The Last of the High Kings Page #6

I already did.

This is a great honor, sir,

a great honor.

Oh, I-I'm sorry.

Jim, this is Nelson Fitzgerald,

an old friend of the family.

Ah, how are you?

It's a great honor.

[Chuckling]

Victory is ours!

Hear, hear!

Frankie, Ray,

drinks for everyone.

Come on. Drinks.

Jim, come

and meet everyone.

Thanks.

It's really Jim.

[Cheering]

[Indistinct talking]

Here we are.

Ah.

For you.

Irish mist...

'bout an inch.

Malibu... just a tiny bit

at bottom.

Uh-oh.

We've struck gold.

There's a couple of

full ones here.

Ugh!

Hooo!

Poteen.

[American cowboy accent]

Firewater. Moonshine. Hooch.

That stuff can drive a man

crazy as a cactus.

Exactly.

Ah.

I don't think it's quite

what Ma had in mind.

Da said it's for

rubbing on the greyhound.

Ray, my brother,

we don't have a greyhound.

[Cap pops]

It's time

for victory punch.

Don't forget the wine.

- That's why we're here.

- Please.

No, please, I can't.

Please, don't.

It's been too long, Jim.

Father, I...

It's what we came

tonight for.

- Go on.

- Look, we're not leaving

till you sing.

- Father, I can't.

- Go on.

"A Nation Once Again."

This one's for Jim.

- [Introduction to

"A Nation Once Again" plays]

- [Crowd cheers]

# When boyhood fire

was in my blood #

# I read of ancient freemen #

# For Greece and Rome

who bravely stood #

# 300 men and 3 men #

- # And then I prayed

I yet might see #

- [Chuckling]

# Our fetters rent in twain #

# And Ireland, long a province,

be a nation once again! #

- Victory punch.

Victory punch.

- # A nation once again #

- Excuse me, Deputy,

a drink for you?

- # A nation once again #

Would you like

some victory punch?

- # And Ireland,

long a province #

- To victory.

- # Be a nation once again #

- You'll never catch us

in coalition, huh?

- # And from that time,

through wildest woe #

- This is just the best,

you know?

# That hope has shone

a far light #

# Nor could love's brightest

summer glow outshine... #

- [Laughs]

- Hold on, hold on.

[People singing drunkenly]

When Elvis comes to Ireland,

it'll just make the place.

We'll never look back.

It's gonna be amazing.

Our fellas

went falling like flies.

Have you ever smelt death

in the afternoon?

[Drunken singing continues]

Colonel Tom Parker.

That's where

your problem's going to be.

I'm sure he doesn't

give a damn about Elvis.

You're absolutely right.

Do you know what he needs?

A real manager.

Will you have another?

I know. There have been various

allegations made about meself.

And I know the names

of all the allegators.

[Drunken singing continues]

We had only three rounds

and a wee petrol bomb

between us.

I'm telling you...

until you've had a gun

in your hand,

you're still a virgin.

[Chuckles]

You wouldn't be so smart, sonny,

if your mother wasn't here.

If my mother wasn't here,

you wouldn't be

on top of our fridge.

[Drunken singing continues]

# Da-da da-da-da

da-da-da da-da-da #

[Laughs]

# A nation once again #

# When my dear country

shall be made #

# A nation once again #

# A nation once again #

# A nation once again #

# A nation once again #

[High-pitched]

# Uh uh uh uh #

# A nation once again #

- Oh, my goodness.

- [Cheering]

- Oh, it's awful.

- Oh, my goodness.

What a shame

Monica can't be here.

Ah, well, she's not

a great one for parties.

There's only one thing

I want to know about you, sir.

Did you ever have a gun

in your hand?

No.

Why don't you

come with me, pal?

Excuse me, have you

ever had a gun in your hand?

You know, you could be

of great importance

to the government.

[Indistinct conversations]

You're a very beautiful woman,

Cathleen, do you know that?

Oh, now, Jim,

you've a silver tongue.

Oh, if you were my wife,

I wouldn't leave you

abandoned and lonely...

a woman with

your fiery passions.

Did I ever tell you

how much I loved you

on the stage?

You signed my program once.

Oh, Jim.

Yeah.

[Both moaning]

[People singing drunkenly]

Come with me.

I need you tonight,

of all nights.

God, you're magnificent!

Jim, you have

a lovely wife.

We have

an open marriage!

Lord God, there must be

somewhere cozier

where we could...

Jim, I don't think

you're doing yourself justice.

Well, you should

try it sometime.

Take a walk

on the wild side.

[Chuckles]

I know you want me.

Oh, Jim.

[Drunken singing continues]

Do you... do you mind...

What?

I'm feeling...

Ji...

Jim!

[Light applause]

# Oh, Danny boy #

# The pipes,

the pipes are calling #

# From Glen to Glen #

Poteen? Why?

How could you?!

Poisoning my guests!

Why, are you mad?!

I'm sorry.

Sorry?

This was the happiest night

of my life.

My night,

and you've ruined it.

I'll never be able to speak to

these people again.

It was my idea.

I could have guessed your hand

was at the back of this.

How could sons do this

to a mother?

How could you,

Frankie Griffin?!

Poor Jim.

"Poor Jim."

At least it stopped him from

getting his paws all over you.

How dare you?

[People laughing in distance]

What did you do that for?

[Indistinct conversations,

drunken singing]

Ma?

Yes, love?

I'm very concerned.

What are you

concerned about?

What's going to happen

to Noelie

when I'm not around

to look a-after him?

Oh.

Oh, sweetheart.

Don't worry.

Two days left.

What is it about time?

Whenever you want it to move

quick, it goes slow,

whenever you want it to go

slow, it gallops.

I'm gonna

get this party together.

At least I'll go out

with a bang.

[Waves crashing,

sea gulls crying]

It's just gonna be great.

Yeah,

but what if it rains?

Screw the rain.

We'll get wet.

Okay, you guys do the music

and the lights,

then all we gotta do is round up

all the women we've ever met.

- [Chuckles]

- [Chuckling] Yeah.

Where have you been?

An interview.

For what?

A job.

- Did you get it?

- I don't know.

We thought you were going

to be a concert promoter.

Get lost.

Well, now he's here.

Hey, what are you gonna do

about the party?

I don't know

about this party.

I mean, no one is going to come

to a party on a beach.

Where do you think this is,

California?

Could be.

Well, it's not.

Hey, the thing is, I really

want to organize this.

So, are you gonna

help me, or not?

Frankie, you couldn't organize

a piss-up in a brewery.

Oh, yeah?

That's pretty good

coming from you.

How's the Elvis gig

coming along?

Bringing Elvis to Ireland

is a better idea

than a stupid beach party.

Hey, guys, relax.

The only reason why

you want to have this party

is because you

have not got the bottle

to ask out Jayne Wayne

or Romy Thomas.

You can't even

make up your mind

which one you fancy!

- Bullshit.

- No, it's not bullshit!

We're all supposed to

hang around on a freezing beach

in case

one of them shows up.

Do you want one of us

to help you stick it in?

At least I like girls.

At least I don't

fancy your mother.

[Scoffs]

Are you saying

I fancy your mother?

Come here.

Your ma is a fruitcake...

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