The Libertine Page #4

l want to be one of that multitude.

l wish to be moved.

l cannot feel in life.

l must have others do it

for me here in the theatre.

You are spoken of as a man

with a stomach for life.

l am the cynic of our golden age.

This bounteous dish,

which our great Charles and our great God

have, more or less in equal measure, placed

before us, sets my teeth permanently on edge.

Life has no purpose.

lt is everywhere undone by arbitrariness.

l do this and it matters not a jot

if l do the opposite.

But in a playhouse,

every action , good or bad,

has its consequences.

Drop a handkerchief

and it will return to smother you .

The theatre is my drug.

And my illness is so far advanced

that my physic must be of the highest quality.

Oh, my lord,

on those conditions,

l endeavour to do what you want.

What l want is that we meet again tomorrow

to consider Ophelia.

Ophelia?

Mr Betterton will revive Hamlet next month

and you will play Ophelia.

Ophelia then if you wish.

But let us not neglect

the lesson in Mr Etherege's speech.

And what is that?

That women

should ever view men with suspicion .

l shall be happy to return and address our work

with that instruction

written on the inside of my skull.

- Do me now.

JANE:
How?

Mouth.

Trembling,

confused,

despairing, limber,

dry,

A wishing, weak,

unmoving lump l lie.

This...

..dart of love,

whose piercing point, oft tried,

With virgin blood 1 0,000 maids have dyed,

Now languid lies in this unhappy hour.

Shrunk up...

..and sapless,

like a withered flower.

l have a feeling this is going nowhere

l have that feeling too.

l've met this woman .

Lizzie Barry

That new actress?

- She ain't no looker

- There is spirit in her.

When a gent sees the spirit

and not the eyes or the tits,

then a gent is in trouble

Would you call me a cynic, Jane?

l'd call you a man who pretends

to like life more than he does.

ls that a cynic?

l'm just a moll-sack, l don't do questions

lf l am a cynic,

how have l fallen in love with a plain woman ,

whom l do not know?

You saw her on stage.

All the colours and them poems they say.

Gives them a glow

- You've seen her out of the theatre?

-No.

Well, then it's not her. lt's the theatre.

That or

Or what?

They say men fall three times.

First is calf love.

Second is the one you marry.

And third?

Third

Third is your deathbed bride.

You sniff her, you sniff your own shroud.

Ah.

How you have cheered me.

Go home and sleep.

- l don 't want to sleep.

- Then go home and think.

- l don 't ever want to think again .

- John .

Don 't make me care for you .

l'd rather you came your fetch over my face

than leave me with that,

a lump of caring.

Now go home and forget.

Much wine had passed wih grave discourse

Of who fucks who and who does worse

When l who still take care to see

Drunkenness relieved by lechery

Went out into St James's Park

To cool my head and fire my heart

But though St James has the honour on 't

'Tis consecrate to prick and c*nt

There by a most incestuous birth

Strange woods spring from the teeming earth

And nightly now beneath their shade

Are buggeries rapes and incests made

Mr Huysmans.

Perhaps a bottle and a glass would be

handsome adornments to your composition?

They are not appropriate objects

in a family portrait, my lord.

Mr Huysmans, here is another thought.

You see that monkey yonder

dancing to the fiddle?

Can't help but notice

how human these creatures are

l would sit that monkey

on a pile of solemn volumes,

and place in her hand a scrap of paper as if

it were a poem she'd just written , do you see?

And while she is offering the poem to me,

l am crowning her with the bays.

l find Lady Rochester

a more elegant and interesting subject.

You are wide of the point, sir.

Elegance, interest, all very well in their way.

But what do they illuminate?

Am l not then an apt partner for you to sit with?

You are apt, Elizabeth. You are very apt.

But you would rather be painted with a monkey?

lt is of a muchness.

You are both apt in your different ways.

ln this portrait l am no better than a monkey

who knows the names of his ancestors.

And l?

A gaudy female monkey,

gloating over the opulence of your cage.

l love London .

Everyone catches its generous spirit so quickly.

lndeed.

l do not mean to upset people, Alcock,

but l have to speak my mind,

because what is in my mind

is always more interesting

than what is happening

in the world outside my mind.

Makes you impossible to live with, though,

do you see?

Did l once praise you for your blunt manner?

lt was your reason for employing me.

lt could as easy be your grounds for dismissal.

Now, get me the monkey.

John .

John , l could bear our marriage more easily

if there were no pretence.

lf l were merely a housekeeper

and a conduit for the noble line.

But when you're away you write

so beguilingly of how you love me and...

..l do not think you mean to torture me,

but it is a torture

to be informed of passion from a distance

and then in the flesh to be so reviled.

You know l always mean to be well

when we are together,

but after a few weeks, l find l have no gift for it.

ln my mind l am somewhere else.

Then cut me out of your heart completely

and have done.

Do not command me to do something

beyond my power.

ls the fault mine? lf l were a better wife...

would you not need

the whorehouse and the inn ?

Every man needs the whorehouse and the inn .

But it's not the inn or a whore that l see

in your eyes. lt's some other creature.

The playhouse.

An actress.

And when your eyes shone the other day,

they were shining for her.

They were.

l see l am more of an obstacle

to your London life than l supposed.

l'll be gone by the morning.

My lord.

How is Ophelia in this scene?

Well, she's mad. She's out of her wits.

There are many ways to be out of your wits.

Yes.

Well, there's grief.

And drink.

And love.

So l hear.

These different states,

how would you show them?

Show them?

Their physical manifestation .

Close your eyes.

Close your eyes.

Oh, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown

The courtier's, soldier's, scholar's

eye, tongue, sword and l

Again

Oh, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown .

- The courtier's, soldier's...

- Again .

Oh, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown .

The courtier's, soldier's, scholar's, eye...

Again

- Eye tongue sword

- Again!

- Oh, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown.

is here o'erthrown

The courtier's, soldier's, scholar's...

- Again.

- What was wrong?

You know what was wrong. Again.

She has done this speech

20 times this afternoon.

And she will do it 20 more.

No-one has worked like this

in the history of the theatre

- Exactly.

- Oh, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown

The courtier's, soldier's, scholar's,

eye, tongue, sword...

and l

of ladies most deject and wretched

that sucked the honey of his music vows

O, what a noble mind is here o'erthrown .

The courtier's,

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