The Lucky Ones Page #2

So your fiance is meeting you in Vegas?

No. She's stationed at Fort Dix.

I'm gonna meet her there afterwards.

Oh, I get it.

First, a little fun at the tittie bars.

No. I got business to take care of.

You paying back a gambling debt?

Wrong again.

Randy had a gambling debt.

Yep.

That's why he had to rob Lucky Jim's.

He stole $50,000 so he could

pay back the loan sharks.

But then of course,

the cops got on his tail, and...

and that's when he enlisted.

You know, he just went...

went right into the Army

and disappeared.

It was the perfect getaway.

See, that's exactly

what the Army doesn't want.

The Army's got standards.

Like, it... it means something.

It's not like lowlifes and gangbangers.

What?

The last thing we need is trash

like your pal Randy.

- They don't want...

- F*** you! F*** you!

- Whoa!

- What the f*** is wrong with you?

That "trash" saved my f***ing life!

He pulled me outta that truck

when I got shot!

And he took a f***ing bullet

in the f***ing head!

All I got left is his f***ing guitar!

Get back in the car.

Get back in the car!

I ought to kick your ass!

Oh, you're gonna kick my ass.

Yeah. I could do it, too.

I'd just push you

down a flight of stairs,

punch you in the kidney.

You'd better have eyes

in the back of your head.

This is not... We don't have time

for ass-kicking stops.

You just say you're sorry,

and let's get going.

- I'm not sorry!

- I'm not talking to you.

- Say you're sorry.

- No. I'm not gonna say I'm sorry.

That's like saying I'm sorry

that the sky's blue.

Come on, man. You just...

You just insulted her dead friend. Huh?

Come on. Suck it up.

Say you're sorry. Let's go.

I'm sorry that you got so upset.

Okay?

No. That's not an apology.

But it's pretty close.

Come on, let's go.

That's not an apology.

Come on. Let me in.

Dude, let me in.

I can't.

Just press the key thing, man.

The keys are in the car.

Sh*t.

What the f*** were you thinking?

I was thinking I had two f***ing nut cases

throwing sh*t, getting into a fight.

- We didn't fight.

- This is not my fault.

Well, it's sure as sh*t not our fault.

We didn't lock the keys in the car.

Whatever. We need a coat hanger.

Coat hanger's not gonna work

on a late model car.

You need a Slim Jim.

Well, you know what?

I don't have a Slim Jim.

Thank you.

So, they went on this worldwide tour,

and they... they got...

'cause they got this contract.

And they got to meet the queen,

and they got to meet the president.

And after that,

Randy got the guitar from his daddy,

who got it from his granddaddy,

who got it from Elvis.

Elvis.

Come on.

It's true.

That guitar's worth a lot of money.

She's a beaut, don't you think?

Yeah. I already got one, though.

- You do?

- Yeah.

Me, too.

That's great. What color?

So, how is it over there?

You guys see any action?

- Yep.

- Yeah.

Yeah?

Well, we all think

you're doing a hell of a job.

- Thank you.

- Thanks.

No, no. Thank you.

You know, we get clients all the time

in the dealership who want

their Hummers outfitted just like yours.

The desert camouflage, the whole bit.

One guy even put armor on his H1.

They want bullet holes?

Yeah, they probably do.

Hey, check this out.

Push that third button right back there.

Not bad, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah. Bet you guys

don't have that on your vehicles.

No, sir, we don't.

You got it?

- That didn't take long.

- Thank you.

I have to use the bathroom.

I'll pull over by those bushes.

No, I said "use the bathroom,"

not squat by the side of the road.

And the weird and wacky talent

this week is...

Congratulations, Wayne.

All yours.

Do you want to play pool, or...

pinball or something?

Nah. We should get going.

Okay.

Turn it down!

Turn it off!

Is this a good show?

Yeah.

I've never seen it before.

Is it new?

Not that new.

I've haven't really seen

much of anything lately

'cause I've been overseas

the past 14 months, and...

you know, I'm in the Army.

But I'm home on leave for 30 days,

so I'm just... I'm hoping to catch up.

I like your jacket.

It's okay.

What's the "I" stand for?

Indiana.

You know, the college and the state

where you're standing right now.

Yeah, you know, I was thinking

of going to college when I get out, but...

Do you like it?

Do you think you could be quiet?

Sure, I can be quiet.

Good.

No way.

You know, I'm limping

because when I was over there,

I got shot in the leg.

That wasn't very smart, was it?

Hey! Hey, hey, hey!

Back off! Back off!

What's wrong with you guys?

Back off!

Calm down.

No, that's right. Be afraid.

No, be very afraid.

Go, go, go!

All right!

Yeah! We won!

Kicked their college asses!

Kicked their college asses!

Oh, this girl's crazy.

Yeah.

Just glad I didn't have my weapon.

TV! TV! TV!

- I wish we had some booze.

- Yeah.

Check my bag.

Doctor in Germany gave me

a bottle of schnapps.

And a tough night here at the arena

for the home team.

- Thank you.

- All right.

Not bad.

I mean, what you really want

after a fight is whiskey

'cause it mellows you out.

If you want to get mean, you drink gin,

vodka if you want to zone out,

and you save tequila

for when you want to get crazy.

She didn't need tequila tonight.

Did anybody see a straw around here?

No. Why?

'Cause if you drink through a straw,

it gets you drunker.

That's not true.

Of course it is.

That's ridiculous.

How could that be true?

Well, I don't really know how it works.

It just... It...

It just gets in...

It just goes in faster.

Oh, it's just one of...

one of the mysteries of life?

- Is that what you're saying?

- Uh-huh.

Sh*t, man.

You okay?

I was...

You know.

Sorry.

Honey, it's me.

You there?

Pick up.

Okay. Well, we got held up a little bit,

but we'll be rolling in

in about two hours or so.

Is that the Mississippi?

That's it.

I always wanted to go

on one of those riverboats.

You know?

Do you think maybe we could stop?

No.

Pat!

Pat!

Honey! I'm home!

Honey?

Sure you got the right house?

Yeah.

Can't believe your own dog

doesn't know you.

We don't have a dog.

Yes, sir.

You have a good life here, Cheaver.

There you are.

Fred.

You're home.

I missed you.

God, I missed you.

Let me get the dog to stop.

Whose dog is that?

Mine.

No, no, no.

Pogo, you come with me.

Yes. You come with me.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

I'm gonna put you in here for a while.

Yes, I know. I'm sorry.

Mommy loves you.

So.

Where you been all my life?

How's your back?

It's fine.

Doesn't matter now.

Scott spent the night at Brad's house.

He should be back soon.

Great.

Where are your friends?

They're out back.

Don't you think we should get them?

Well, sure. Yeah.

- Let 'em in.

- Okay.

Welcome.

Can I get you something to drink?

Yeah.

Do you want one, Fred?

No. Thanks.

Well, I bet you're all glad to be back.

- Yeah.

- Oh, yes, ma'am.

Excuse me for a minute.

Sit down.

So.

How are you?

Fine.

Are you sure?

Is anything wrong?

No. Nothing.

Something's wrong.

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