- You'll have to hustle if you do.

Hey, Hank. Going breakfast

at the diner, care to join?

Ok, when? Right now. Er, oh yeah,

can I throw in some pants?

Sure, you're family member, we're

prepared to offer you some consideration.

Any of that reason

sounds reasonable.

I come here every Saturday for the last 35

years... oh I forgot, today is about you.

Coffee?

- Let's go.

- We'll see you there, Hank.

I'll be right along.

Still letting him wind you up?

Sam...

Henry.

I'm surprised that

you still work here.

In, in a good way, in a way, you

know, when people are surprised,

you meet somebody you know...

Discovered they've the same job...

- ...20 years...Stop it.

- Yeah, he keeps his hair...

Like sawing sawdust, all

that worry for nothing.

Any other fears come true?

Yes...Just now. Old

girlfriends, seeing Them...

Stop staring, I

know I look good.

I'm sorry about your mom.

She and I stayed close, er,

I Just saw her Tuesday.

...Mysterious ways...

- I'm assuming you still

know where the cemetery

is. - Yeah, you're

invited, of course you're.

- oh, finish it, you gotta go.

- Surprise that I'm.

See you there.

You'll always be my sweetheart.

You always will be... I

want you to know that.

I'll be back tomorrow.

- Hank's feet is on the couch.

- Indeed.

Hey, Glen, my nephew

still playing ball?

think either of Them

can be as good as you?

Yes...

Yes, Joe...Is hitting

clean up...In varsity.

Eric won't know a baseball

if you threw at him,

even hit him in the head.

Anyway, for what it's

worth, none of my business.

Keep an eye on the judge, I

think he's...He's drinking.

Are you crazy? Dad has

been sober for 28 years.

At the courthouse,

he forgot Gus' name.

Gus? Gus the Bailor?

oh, come on!

Just saying.

That's bullshit! What time

is your flight tomorrow?

8:
15, I can't wait,

first flight out.

Make yourself at

home there, Henry.

- I'm going for groceries.

- Should Glen drive you?

I don't know, Dale. Does being a widower

make me a lousy goddamn driver, huh?

Hank, if I don't see you

before, before you leave,

thanks for coming. I'm sure your

mother would have appreciated it.

Honey, we're going to

firefly and drink.

- No.

- Come on!

- I'm Gonna go to bed.

- No, drink, Dale, you coming?

Dale, you coming?

Hank, he threw things at

us to get our attention,

not to draw blood,

you know that.

No. His use of canine command

is to get our attention.

He hurls periodicals for sport.

Please, with all the troubles you made,

you're lucky that's all you got.

- Hey, thanks for showing up, Carla.

- Yeah, I know I'm late, so, sue me!

It was tough but hell,

it isn't that bad.

- Remember the fishing days?

- Lake house.

Yeah, he used to tell

us all to be quiet,

- 'you're scaring the fish away.'

- 'you're scaring the fish away.'

he still goes there every Wednesday

to play chess with Dr. Morres.

- He loves that place.

- Hey, don't I know you?

don't you run the tire and

rim shop over on state?

That's right.

Hey, Palmer?

I know you too.

You little dimwit shuttle bug retard,

always shooting movie camera.

- He's...

- Judge Palmer's your old man?

He thinks he runs

this town, don't he?

- Your dad is a piece of sh*t!

- Wait, wait, wait, no...

- I told you already!

- Who's on parole?

You guys have a low

opinion on judge Palmer?

When your field official is

filling out his incident

report, I'm Gonna be very

helpful, as helpful as possible.

So let me guess, who's going to fill in

the DWI?

Ugh, you flinched! Possession of

controlled substances, domestic violence,

that's you, you alright, honey?

What are the random

myriad of f***ing misdemeanors

is Gonna come to light

while you're drying

up at the slammer?

Failure to appear bench warrants?

Come on!

And because I'm the only one that isn't

driving with a suspended license,

I'll be driving your gals home

girls, so...Who lives closer?

Er, bad skin muffin top

or red bull semen breath?

A**hole!

Throw that first punch!

You like county food?

Meet my closed fist, Counsel,

in my own personal space.

Maybe, I'm Just Gonna

ask you blow my dice.

That's a metaphor, I'd heard

it, it's good, you're funny.

Let's get the hell outta here.

Get some counselling.

Hey shorty! Come here!

Uh, why don't you read my b's,

maybe I'll buy you a drink.

Punctuality issues,

equals confidence in

bullying, strong teeth,

ancestral gene pools

and...I'm guessing the wetter

you get, the better you look.

What're you having?

Last call, boys.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, you're done.

Are you watching for me?

What do you think I'm doing?

I'm your eyes.

- Straight...

- You smell like her.

She smells nice, what's that?

It's? Are you

paying attention?

Straighten it out, back...

Back, back. Easy, nice, nice,

sh*t.

- You did that on purpose.

- No, don't think I did.

No, you did it on purpose.

You Bang it out yourself.

Dale, let's go.

Let's go.

What the hell did he hit?

I was thinking...Six pack?

God damn it!

Which one of you peckerwoods

banged up my car?

Answer me, who did this?

- Who do you think?

- Who?

Who drove last?

We saw you leave for

grocery store, come on.

- Glenn...Where're your boys?

- oh, dad...They won't drive your car.

don't pretend this is complicated,

there's no reasonable doubt here.

He's human, his wife died,

he fell off the wagon,

banged up the cadi'.

- Deal. Shits happen.

- Like your marriage.

- Like your marriage.

- What do you know about my marriage?

- I know a lot about your marriage.

- don't f***ing think about my marriage.

She was my wife long before

she was your mother.

We kept no secret.

You tell your brothers you're Gonna

divorce, go ahead, tell Them!

Lisa, played hide the

pickle with someone else.

- I won't be back.

- Happy trail.

- I'll never f***ing come bake here again.

- Good!

Make it quick.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote